Ernest and Larry: start dating while teens-late twenties, mostly out of convenience because they didn’t see any other option. puppy love. as Ernest slowly joined the firestarters, he began to blame Larry for firefighter activities. Larry becomes an easy punching bag, and the relationship slowly becomes Incredibly Toxic. Larry still trusts him despite all instincts. explains the boiling scene and lack of fear in his eyes. guess this would also be where they began to explore BDSM, most likely in not-so-healthy headspaces. Ernest was a Not Good man.
Ernest and Bertrand: in his later twenties/early thirties, possibly overlapping with Beatrice and Bertrand’s marriage. “special friends,” always on the cusp of a relationship. Ernest desperately fell for Bertrand and naively hoped it would work out. Bertrand, obviously, would never let it. Bertrand always thought it was a fun time and that they were on the same page. When Ernest found out about the engagement he was devestated. Helped confirm his beliefs that firefighters are manipulative, but it dampered his feelings of insurgence. He’s tired.
Ernest and Fernald: late 30s/now (early 40s) started as a relationship out of convenience, very off and on given how little time they spend with each other. Fernald is almost 10 years younger than Ernest, and Ernest sees a lot of himself in the man. Over time they grew infatuated. Started incredibly unhealthy as a way to work out their unhappy feelings about the firestarters, but slowly developed into a place of love and support they need. See each other even less regularly than Dewey and Kit seeing as though the hotel is “majority firefighter.” they’re in love but won’t admit it.
au where the denouements start an inn on some remote coast and Fernald and Ernest are happy and also Fiona is there as is Carmelita, ernest’s adopted brat daughter who has slowly been learning how to act like a reasonable being.
hi! thanks for asking, any excuse to talk about these two <3 under the cut because i got carried away and it’s kinda long
who’s better at disguising their tattoo(s) and helping the other person do it?
Larry is a little better at it, because he can stay focused on it longer and pays more attention to details. He also specialises in making sure he blends in and goes unnoticed, so he has more experience with covering up anything noticeable. Ernest usually lets him help cover his up, but tends to distract him by kissing him whilst he’s doing it
who deliberately misspells words / uses wrong grammar in letters to each other as some code even when the situation doesn’t require it and does it just for fun?
Ernest is a menace about this. His philosophy is that if VFD are going to make them learn all these codes, he’s going to be annoying about it. He sends grammatically incoherent flirty messages to Larry, who is exasperated but also pretty charmed.
who’s better at navigating through the city’s tunnels?
When they’re younger, Ernest. He has strong navigational skills and he’s very good at picking up on subtle clues. Also, Frank insisted he actually bothered to learn it. But by the time they’re both grown adults, Ernest spends most of his time cooped up in the hotel whilst Larry’s out on missions and regularly running around the tunnels, so he knows it a little better and Ernest has lost his touch
who climbs an elevator shaft faster?
Ernest. The brothers are all very athletic and Ernest has had to climb a ridiculous number of elevator shafts for reasons spanning from fire-starting missions to hotel shenanigans. Larry tends to just be disguised and observing.
who’s better at lock picking?
Larry. Ernest has a master key for anywhere in the hotel, and in other places he tends to just break a window or kick the door to get in. Larry’s a little more subtle and chooses to pick the lock.
who would steal more belongings of the other person if they ever breakup and what would they each steal?
It’s not stealing as such, but Larry has one of Ernest’s jumpers from before they broke up and he never gives it back. Likewise, Ernest hangs onto one of Larry’s books. They both know the other has these things, but they don’t ask for it back because they’re stubborn and don’t want to talk
who insists on putting a series of elaborate fake locks on the door to look impressive but it could actually be open easily with one action?
Ernest because he lives for the drama. Larry eggs him on a little whilst they’re still on the same side, because he thinks it’s funny, but Ernest is the one that keeps doing it around the hotel. Guests are perplexed. Frank is stressed.
who successfully converts the other person into loving their favorite drink or neither of them does?
They both have an effect on each other. Ernest gets into the habit of putting more sugar in his tea because he’s used to making it for Larry, and eventually just decides he likes it like that. Larry will occasionally get black coffee because Ernest does, but he doesn’t exactly love it.
which one of them drives more and what’s their driving style?
