#ler writes

[kimryes]

yo @nilziio it is i, your far cry 5 birthday bash gifter!!! i wrote a grace/jess soulmate au for you (the standard “the first thing your soulmate says to you directly is tattooed somewhere on your body in their handwriting” variety bc i’m a slut for it). hope you like it, and @edensgay ur the loml thanks for setting this up!

Jess never talked much around Grace. Not that she said much in general, save for tactical updates and the occasional boast about her bloodlust. But it was obvious when the Deputy took her and the sharpshooter out in the field together - everyone thought they’d have a lot to discuss, and lord knew Grace made the effort to strike up some small talk. Jess just didn’t bite, and that would have to be that until the dust settled and her worldview wasn’t clouded red.

Or, better yet, Jess would never have to talk to her directly - ever - and things wouldn’t have to change for the worse. The Hey there, I’m Grace - you’re pretty good with that bow under her ribcage in the older woman’s just-barely-legible scrawl wouldn’t have to lead to anything. She could focus on killing, and not obsess over Grace’s every breath and movement like she imagined soulmates did. They were teammates, and they were gonna stay that way.

But Peggies had to fucking ruin everything, didn’t they?

It was their job to see everything the others couldn’t, especially in a firefight. Naturally, Jess was the only one who saw the bearded fuck with a bat sneaking up on Grace across the way, too focused on picking off shouting peggies below while the Deputy ran through and liberated prisoners. She could put an arrow between his eyes easily, but there was no time to line up her shot. She hesitated - briefly - before her fear of losing Grace for certain overtook the fear of potentially losing her to stupid feelings.

“Shit, Grace, there’s a peggie fuck behind you!” She didn’t even have to shout anything else before the sniper whipped around and slammed the butt of her rifle into the man’s jaw, and took advantage of his brief disorientation to whip out her pistol and shoot him point blank.

Grace really was her soulmate - no other person could make her want to use a gun.

There was no time to discuss this revelation in the chaos that followed - obviously. It was better that way - Grace found Jess sitting alone on a hill under the cover of night, when words seemed to come to both of them a little easier. Grace didn’t say anything at first, just came up beside her and stood there, both of them staring off into the trees. Jess fleetingly thought comfortable silence could be enough.

“So,” Grace started (dammit). There was a slight quirk to her lips as she started to unwrap the flag from her neck, and even with her skin in shadow, Jess could make out her chicken scratch handwriting winding around it like the world’s worst tattoo choker. “You certainly made for an interestin’ mystery.”

“Oh.” Jess diverted her gaze to her knees, digging her fists further into the pockets of her hoodie. “Sorry. Must’ve been awkward for a kid.”

“My mom didn’t like it, that’s for sure. She had me wear a scarf or long-necked shirts all the time - wasn’t great in the summer, but I got used to it.” Jess gave her the barest hint of a smile as she began to rub at her arm. Finding one’s soulmate was branded as a life-changing event, something beautiful and profound, and all she could manage was stilted small talk. Funny how a few minutes before, she thought things could be approaching perfect - fuck, was this what love felt like all the time? Was it love?

“I guess this whole thing is why you were avoidin’ me.” Grace knew damn well the burden of the conversation was on her, and she was stepping up, like she always did. Jess’s first instinct was to defend herself, but there was no point - it was the truth, plain as day.

“You know me.” She drew her knees even closer to her chest. “I’m not good at dealin’ with stuff like that.”

“You’re not the only one.” Grace sighed, taking a knee so they could be eye-level. “This… I’m not-- goddammit.” Jess blinked; Grace never tripped up on her words. She never said anything before she had fully formulated it in her mind, never wasted time on words she didn’t mean, or didn’t know how to say. They were both in uncharted territory - it didn’t make Jess feel leagues better, but it certainly helped a bit. “You know I’d never force you into anything you didn’t want. Fuck, I don’t even know what I want.”

“Yeah.” Jess scratched at her bottom lip with her thumb, letting out a sigh of her own. “...Yeah.”

“You wanna tell me what you’re thinking?”

