A Laughing Matter
This one is for an anon that requested some Sir Pentious and Alastor tickles! I couldn’t help but do a little bit of both, and let’s be honest, Charlie would definitely be the cause of a little tickle fight between the two of them. Enjoy!
Word Count: 1644
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The Happy Hotel lobby was rather quiet one morning, which was unusual. Alastor sat in his chair by the fireplace, sipping tea with a calm demeanor that was somehow more unnerving than his usual grin. He was reading some old novel, humming a jazzy tune contently. Charlie glanced at him from across the room, analyzing him. She loved having Alastor around, his charisma was undoubtedly fun to…try to banter with, and his power was more than welcome when it came to executing her dreams of helping the sinners. However, the constantly radiating menace around him, intentional or not, was getting kind of exhausting.
She finally huffed, marching over to Alastor and disturbing the peace. “Okay, that’s it! We need to fix this! Alastor, you are too…serious! All the time!”
Alastor placed his tea on the small table beside his chair and lowered his book. He looked at her, and once again flashed his usual grin. His eyebrow raised slightly as his radio-static voice crackled, “My dear Charlie, I find this accusation most perplexing. I am the life of the party!”
Charlie crossed her arms and shook her head. “That grin doesn’t count. You have this air about you and I’ve decided you need to lighten up.” She paused for a moment before her eyes lit up. “Aha! I know just who can help!”
Before Alastor had time to protest, she marched out of the room. He watched her go with a brow raised, internally curious as to where this came from and where this was going. A few moments later, she returned with no other than Sir Pentious.
“Why, hello Alassstor! My greatessst mortal enemy!” Sir Pentious sneered, puffing out his chest. “It looksss like you require my expertissse!”
Alastor tilted his head, even more curious at the turn of events. “I fail to see how you could teach me anything of value.” He spoke simply, picking up his tea once more to take a small sip.
Charlie interjected. “Come on, Alastor! Just go along with it. Pentious, your mission is to get Alastor to loosen up, have fun, laugh a little! A real one.”
Sir Pentious’ grin widened as his eyes gleamed with mischief. “Oh, don’t you worry, Princcccesss! I, SSSir Pentiousss, will gladly take on this misssion and will not let you down!” He stood proudly, while Alastor stared at him with a deadpan expression and signature smile.
The rest of the day was complete chaos. Sir Pentious attempted several schemes to get some sort of joyous reaction from Alastor, and they all failed. He started with simple jokes that merely got an eyeroll from the Overlord. He then tried creating a few traps, his favorite being one that released balloons when Alastor walked into the kitchen. Still, Alastor merely stepped aside and flicked his hand as if swatting a fly away.
“Ah, my dear snake,” Alastor quipped after another one of the elaborate surprises failed, “Your dedication to this buffoonery Charlie requested of you is almost…commendable. Almost.”
Sir Pentious huffed, clearly frustrated by Alastor's unshakable composure. “You mock me now, but you’ll ssssee! I ssshall break that infernal grin of yoursss into an actual laugh, or I will revoke my title as an evil massstermind!” He huffed. He started at Alastor momentarily as his mind raced, before his eyes lit up with sudden inspiration. “Oh ho ho! I’ve got it! If my cunning and ingeniousss trapsss won’t do, then I ssshall resssort to the mossst ancient of all techniquesss…tickle torture!”
Alastor’s eyebrow twitched ever so slightly at that proclamation. “Tickle torture?” he repeated, his tone bemused, but a flicker of uncertainty crossed his otherwise cool demeanor. “Resorting to the most childish methods, hmm?”
“Oh, I’m deadly sssseriousss, Alassstor,” Sir Pentious hissed, slithering closer with an almost cartoonish sneer. “No one can withsssstand it! Not even you.”
Alastor simply hummed and casually took a few steps backward. “Do your worst, snake.”
Sir Pentious cackled maniacally, lunging at Alastor with all his serpentine speed. In an attempt to deter Sir Pentious and his confidence, Alastor didn’t move to stop him. Instead, he allowed Sir Pentious to coil his tail around him and deliver a flurry of ticklish pokes to his sides. He was able to maintain a calm demeanor for only a few moments before he accidentally let out a noise that he was desperately trying to suppress. He let out a sound that could only be described as a choked snort.
The radio demon immediately straightened his posture, his eyes narrowing dangerously as the static from his body spiked for a brief moment. “Ahem,” he said, regaining his composure. “That was merely a reflex.”
Sir Pentious froze mid-tickle, his jaw dropping. “Wasss that a laugh? Did I hear a laugh?!”
Charlie, who had been curiously observing from her desk within the lobby gasped, her hands flying to her mouth. “No way! Alastor, you actually—”
“It was not a laugh,” Alastor interjected sharply as he looked over ot face her, his grin faltering for just a moment before resetting itself. “And whatever noise you think you heard, it shall not happen again.”
