For the fandoms/fans who mourn their idol/hero. ❤
Word count 1,444
I was moved to say something before I force myself to get back up and fight to enjoy race week again. So many men and women in the Formula family will do the same. 🏎❤🏁🥰
Dear anyone who feels the loss over a human being they idolized with love,
I can't help but to try and offer some type of hope while we forever mourn the death of of our idols. Our personal heroes. No matter who they are, how they died, how they lived, if we met them, if we never met them, if they didn't know we loved them or if they did...😔
So many of us are told by the very people we are closest to that we should just get over it! They say all the above, more or less. They try to "encourage us" by stating the obvious. You didn't know them. You'll be over it tomorrow. Sometimes they say nothing at all.
Perhaps you have people in your life that don't even know your suffering with such deep pain. We can't explain our tears, sadness, anger, loneliness or whatever were feeling and that is so much harder than being able to attend a funeral for our loss. At least we wouldn't have to hide the way we feel. They wouldn't ask us what our deal is. They wouldn't question why we feel the way we feel. We would be given a short window to openly grieve their death. Our loss. We might be given the shot at closure if this was the case. We could somehow feel we got to say goodbye!
I still mourn the death of my idol. My hero! This person saved me and still saves me this very moment as I try to write this painfully and hopefully helpful recognition for us fandoms/fans in real pain with our loss.
I spent whatever hours I could hidden away from the world. Buried in the hours of footage on YouTube or wherever. I listened to my hero's voice, laugh, seen my hero still ALIVE! I went through every social media platform that exists, desperate for just one more moment. It took a hard solid year before I even felt like healing.
For the longest time I was so mad at the world! My hero's death wasn't a graceful one so the coverage was cruel at times. That enraged me! The footage/pictures of their deaths are now so very public and that is hard to swallow. Even death certificates are made public! Like where is the humanity? I remember asking why hasn't the world stopped for one minute to see it's lost some of its brightest light?!?
Our heroes were more than entertainers, athletes, artists...they were what got us through. Gave us hope and love when we didn't have any. They helped us to escape for whatever time we had with them. They have grown over the years with us. Some we only knew a short time but their beautiful light was SO powerful it caught our attention in the fog of life. Some taught us lessons in strength and courage. Some showed us they survived the same hell we survived. Some guided us to grow physically or mentally. They ALWAYS offered us an escape when we needed it. Most of all they were there when we needed them. EVERY time we needed them...
So now what world? You want us to move on? You want us to accept their fate and take whoever or whatever you offer to replace them?
They gave us so much more than we can ever explain. Some of us didn't know any of this until they were gone and they can never be replaced! So leave us to heal the ONLY way we can!
Lastly to us, the fans. The ones who hold in our pain because we have no real way of saying goodbye to our heroes…..
I'm sorry for your loss. It's been over two years since I lost my hero and there are times when I have to say goodbye again and again because *"Sometimes you don't say goodbye once. You say goodbye over and over and OVER again. I get tackled by the grief at times that I would least expect." * Every year another birthday passes. The anniversary of their death comes. All of a sudden there's a surge of our heroes faces. Forcing us to remember the moment they were taken from our lives. And then there are times when it seems no one remembers them. Your left wondering if your the only fan left with a whole in your chest? And it's another ride on the emotional rollercoaster! I wish I could tell you that while moving forward you won't know pain like that again but I didn't write this to sugarcoat lies. The fact is you might coast through a memory and smile. You grow with the pain. It's another scar but you do keep pushing! You might find yourself in the middle of a completely different realm of happiness and experience yet another loss. One that triggers your heroes loss and that pain claws its way towards the surface to greet this new loss like it was meant to be friends all along and it's not fair to feel this pain again!
You can get through this loss and you don't have to be alone!
If you have friends with this hero in common or belong to a fandom that can share your pain, please reach out! When I lost my hero I found a person in my area who was brave enough to start a Facebook group of support by herself. I found my place to mourn my hero with a hashtag that lit the way. This support group has been my only outlet when I'm hurting the most for my hero. And when remembering my hero is too much I take a break. I drop by and leave my emotions or thoughts and I see the other fans who also loved this person doing the same and it truly helps. I guess it's a virtual memorial for us who will never forget. I can leave my honest feelings in a safe space and seek other social media outlets to lighten my spirit. It's just my way of moving forward from the days I didn't want to move at all. It's my way of honoring my hero.
The only good I can possibly think for having an idol/hero with wings is that you are not alone! Someone in this world feels what you are feeling and when your ready, I hope you can help each other.
Feel free to reach out to me. Feel free to reblog and add your hero for me to know because they matter and so do you!
Hugz from my broken soul to yours!
Who cares if one more light goes out? I do.
My personal hero is Chester Bennington of Linkin Park. 🌠
My heart is re-shattered from the loss we are feeling in Formula ones racing family 8/31/19.
My inspiration came across Spotify as I scrolled through Instagram, Twitter and tumblr feeling all of our pain. So many on tumblr are being honest about the way this loss has affected them and I wanted to reach out before a new race week starts and something inside of you won't feel right. 😔
Take your time. Come back to the race family when your ready. Take a walk with some music in your ears to let out the feels. Take care of you!
Rest in Paradise to all our heroes. 🌠
One More Light
Song by Linkin Park
Should've stayed, were there signs, I ignored?
Can I help you, not to hurt, anymore?
We saw brilliance, when the world, was asleep
There are things that we can have, but can't keep
If they say
Who cares if one more light goes out?
In a sky of a million stars
It flickers, flickers
Who cares when someone's time runs out?
If a moment is all we are
We're quicker, quicker
Who cares if one more light goes out?
Well I do
The reminders pull the floor from your feet
In the kitchen, one more chair than you need oh
And you're angry, and you should be, it's not fair
Just 'cause you can't see it, doesn't mean it, isn't there
If they say
Who cares if one more light goes out?
In a sky of a million stars
It flickers, flickers
Who cares when someone's time runs out?
If a moment is all we are
We're quicker, quicker
Who cares if one more light goes out?
Well I do
Who cares if one more light goes out?
In a sky of a million stars
It flickers, flickers
Who cares when someone's time runs out?
If a moment is all we are
We're quicker, quicker
Who cares if one more light goes out?
Well I do!