Jess had to snort at that - because she did. “Shit’s crazy. It’s hard enough losin’ people on our side. You know… friends and shit.” She spit out the word like something sour; Grace’s answering chuckle spurred her on. “I’ve felt enough pain from losin’ my family like that, Grace. I don’t wanna know what--” She stopped herself, not only because she was baring her soul in a way she wasn’t used to. There was no turning off these feelings, and she’d had them for months ever since Grace spoke to her for the first time. Whether or not they did something about this soulmate business, the feelings would always be there, and would die with her. “I… maybe it’s not all about that. It’s a big fuckin’ reason, but-- shit, I hate this.”

“Nah, I think I get you.” Grace tilted her head to the side, watching Jess steadily. “Vulnerability. It’s a bitch.” Jess scoffed in affirmation - leave it up to her to be able to put it so plainly. They lapsed into silence again, though now the air hung heavy - though whether it was due to all that was said, or unsaid, Jess certainly didn’t fucking know.

“I’m not stupid enough to intentionally put myself in danger.” Grace spoke up again after a few minutes, smirking over at her. “But with these words, I was tempted a few times over the years.”

“Didn’t know you put that much stock into soulmates.”

She shrugged - though Jess could swear her cheeks flushed a bit. “Sometimes. I don’t know if you’re religious at all, but we’re taught that God himself has a hand in pickin’ em. They’re made for you - and once you find them you’ll be whole.” She sighed, taking off her cap and setting it down behind her. “Not that I felt I wasn’t whole without them - you - but it was a comforting thought during the rougher days of my deployment. Made me feel like I had another reason to make it back, aside from my pops and just wanting to see Hope County again.”

Jess just nodded, staring off into space. She was born with the name of her soulmate right there on her arm, not to mention her future life’s dedication. Thinking of herself back then, full of hope and anticipation, dreaming of the Grace who’d pay her the most important compliment of her entire life… it was like watching someone else’s home movies. Her soulmate wasn’t a comfort to her when everything went to shit - how could she rely on someone who was otherwise nebulous, regardless if they were unknowingly right under her nose? Depending on someone like that only spelled danger, and Jess thought she knew better.

It was odd, now, to be thinking of all that again with Grace right next to her. There was no one better to rely on, all things considered, but she had already been doing so enough. As teammates, Jess only needed her as much as everyone else did, if at all. Did she want it to mean more?

Shit, overthinking was so unlike her. So was talking this out - maybe they could once this was all over, when no one was left to aim and fire at, when all there was to do when they weren’t rebuilding was to talk and try at something. Right now, the only thing Jess had the balls to do was shift ever so closer to Grace, take her hand out of her pocket, and set it on the grass between them in silent invitation.

Grace didn’t take long to notice. “You sure?”

Jess rolled her eyes. “Just… come on.”

Grace watched her for a moment before brushing her fingers over Jess’s, gripping them loosely. “I’m glad it’s you, y’know. I don’t want you doubtin’ that.”

Honestly, Jess’s thoughts weren’t far off from going down that dark ‘oh fuck, she didn’t even want it to be someone like me, she deserves someone not so fucked up’ road before she said that. “I’m glad it’s you, too.” Jess was struck by Grace’s answering smile, never having seen a warmer one on her face. She wouldn’t mind getting to see that smile again.

“You know I’m here for you.” God, Jess nearly laughed - did all soulmates think about the same thing within minutes of each other, or just them? “Not that I wasn’t before--”

“No, I know. That’s just who you are.” There was that smile again. Maybe, just maybe, Jess could make a habit out of getting to show up more. The fact that she even wanted to was proof as to how crazy feelings were.

“And you’re there for me, huh?” Grace chuckled, squeezing her hand. “Maybe that’s all we need this to be.”

Now that the words are out there, Jess figured it’d be ideal. They could go on as “normal”, even when everything changed. They wouldn’t be distracted from fighting the good fight, they wouldn’t get shit from the others, and a relationship couldn’t be used against them. But the weight of Grace’s hand around hers was a comforting one - comfort she’d forgotten. She couldn’t forget about her smile, either.

“Maybe.” Jess couldn’t stop staring at her, eyes tracing over every inch of Grace’s worn but beautiful face - she wouldn’t even chastise herself for thinking that. Grace stared back at her, brow knit in concern, but reached out anyway to smooth some of Jess’s wild hair from out of her eyes, palm caressing her cheek as she did so. That touch alone set her nerves abuzz - she didn’t know if she could handle anymore affection ever. Grace sensed her discomfort and immediately pulled her hand away - but relaxed a bit at the small-but-still-obvious look of disappointment that Jess’s expression twisted into.