“Oh, thisss isss preciousss!” Sir Pentious cried, his confidence renewed. “You’re not immune after all! I ssshall have you in sssstitchesss before the day isss done!”
Before Alastor could react, Sir Pentious redoubled his efforts, wiggling his fingers along Alastor’s ribs and sides with devilish precision. Alastor, despite his best attempts to maintain his unflappable demeanor, began to twitch and shift uncomfortably. Static crackled faintly in the air, but it was becoming increasingly clear that even the mighty Radio Demon had his limits.
“Stop this at once,” Alastor choked out, his tone firm but laced with an edge of uncharacteristic desperation.
“Oh, no, no, no,” Sir Pentious replied gleefully. “Not until you admit defeat and give usss a proper laugh!”
Charlie was practically gleaming by this point. “Alastor, just let it out! Come on, you’ll feel so much better!”
“Never!” Alastor barked, but his resolve finally broke when Sir Pentious found a particularly sensitive spot just below his ribs. A deep, rich, and surprisingly melodic laugh burst forth from the Overlord, echoing through the room.
Both Charlie and Sir Pentious froze in shock at the sound. Alastor, realizing what had just happened, straightened up, and tried to regain his usual composure. “Well,” he spoke with a smooth yet clearly strained voice, “I suppose congratulations are in order. You managed to achieve what few have dared to attempt.”
Sir Pentious puffed out his chest triumphantly. “Hah! I told you I would sssucceed! You ssshould be thanking me for bessstowing you the gift of laughter!”
Charlie grinned at Alastor. “See? That wasn’t so bad, was it? You should do it more often!”
Alastor’s smile sharpened into something a little more sinister. “Oh, my dear Charlie, if you think I’ll let this slide you’re gravely mistaken. Pentious, consider this your warning. No one tickles the Radio Demon and gets away with it.”
Sir Pentious gulped, suddenly less confident as Alastor’s shadow seemed to loom larger. Charlie laughed awkwardly and took that as her cue to stammer an excuse to leave.
“Radio Demon, I wasss merely doing a favor for a dear friend-” He goes to protest, but doesn’t have the chance to finish before Alastor cuts him off with a widened and unnerving grin and hum of disapproval.
“Oh, Sir Pentious, you didn’t think I’d let this little incident go unanswered, did you?” He spoke with an exaggerated sigh.
Before Sir Pentious could slither backward in retreat, Alastor’s shadow warped unnaturally, tendrils snaking out from the floor and latching onto the serpent demon.
“W-Wait! No, no, no!” Sir Pentious stammered, thrashing as the shadows hoisted him into the air. “I wassss only following Charlie’ssss orderssss! Thissss isn’t fair!”
“I believe this is extremely fair, considering I put up with your ridiculous antics all day.” Alastor growled with a dark chuckle. “You mentioned you, ahem, bestowed me the gift of laughter? Allow me to return the favor!”
With a flick of his wrist, the shadows coiled tighter around Sir Pentious, immobilizing him. Alastor’s long, gloved fingers wiggled menacingly as he closed in. “Let’s see just how ticklish a snake can be,” he snarled, his grin widening almost inhumanly.
“No! Not there! Anywhere but—!” Sir Pentious erupted into uncontrollable laughter the moment Alastor’s fingers made contact with his sides. The serpent squirmed helplessly, his hisses and screeches blending into peals of laughter as Alastor exploited every weak point he could find with precision.
“Oh, this is delightful,” Alastor mused, his voice laced with wicked glee. “You’ve truly outdone yourself, Pentious. I haven’t had this much fun in ages!” He moved his fingers to trail beneath the suit jacket to skitter along his slippery stomach.
“P-Pleasssse! Mercccy!” Sir Pentious squealed, giggling hysterically and high-pitched. “I-I can’t take it!” He squirmed and writhed in the Overlord’s tentacles, throwing his head back in hysterical laughter. The poor snake was a walking ball of sensitivity.
Alastor tilted his head, pretending to consider the plea. “Mercy? Hmm. No, I don’t believe I’m familiar with that concept.” He chuckled, continuing his torture as he found a particularly good spot where the center of his stomach would be.
After what felt like an eternity to Sir Pentious but in reality was only a few minutes, Alastor finally relented, stepping back and allowing the shadows to release their grip. The serpent demon collapsed onto the floor in a heap, gasping for breath and still giggling faintly from the residual sensations.
Alastor dusted off his hands and adjusted his tie, his grin as sharp as ever. “Well, that was invigorating. I do hope you’ve learned a valuable lesson, Pentious.”
Sir Pentious groaned, still too winded to muster a proper retort as Alastor walked away with a huff. And with that, the Happy Hotel returned to its usual brand of chaotic normalcy…for now.
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Thanks for reading! I’ll have another fic posted soon! And probably have the audio that you all decide from the poll written up to be published on Thursday 🎉
