“Get up, loser, we’re going shopping.” The reference was wasted on him, but she’d said it anyways, leaning against the doorframe and smiling in hopes that it wouldn’t start a fight,. She was only joking, and while she couldn’t expect him to understand the joke, maybe he could at least understand facial expressions. Her hopes weren’t high, though. He was a big, sensitive baby, prone to outbursts and tantrums. Most likely, all she’d accomplished was pissing him off.
Oh. The woes of trans-dimensional house guests.
She didn’t give him time to start said tantrum, though, throwing a pair of sweatpants and an over-large (for her) sweatshirt at him. They were hers, and while she expected the pants to be short on him, she also expected them to go over better than suggesting Zak’s clothes had.
‘Too tight’, ‘too small’, ‘they smell funny’ - the complaints had been unending, and the whole ordeal had been concluded with him hurling them at her face as she hurled insults at him about his ass being too fat to fit into the pants. It hadn’t been her best performance, as far as diplomacy went. Honestly, any conversation with him was essentially her worst performance, as far as diplomacy went.
He always managed to bring out the worst in her, needling her temper and tugging at the already frayed strands of her patience. And, she suspected, he did it on purpose. If he didn’t, then she didn’t know what was worse - doing it on purpose, or being too dense to realize he was doing it accidentally.
Regardless. They needed to go shopping, and he couldn’t wear his furs to do so.
“You can’t go walking around outside wearing your Tarzan get up.” She folded her arms over her chest. “We need to get you proper clothes for while you’re stuck here, and since you’re too much of a big baby to just wear Zak’s clothes, that entails leaving the house and going to get you new ones.”
She didn’t see why they couldn’t just summon them. Zak’s moral compass was a strange and confusing thing - apparently, doing that was stealing. Summoning books and potion ingredients, though, oh - that was allowed.
“So put those on. They won’t fit perfectly, but they’re loose, and you can just deal until we find you ones that really fit.” As she spoke, she knew she should have been being nicer about the whole thing. She couldn’t imagine being in his shoes, away from everyone and everything he’d ever known. It was understandable that he was upset, and irritable - but understanding it didn’t make it any easier to put up with it.
She paused, rubbing her chin for a second, then running her hand through her hair. “Once... we get you normal clothes, that fit properly, you should be able to go out for runs, or walks, or... whatever. So.. if that sounds like something you want, uh. Get dressed, and meet me downstairs.”
As an afterthought, she paused as she turned away from the room, peeking back through the door. Be nice, be nice - it was a mantra in her head as she tacked on the last word.
“-Please.” Then, she was gone, off to get the car ready and hope that he would actually cooperate.