“We don’t have to decide anything now - don’t even have to talk about it now. We can just keep sittin’ next to each other ‘til we’re needed.” She watched Jess carefully for any sign of protest, then turned back to the sky, pulling her hand away until the tips of their fingers were just barely touching. Jess could feel the release of tension in the air around them, but she still found herself frozen for a few seconds. She was right - this didn’t have to be an immediate conversation, because she trusted Grace enough to keep both of them alive until they were in a better situation. Finding their “better half” didn’t magically fix the issues of two women damaged by violence and loss.

So Jess turned to face the sky with her, something approaching content at the thought that she might be looking forward to a future when all this was over.

[kimryes]

just something fluffy i wrote for @falls-end of sharky and her deputy bc i LOVE her

addison’s miserable. sharky can see it in the way she’s been hunched over, shoulders tight and head hung, the whole time they’ve been at the elk jaw lodge. once crack about the name and that was it - she retreated to clean her guns and do whatever else alone. he can understand - he distantly remembers her off-handedly saying she’s been living in a cabin up here until recently. hope county’s hardly felt very homey as of late, but he can only imagine what she must be feeling, that psychopath jacob stomping all over her mountains.

but he doesn’t, because dammit, he’s gotta be the fun one. so he leaves her alone for now, and instead, devotes the brain power he’s got to the very near future. and he comes up with a plan - it’s not a great one (and it’s him admitting that) but it’s the best he can do when it comes to a field he’s less experienced in than he’d like to be: comfort.

he finds her in the same place he left her, and that only further makes him which he had a much better plan - or even more to offer. what said ‘i like you and i’m sorry batshit cultists are soiling your home and it’s making you sad’? a really nice gun? a field’s worth of flowers? both?

“hey addy,” he starts before he can get too lost in his thoughts. “i hate seein’ you like this - come on, let’s go.”

she turns to him, a brow raised. “normally i’m always down to go anywhere with you with no information, but uhh-- got a lot i gotta do.”

“psshaw. you’ve got nothin’ here that can’t wait or that can’t be done by someone else.” he motions for her to follow. “i’m takin’ you on a drive.”

she cackles. “oh yeah?”

“hell yeah.”

“you can’t drive for shit.”

“neither can you. makes us perfect for each other.” he realizes his blunder a little too late and is sure he’s red, but her smile just grows wider. huh; he files that image of her away for later. “but really, when’s the last time you let someone else take the reins, huh? we don’t have to go anywhere we haven’t already liberated - that way the streets’ll be free to hear us comin’ from a mile away thanks to the shit you call music blastin’ from the radio.”

she lets out a mock-gasp, putting her hands to her heart. “sharky, you’re really gonna let me play my country shit? you must be desperate.”

“yes, i’m sacrificing my ability to hear by the end of the night all for you. but i can’t promise my driving won’t be extra shitty ‘cuz of it.”

she just grins, dumping the rifle in her arms on the table unceremoniously. “bring it on. i could use a near-death experience at the hands of someone other than a cultist.”

what a woman. “you won’t regret it. i mean, you might, and so might some cows and shit and whoever else is on the road right now, but it’ll be somethin’. get us the hell away from here for a while.”

her shoulders slump just the slightest bit, and he can’t tell if that’s a good or bad sign. “yeah. no, you’re right - i need it.” she surges forward, patting him hard on the back and pausing in the doorway. “we’re not taking my truck, obviously.”

he sputters again. “hah - i ain’t that stupid.”

[kimryes]

hello hello im here to petition u for more eli, since u did such a cute fic with him and addison a while back :> (maybe he got hurt in the deputys ‘only you’ rampage, and they feel bad and are mother henning around the him at the wolf’s den because of it?)

oops i kind of deviated from the ‘mother henning’ bit and made this sadder than u probably wanted it but i hope u still like it

The liberation of the mountains was marked by a somber event. How could it be anything else, after all? What was there to really celebrate with their numbers so thinned out, when their cheers would be drowned out by wailing of wolves and ghosts? The militia couldn’t push aside their pain, even for one night - Jacob may have died, but Eden’s Gate still had its parasitic tendrils latched onto the heart of Hope County. So the troops rallied, they cheered only for the swift and lethal justice they were going to deliver to the rest of the cult, and they lit a bonfire for the lost - nothing left to do but have a beer or two and get back to work.

