#leora lorepost

[ask-leora-elara]

I thought you were friends with Curly and Jimmy??? You saw what he went through and that just didnt phase you or?....

I am. I... was friends with them. Jim and I have always had an on and off friendship but. that's not the fucking point. I fucking... Fuck. I've known Colt just as long as I've known them. Longer if I think about it. He's been my manager since I moved here. He's always had problems, I don't need to tell you that. But things are WAY worse with him then they've EVER been. I can't even look at his blog half the time with how he talks about Jim. It makes me fucking sick. ...I've seen how good of a person he can be though. He's brought his kids to work. I've watched them paint his nails, watched him hold them while he's on the phone, smiling ear to ear. Both of them are such fucking sweethearts... They love him. Hell I've seen Jane too and when things weren't bad they- ...Listen. It's not my place to talk about that. The point is that he hasn't always been this fucking awful of a person. It's easy to write people like him off. Curly and Jimmy absolutely should write him off and have nothing to do with him, and I'm also not saying that other people shouldn't, but people like him through all their fucking problems need someone around to help them. I dont' even know why I'm taking the time to try and justify this to you. I fucking hate to see him spiraling like this and I just want to help him, okay??

...that was all this was supposed to be.

[ask-leora-elara]

...I never wanted to be the person that posts about shit like this on their blog, but its fucking killing me right now and I can't stop thinking about it A few days after Curly and I started dating is when I was "officially" introduced to Jim. Hindsight's 2020 of course, but I'm almost certain Curly was nervous to tell him about it. At the time I had only seen Jim tag along with Curly every now and then to the store that I work at. He opened up to him about me within the first few weeks of us dating? (If not a shorter amount a time) He told me that they were on and off and that he loved him still even though Jim didn't want anything official. He was so embarrassed about it and I was so naive, just seeing it as him bearing his heart to me. Being polyamorous, it didn't bother me that he had feelings for other people but I didn't mention it at the time. Felt too weird to bring up but sometimes I wish I did at that point.

Not too long after that I caught them. I was asleep at Curly's and snuggled up behind him. He was on his phone jacking off with Jim. He "woke me up" to move so he could go get clean after they were done and had left the phone in there. I was bawling my fucking eyes out and Jim heard it all. We... "talked" for a moment before Curly came back in. Talked in quotations because I mean. You guys probably saw the post where he said it "wasn't his fault Curly couldn't keep his hands off of him." He had the same mindset then.

That was less than a month in and we dated for several. I ignored it because well... It really wouldn't have bothered me if he wanted to pursue Jim while we were dating. If he had just told me instead of... God. Either way I fucking opened the relationship a week later like a coward and never told him I saw. Jim was more than happy to keep quiet about it too. He was so fucking happy I couldn't stay mad at him about it.

...I tried so fucking hard to keep things going. I really did. I loved him so much I wanted it to work no matter what. It got to the point where he was barely even seeing me, let alone messaging. It had been a week when I forced him to meet up with me and I finally broke things off. It was ugly. At that point I was so angry and I figured there was no way in hell he even cared. I just wanted everything off my chest. But he was hurt. Way more hurt than I was expecting. I felt like such an ass for everything I said. I still miss him. I still love him and I hate that I do.

[ask-leora-elara]

Girlypop /they/themypop

I think Colton just broke into Jimmy’s apartment

You're fucking with me right?? Because that isn't a funny joke. ...No you aren't. Holy shit. How the fuck did he get his address???? He kept fucking pressing it for me but I wouldn't give it to him how the FUCK DID HE GET IT.

...the other day he asked if he could borrow my phone to call Prudence off of. He said his phone died. Fuck. I wasn't fucking thinking. FUck fuck fuck fuck No no no no no NO NO NO NO NO NO NO. This can't be real. this can't be fucking happening. I can't do this. I can't fucking do this.

[ask-leora-elara]

So you admitted you still love him, and he admitted he's been sleeping around like crazy. You slept with him, didn't you?

Yes, Okay. We slept together. Y'all finally got it out of me. I think I was more desperate for it than he was.

Leave him alone, okay? He's gotten enough shit for it.

[ask-leora-elara]

A little birdie told me you were Curly's ex... How'd you two meet?

... I mean yeah, that's true. I am in fact his ex but uh. I really don't wanna be known as just his ex. I'm my own person just like he's his own, and he's my friend first and foremost.

We met at the store I work at! He walked in one day out of curiosity. I'm originally from the midwest/south so I can uh... come off very extroverted and talkative when doing my usual check-out-the-customer routine. It puts a lot of people off around here and a lot of the time I don't even get a hi back anyway. Curly was always just as polite and talkative back with me. To my own detriment sometimes, I'm super introverted IRL lol We had a really good chat one day while I was having a smoke break and he gave me his number to keep in touch. We have a lot of the same like. Ideals and stances on things and things just progressed from there.