Discover Top Posts Tagged with #laura roe

Motherhood II - Birthstory for Melissae

Labor started at midnight on Sunday September 3rd. Right smack on your due date. I was lying in bed asleep and woke up @ about 11:45pm with what felt like contractions. I woke up your father + told him I thought I was having contractions. He thundered awake wanting to know if he should get my ‘scullcap’ to help me sleep? I reassured him that we still had some time + got up to see what my ‘when to call’ list from our midwife Laura said. Sure enough ‘Rhythmic contractions of 5 or more in an hour’ was on the list. So I started counting. At 12:58am after counting my fifth I called Laura. ‘Hello’ she said in a cheery voice. I told her what I was feeling + she said ‘go take your scullcap + go back to sleep and call me in the morning or if anything changes or if your water breaks.’ I said ok + your daddy went + got the scullcap out of our birth kit and started filling the hot tub. I took a dropperful and slept mostly off and on through + between uterine contractions that felt like moderate menstrual cramps through the night. The night before we had visitors arrive Julie and her two daughters Nyonchele + Naaye. Julie is a dear friend of mine from Portland, who also happens to be a midwife and a magical woman. We had planned the visit half joking that I’d likely go into labor seeing as it was your due birth date and that she’d get to be my midwife after all. And sure enough, here I was in labor. When I woke up your father and I decided to have as natural and normal of a day as possible but also restful + internal.

Outside was horribly smoky from the Chetco-Barr fire and other wildfires surrounding us here in the Rogue River Valley. The smoke was so thick you couldn’t see the mountains in front of our house. So we turned the AC on and sat inside eating, drinking water + teas and reading. Julie + her girls, despite the smoke went into town for the day to Lithia Park + Science Works to give us some time. Your dad called our friends Thom + Ashley to come over and help him with last minute preparations. I rested + read + ate good food + paused through the contraction. Laura + I talked + agreed to just see if + how things changed. That night around 8:30/9, about our bed time contractions started coming on a little stronger + I took two droppers of scullcap + tried to sleep. That night I labored through the whole night alone. Trying to sleep changing positions, drinking a lot of water + moaning. By the morning I was pretty exhausted. I called Laura and asked her to come over. I wanted to be checked and I wanted to have her monitor you as I had felt much less of you over the past several days. She came over + when she got there we had a full household, Julie + her two girls, who were running around the living room playing and having fun + Ashley + Thom. We were all talking + having a nice time after breakfast. For me, the contractions were lighter again over the night both in intensity + frequency. I noticed when I talked a lot in conversation with people the contractions would lessen + widen out. I knew I needed more quietude but I didn’t know exactly how to get it. Luckily Julie + her kids were leaving that morning + Laura agreed we needed to clear the house and make it more of a date between the two of us.

She also checked my cervix and I was 3cm dilated and my cervix was 90% effaced, or thinned out. She was happily surprised as was I. She also helped me craft a night plan so I always had someone with me when it got dark to get me things + take care of me + just be with me over the hard times. Ashley + Thom went home for the day with the plan of coming back that night around 9pm. Your dad + I then proceed to have a beautiful, romantic day, we took a hot tub and made love which was amazing and took a nap together. By dinner the contractions were getting a little heavier but still irregular. We mad yummy tacos for dinner and listened to music and danced. Earlier we had sat at the altar and cried + talked about how lucky we are + how much we loved you and each other + how lucky we are to have found one another to Jeff Buckley’s ‘Hallelujah’. It was a blissful easy day. I could only eat one of my tacos for dinner + went in to the altar to lay face down on the yoga ball your Dad had blown up for me just that day. Your dad came in to find me face down on the ball rocking back + forth or bouncing listening to music. It really soothed me. Your Papa came in and brought me coconut Bliss ‘mocha maca crunch’ and we ate it together, him feeding me it in spoonfuls. We both noticed a change in the contractions so he started timing. The contractions were lasting for close to 2 minutes + coming every 2-10 minutes. He texted Laura with this info and still she wanted to ‘wait + see’ for a little while longer or until my water broke. A couple of hours later I was ready to have her there with us and Ashley + Thom had arrived again for the night.