Rook heard the footsteps shuffling back inside the Wolf’s Den beyond the door, but they didn’t move from their place at Eli’s side. A bit of dramatic irony, that - they’d been avoiding him like the plague ever since their brainwashed rampage nearly killed him, but an ill-timed mission to the base only for Tammy to insist they look after him because everyone was going up the mountain for a bit sealed their fate. They felt like a loaded gun next to him, just having to sit and watch as he slept, so vulnerable like this. Sitting in silence was bad enough, nothing to distract them as they flashed back to Jacob taunting them as Eli’s body was suspended in mid-air, the longest few seconds of their life when Tammy and Wheaty assumed he was dead until they found his weak pulse persisting, ‘only you could have gotten this close’…

The noise, however, meant he would wake up. And when he woke up, he would have to see them - the face of the person whom he once held, kissed, woke up in the morning next to, and then attacked him with the intent to kill. Rook wasn’t ready to witness the dawning horror and heartbreak in his eyes - they didn’t think they ever would be.

They were already getting up from the chair by the time Tammy came in, blinking repeatedly at the sight of Rook already raring to go. “Any problems?”

“No, out like a light. Listen though, I should really get going, I just wanted to–”

“Hey.” Tammy stepped forward, gripping Rook’s wrist. “Eli knows this wasn’t your fault. Getting to wake up to you would help.”

Rook swallowed hard, gaze drifting down to the floor. “Would it?”

“Yes.” She huffed, shaking her head as she released them. “Look, do what you want - I get how hard this is. But at least he’s still alive. He’s right here, and he’s going to be okay. You can’t avoid him forever - unless you really want to break his heart.” She gave them a hard look before turning to leave, shutting the door behind her. As expected, the force of it caused him to stir, and Rook scrambled to sit back down and just let their worst fears come true. After all, weren’t they broken already?

Eli didn’t say anything when his eyes first opened, darting around and adjusting to their surroundings. As he tried to sit up, Rook instinctively reached out and adjusted his pillows. To their surprise, he chuckled as he struggled, until he was upright enough to be comfortable. “It’s alright, it’s alright, gotta be able to do it on my own sooner or later.” When he finally turned his full attention on them, his breath left him in a sudden, audible whoosh. “Hey.”

Rook bit their bottom lip. “Hey.”

He nodded slowly, a question in his mind seemingly answered. “I’ve heard bits and pieces about what went down at Jacob’s bunker with your friend Pratt. Think he even came by to visit me once - now there’s someone who needs to be resting.”

Rook cracked the barest hint of a smile over what popped into their head. You’ll get out of that bed over my dead body. They kept their mouth shut, though - not exactly tactful to put it in terms like that. It wasn’t tactful to be here at all, they reminded themself. “He’ll be fine. You both will.”

“But will you be, Rook?” He sighed. Rook almost laughed - even in the state he was in, he was still able to see right through them. “Are you fine?”

“What do you think?” Their voice came out shakier than they could control. “You’re here because of me. And yeah, Jacob did this, whatever - that doesn’t change that it was me.”

He didn’t have the energy to debate them - they knew that. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to do what he could - stubborn bastard. “I should have known better, alright? I shouldn’t have just–” He had to take a break, catch his breath and organize his thoughts in the jumbled mess his mind must have been. “Whatever Jacob did… playing one lousy ‘deconditioning’ tape wasn’t going to undo all that bullshit. And all those times you disappeared… I could have–”

Rook’s instincts took over and they grabbed his hand, bringing it up to their face. “We both could’ve done things differently.” Tentatively, they brushed their lips over his knuckles. “But it’s in the past, and you’ve gotta relax.”

“You’re right. It is.” He took their other hand, rubbing his thumb over their tendons. “So… I’m hoping you won’t run away again when I tell you I don’t blame you.”

Rook breathed in shakily, wishing they had a hand free to quickly wipe away the tears that were gathering in their eyes. “I want to.”

Eli let out a long sigh, a sigh that must have been born of years of tension and strife. “I know. I don’t blame you for that, either.”

