#linguistic shitpost

[prototumblinguist]

matrix clause...mother clause...mama clause...mrs. clause?!?!?!

[vaticinatrix]

okay so like. in my brain i know that there’s gonna be a lot of similarity between hillbilly accents and irish and scottish accents. like yeah. duh. lots of irish and scottish immigrants ended up settled in appalachia. but something about hearing colm mcguinness pronounce “fire” the same way my hillbilly-ass family does was jarring

[anhedoniacity]

me: why does no one ever understand what I say the first time I say it

also me: *multilingual muttering*

[plagueofsquid]

Fun Fact

In Chinese, it's very common to add emphasis by just tacking on the phrase 'to death'. For example, if you're hungry you might say 'I'm starving to death!', or you can be 'scared of (something) to death'. And yes, you can kill someone to death.

[anhedoniacity]

tag yourself as misfortunate daughters of variously inane white women

Bambeigh “no, honey, you can’t join soccer, we’ve talked about this. soccer is for boys and you are a sweet innocent princess”

Ngweigh “Africa is so exotic, I love the culture. did you know I had a layover in Zambia once”

Muesleigh “go vegan”

Harleigh “shut up about that biker dude I dated right out of college, I’m over him goddamn it”

Yangtzeigh “Asia is so exotic, I love the culture. did you know I had a layover in China—“

Sonneigh “Sonny told me he’s— I mean she’s transgender, so I’m having her birth certificate updated as a surprise! isn’t this exciting?”

Tomographeigh “yeah I was just inspired when I saw the ultrasound”

Nareigh “you’re pronouncing the r wrong— oh my god I’m not a fucking weeaboo, it’s KOREAN it means LILY and I put my own TWIST on it”

Lileigh “I thought about naming my daughter Na-ri, you know, meaning lily in Korean? But I realized people would have made fun of that, I could never”

Nestleigh “they’re giving me five thousand dollars a year until she’s eighteen. it was worth it ok”

Emmaleigh “what if her name was, like, my name, but with a red squiggly line under it in microsoft word”

Cherokeigh “why do you all hate me what did I do”

[anhedoniacity]

the funniest thing: replacing verbs that should obviously be transitive with the intransitive form (i.e. subject was —ed) to add an air of intrigue and general ambiguity to everything you say

[plagueofsquid]

Dio's name in Chinese is written the same as Dior. Yes, the French fashion company.

[anhedoniacity]

since the word “wealth” is derived from the word “weal” (pronounced like “wheel” and historically meaning prosperity), we need to either 1. start pronouncing it as “weelth” OR 2. introduce a noun form of weal’s antonym (woe): woeth. we don’t necessarily need to do both of these things, but doing at least one is essential