By the time Laura arrived around midnight, contractions were really rolling + it was hard to talk during one. After Laura arrived your Dad went down for a little nap + your Auntie Ashley + Uncle Thom woke up to be my helpers. For the first long while I labored in the hot tub taking contractions either squatting or floating on my belly. In between contractions I would sip water or electrolytes from a straw, then rest my head on a towel on the edge of the tub until the next contraction. At some point Laura recommended I reach up in my yoni and see what I could feel. Sure enough there was a bulging sac of your waters and if I pressed on it I felt your head. I was elated. You were close and I could feel you! I also felt my cervix and it felt like a thin slippery doughnut all around the sac. For the next several contractions I focused on relaxing and surrendering to the opening of my cervix so you could come through. Being under the trees and the fresh air + red (from the smoke) harvest moon was beautiful. Laura reminded me that right now around the world 300,000 other women were doing the same thing this gave me hope + strengthened and inspired me. We discussed the breaking of your waters but decided against it. Laura believes that things happen for a reason + indeed they did. At that point we also decided to wake up Daddy. I knew he wouldn’t want to miss any of this. When Daddy came he got in the hot tub and in between contractions I could rest back into his arms. It was almost heavenly. I could have stayed in there forever. But Laura reminded us that the air temp was getting pretty cold to birth out there and said that if I wanted things to progress I should probably get out and do some walking around. So after the next contraction we got out and I came inside.

Ashley fed me some peanut butter toast + I took a contraction in the kitchen. Then I had to go to the bathroom. While I was on the toilet I had another contraction and as was my habit I reached up into my yoni to feel for the sac only this time it broke. WHOA! That was an incredible sensation as the strength of the contraction literally quadrupled. I let out a loud long song of release and surprise. It was intense and amazing. And then it passed. I came out + told everyone that my waters had broken. For the next few I labored on the yoga ball but the contractions were super intense and I was feeling a lot of hip + back pain. When the tub was ready I got in + continued to labor in there. Again resting my head + drinking fluids in between. Your Dad was by my side + I was pushing now helping you move down lower + lower. After a while I started to get uncomfortable in the tub trying to relax + stretch in between + be in a squat for contractions. At some point I looked at Laura + I could tell she was wanting some thing different. I asked her what we should do and she recommended getting out of the tub + trying some other positions. She also wanted to check your position and our progress. By this time Laura’s assistant Veege was there + together they examined us and found that your head was all the way through the cervix and showed me how to push by applying pressure on my bottom and coaching me through a few. Shortly after this came a long pause, called quiscence. Where there were no contractions + we all just rested.

Once the contractions started up again I was on the birthing stool in front of the tub. About that time your Dad opened the front curtains. ‘It’s dawn babe our little Zama is almost here’. Again I was cheered and touched by this. It made my heart lift to think of how close you were. This is when the pushing truly began. I sat near the windows in the morning light + with every contraction I bore you down. The pressure was incredible but it was not painful. I re-positioned myself several times on + off the birthing stool, on one knee kneeling and each time I reached inside + felt your head making progress. Finally you began to crown. ‘Ring of fire, ring of fire!’ I called out as I began to feel you coming all the way through. It took several contractions for me to get your head all the way out and when I finally did it was pure bliss for one brief second before Laura started to dig with both hands into my vagina. ‘What are you doing?’ I asked. ‘I’m assisting the shoulders,’ she said. ‘Should I push?’ ‘Yes’ ‘Should I wait for the next contraction?’ ‘No, push now’ So push I did with all my strength + sure enough woosh you came jetting out along with a tidal wave of amniotic fluid, blood, meconium + there you were being placed on my chest pink + wet + beautiful covered with vernix. I kept asking ‘is she ok is she ok is everything ok?’ Your daddy was with me holding you too + crying as you took your first breaths. Veege was there checking your pulse + your breathing as you coughed up a tiny bit of fluid from your mouth + nose and started to make your first sounds. You were perfect of course + everyone rejoiced as Laura + Veege helped me birth the placenta. At that time we also noticed that you had a ‘true knot’ in your cord, which may have been why you chose to come gradually rather than rapidly. Uncle Thom was busy taking photos of your first moments.

After the placenta was birthed we moved me to the couch so I could hold you + Laura gave us 5min alone with you to coo and cuddle after helping me get you latched on my breast. When the midwives came back they examined my yoni + found I only had one small tear + the bleeding appeared normal. Earlier right after you came out they gave me several herbs to help with the bleeding. And now it was time to go upstairs + settle in for our first day with you and the long healing process. Because of the tear I was put on 5-7 days strict bed rest + Laura instructed us not to pass you around to too many visitors but to stay skin to skin with you as much as possible, eating + sleeping together as much as possible. For me the after care was some of the hardest part feeling so sore + vulnerable down there while also having to figure out how to nurse you + get a good latch + how to share responsibilities at night + keep up my energy with enough sleep + calories. By Friday we were pretty in the swing of things my milk was in you were nursing like a boss and sleeping a lot at night. You are the light of my life with your peaceful, wise temperment and your shock of red/orange hair. I adore you and my love for your father grows stronger through you. This time of your birth, preparation for your birth and care afterwards has brought us all more deeply in love than we thought possible. Birth itself was both instructive + inspiring that something like that is possible with just the human body and a loving attendant(s) is both mind blowing + empowering in a powerful way. I’m already thinking about what I would like to do differently next time. What fun.