He wasn’t as convincing this time. Rook wanted so badly to be honest - to tell him they couldn’t look at his face for too long without seeing it frozen in pain, couldn’t feel his skin without remembering how cold it had become, couldn’t go to sleep without being haunted by his fearful ‘no no no don’t shoot!’. And they would, one day, because their relationship would certainly no longer have a future if they couldn’t be honest. But these weren’t the sort of things Eli needed to hear when he was on the mend. What he needed was love, patience, and for Rook to be there.

And they’d be damned if they couldn’t at least try.

They get up from the chair only so they could lean over and kiss him gently, both hands still in his grasp. “As much as I want to leave, I want to stay more.”

He squeezed their hands with as much strength as he could muster - not much, but it was something. “I’ll take it.”

Rook chuckled as they sat back down, and they lapsed into comfortable silence dotted with idle conversation whenever their thoughts began to drift back to the miserable. Tonight was supposed to be about celebrating the lost, but… well, Rook was far too busy celebrating the living instead.

[kimryes]

yet another fic for @falls-end featuring her girl addison - this time with eli bc he needs to be kissed v badly

Addison’s got that smile on her face - that wily determined one Eli had come to know all too well while working with her. She wore it when she came down into the base tonight, wore it all through cajoling him into treading up the stairs and out into the night for the first time in a while, and still wears it now that they’re sitting in the bed of her truck. He knows it’s obvious how uncomfortable he is - his constant fidgeting, eyes darting around at the trees.

The truth is, his heart has always been out here, going with every member of the Whitetail Militia who risk their lives trying to loosen Jacob’s chokehold on the mountains. Of course, that didn’t change the fact that he got to - no, chose to - stay safe (for now) in the bunker, condemned to only watch and give orders over the radio. The guilt gets to him just as much as every lost life. Tammy always makes a very convincing case as to why this is where he belongs, being the leader means staying alive so he can lead - but it never helps 100%.

“Hey.” Addison passes him her bottle of whiskey, smiling waning ever so slightly. “You’re thinkin’ too much. Didn’t bring ya up here for that.”

“Yeah?” He takes a swig; it burns as he swallows, but it grounds him. “You know something, I don’t think you really said why you were dragging my ass out of the bunker - you just did it.”

“Yeah, but you let me.” Huh; she has him there. “You’re not the only one who’s got too much on their shoulders, ya know. I just think… I dunno, we both just need to take some time to stay out here. Breathe in fresh air when nothin’s on fire. Appreciate the beauty of what we’re savin’, ya know?”

He has to smile at that. Leave it up to the park ranger to wax poetic about the nature all around him. Preserving the forest had been one of his main goals when he first started up the militia, but that seems so long ago now (hell, he barely had a beard then). He’d mostly given up on it by now - saving more lives and supplies is obviously worth more than saving trees. Still, it’s always at the back of his mind. Now that it’s at the forefront again, his guilt only worsens.

He takes another swig. “I think it’s more for you than it is for me, Addy.”

The smile finally drops from her face, and he finds himself missing it. The look of concern is one he gets all too often from others - he doesn’t need it from her too. “God, you’re stubborn as shit.” He barks out a laugh, despite himself, as she crawls over to sit next to him. “Fine then, don’t think about the pines and how clear and pretty all them stars are up there. But might I remind you that the hatch to the base ain’t even twenty feet away from us and you’ve yet to leave.” She smirks at him as she presses herself against his side, resting her head on his shoulder.

This isn’t the first time they’ve been close like this, affectionate, but he still tenses up instinctively. “Just because I’m not here for the nature... doesn’t mean I’m not here for the company.”

She winds her arm through his. “Oh? Didn’t realize the whiskey was that good.” He snorts softly, setting the bottle aside so he can rest his hand on her knee. “Maybe I’m just here for the company too.”

He smiles softly, letting his head fall against hers. There’s an urge to tease her, something about going against the creedo of her job, but he keeps it to himself for now. Maybe, in the not-so-distant future, there will come a time when he can go outside of his own free will and just be. Stare off into the night sky, shoulders not so weighed down - maybe that Eli Palmer can tease more easily, too. But all he has is who he is now, and that man’s had more than enough for one day.

“Stop thinkin’,” she chastises him again, but she punctuates this one with a kiss to the corner of his mouth. Huh; amazing how easily that worked.

“I suppose I can.” He turns towards her ever so slightly so he can kiss her full on, and as he does, he sees the stars in her eyes.