The fandom seems to have a consensus that Larry is the gay who can’t drive, and I don’t even want to argue with that. Ernest drives more and follows no one’s rules but his own. He doesn’t crash through hedges like Kit because he doesn’t want to damage the car, but he’ll definitely waste no time getting where he wants to be. The only exception is when Larry’s in the car. He knows driving makes him anxious, so he tends to mostly behave, though he’ll still push the limits.
which weapons do they each like to carry?
Larry doesn’t really carry weapons and prefers to talk his way out of things. If absolutely necessary, he’ll have a knife and some kind of tranquiliser. Usually, he’ll just find something useful wherever he is. Ernest usually has rope (oof) and matches. The hotel also has collections of swords and knives and he’ll sometimes sneak one away if he’s confident his brothers won’t notice.
when going undercover together, what disguises are their favorite to use?
Larry tends to be using his waiter disguise, so Ernest will usually blend in with that somehow. Posh restaurant-goer, manager, angry customer. If they’re out somewhere else, Ernest likes the boat captain disguise because it means he bears no resemblance to his brothers for a bit. Larry quite likes the newlywed couple disguises.
what is each other their first choice of outfit when attending a masked ball?
Larry usually has to work these (Ernest sulks a lot about that) so he’s in the standard waiter uniform of the red suit and bowtie we saw in the flashback. Ernest will find something to complement it, usually a sharp black suit with a red tie or something similar. He sometimes gets made to dress the same as his brothers, but he’ll sneak something matching in there.
Happy Valentine’s day! i dug through my planning document for The Crooked Kind (wow tabby, your self-promo is really subtle) and found two vaguely romantic scenes I cut because they didn’t fit the overall tone of the story or Frank’s perspective on it. Now seems as good a time as any to share them! Very short Lernest and Kewey scenes under the cut.
From age 15, chronologically after Ernest comes out
Frank has always done his best to keep Ernest’s secrets for him, no matter how dreadful they may be, so it’s almost a relief that the biggest thing he’s currently hiding is that Ernest has a boyfriend. He’s not an idiot. He knows VFD discourages them having relationships- it’s distracting and dangerous, but he isn’t sure what they’ll do to stop them.
Whatever they would do, Ernest is trusting him to keep his secret, so he will.
It’s rather interesting to look in on their group with this little morsel of knowledge. He catches more details now, flashes of Ernest’s life he might never have noticed before. The way Ernest sits closer to Larry so that their shoulders are touching and their knees must be too should have been a dead giveaway, as well as the small uptick of a smile at the edge of his mouth when Larry is talking, a far cry from his usual wide grin that doesn’t always reach his eyes.
Ernest whispers to them one night that he loves him, and Dewey laughs a little nervously like it’s the biggest thing they’ve ever been entrusted with. It sometimes feels that way.
--------
From age ??, chronologically after the hotel is opened
He doesn’t like to admit how emotionally invested he is in Dewey’s life, but with Ernest burning houses and his bridges, Frank is starting to rely on his youngest brother for some kind of vicarious life more than either of them necessarily like.
(The irony of living vicariously through a person who is legally dead strikes him many times, but he chooses to ignore it.)
Dewey is everything Ernest was supposed to be, and everything Frank wishes he was. He is kind and smart and brave. Whatever qualms he has about VFD, he never turns on them. This is probably why Kit loves him.
It’s painful for Dewey to live like this, unable to show his relationship or even go out on proper dates with her. There are moments when the strain shows and Frank sees utter exhaustion and pain in his little brother’s eyes when Kit leaves the hotel on another mission and he returns to his secret library alone.
Frank loves his brother and respects Kit Snicket immensely, however much her blasé attitude to life and death continues to astound him, so he does what he can to ease the pain. He clears halls and dining rooms for them, inventing meetings that aren’t happening so they can spend time together above ground, has concierges send messages from ‘him’ back and forth, sometimes even lets Dewey step into his shoes and go out with Kit, provided they don’t do anything Frank wouldn’t.
It’s the best he can offer and Dewey comes back a little brighter each time.
