I’ve received an unexpected e-mail
[ 2017-05-12 13:40:02 , LIPHLICH OFFICIAL BLOG TRANSLATION ]
(//Notes at the beginning this time. This is all ONE long blog post, not several. It took me several days to translate.
-Throughout the entire post, the word hentai is used repeatedly. This can mean pervert/weirdo, but is also just used for hentai manga and such, so I simply use it how it fits the sentence. I mention this because you need to be aware that it is the same word.
-The scene from The Castle of Cagliostro that Kuga talks about can be found here.
-The story in the post parodies one of the most famous Japanese fairytales, Momotarō. Watch an English version here if you like.
-Fuji Pro - Fuji Productions is the company LIPHLICH is associated with.
Also gestaltzerfall seems to be a phenomenon when you stare at two kanji and can’t remember how to read them..? Or something of the like. Probably Ggerman in origin.//)
____
Unchanging as always
It was an evening without anything
I was immersed in work
When you’re working, there are times when you’re nervous, but also times when you concentrate intensely on the incoming stuff
This time I was concentrating
Unchanging as always
It was an evening without anything
The sender is our office manager
It’s a work e-mail, so I stop working and check the contents
If I am to say what kinda e-mail it was,
The subject was the title of the exclusive pick-up bonus for the Jishuban Club CD shop
for our next new single “Youki na nowaaru” that comes out in summer
Or rather, I was only sent the “title” of the bonus
Below↓↓↓ I quote without alteration
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“Hentaitarō/Pervert Tarō“
Once upon a time, in some place, old man Fuji Pro lived in Shinjuku.
Old man Fuji Pro was introduced by a friend of his to some young men.
Then when the old man Fuji Pro went to meet up with them, a huge hentai came floating by.
“Oh my, this is some good hentai”
The old man Fuji Pro picked the hentai up and carried it home.
So, the old man Fuji Pro tried and tried to talk to the hentai, when all of a sudden, a fine, energetic pervert sprung out of it.
“This can be no other than a pervert given to me by God!”
The old man, who had no pervs of his own, was delighted.
The old man named the pervert that was born out of the hentai Hentaitarō.
Hentaitarō grew quickly, and soon became a strong pervert.
And so one day, Hentaitarō said.
“I’m gonna pervily put on some pervy clothes or something, and go to Onigashima to stand on stage”
Somebody made some pervy clothes for him, and he set out for Onigashima.
On his way, he met a person with weird hair called Kobayashi Takaaki.
“Mr. Hentaitarō, where are you going?”
"I’m going to Onigashima to stand on stage”
“Then, please give me one pervy outfit you carry attached to your waist. I’ll go with you.”
Kobayashi Takaaki received the pervy outfit, and followed Hentaitarō on his way.
Next, he met Black-rimmed Glasses.
"Mr. Hentaitarō, where are you going?”
"I’m going to Onigashima to stand on stage”
“Then, please give me one pervy outfit you carry attached to your waist. I’ll go with you.”
After that, he met a pheasant.
"Mr. Hentaitarō, where are you going?”
"I’m going to Onigashima to stand on stage”
“Well, I’ll leave that to you, I don’t know much about that”
And so, Hentaitarō and the friends he’d made, Kobayashi Takaaki and Black-rimmed Glasses, finally made it to Onigashima.
On Onigashima, the oni were in the middle of drinking while sorting through treasure stolen from a nearby village.
"Look at me!”
Hentaitarō was grinning broadly for some reason, Kobayashi Takaaki was playing a taiko drum, and Black-rimmed Glasses was selling CDs intensively.
So Hentaitarō, grinning broadly and looking all weird, went berserk on them.
Eventually, the boss of the oni went, “We’re defeated, we’re defeated, this is it, somebody help”, apologizing with his hands clasped together.
Hentaitarō, Kobayashi Takaaki and Black-rimmed Glasses quickly loaded up on treasure they took from the oni, and made it home healthy and well.
When old man Fuji Pro saw Hentaitarō’s weird appearance, he had an indescribable expression.
And so Hentaitarō lived happily ever after thanks to the treasure and his pervy clothes.
The end
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The manager wrote a few words at the end
“I want you to ponder it”
“I want you to return my power of concentration”
As I desist from trying to reply, I think a bit
Want me to …. ponder it………. ?
It’s been a while too since I’d gone on parroting something in my head like that
Thoughts are suspended when people come across something that passes over their understanding
※Ponder (verb): to think about a thing really well until it becomes clear
So to make Hentaitarō all clear, let’s speculate with thoughts deeper than the sea, ha-ha (smacks a hand on a shoulder)
In other words, what I want to say
I’ll swallow these few words like I drink up my black coffee
It’s hard, seems to be all weird, all like gestaltzerfall
It’s just become a little interesting
O~ka~y, let’s sort out the characters
・Old man Fuji Pro = the person who sent this e-mail, the manager
・It goes without saying that Hentaitarō is Shindō Wataru
・Kobayashi Takaaki is the same Kobayashi Takaaki
・Black-rimmed Glasses is the shop manager of Jishuban Club
・The pheasant… it acts like it doesn’t want to go against public order, so it would be just a person with regular morals
From the pheasant’s dialogue we can read
“Well, I’ll leave that to you, I don’t know much about that”
I don’t know much about that
It’s strange to say that
Takky seems to fit the pheasant
Soo for now I will attempt a liberal ‘translation’
It seems to be a dramatization of a true story
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“Hentaitarō/Pervert Tarō“
Once upon a time, in some place, old man Fuji Pro lived in Shinjuku.
↑
From the beginning we’re introduced to the story with a contradiction
Its grip is excellent
It was around summer~autumn 2011 or so, our manager was in Shinjuku
The story is introduced like this
Old man Fuji Pro was introduced by a friend of his to some young men.
↑
These young men are LIPHLICH at that time
Yesyes, through the introduction of a third party, we met with the manager for the first time
It’s a nostalgic story
Then when the old man Fuji Pro went to meet up with them, a huge hentai came floating by.
↑
Yep, suddenly abandoned everyone but Wataru-kun〜☆
Tumble~ tumble~ no turn for me〜♪
“Oh my, this is some good hentai”
The old man Fuji Pro picked the hentai up and carried it home.
↑
Yes yes
Our diligent talk ended after nearly an hour, and I can still remember to this day how fidgety Wataru-kun became afterwards
I’ve become accustomed to it already, but both his looks and verbal expression were really weird for sure
He’ll become a good perv,I was convinced
Some pervert clairvoyance
So, the old man Fuji Pro tried and tried to talk to the hentai, when all of a sudden, a fine, energetic pervert sprung out of it.
↑
Somehow a Shindō Wataru came out of a Shindō Wataru… and
I’m trying to understand it but I can’t at all
It’s really a thought maze - labyrinth - horror hentai - like a matryoshka
“This can be no other than a pervert given to me by God!”
The old man, who had no pervs of his own, was delighted.
↑
It was like that
The old man named the pervert that was born out of the hentai Hentaitarō.
↑
It was like that
Hentaitarō grew quickly, and soon became a strong pervert.
↑
This is from 2011 until circa 2013 I think
I remember the time when the perv became strong for sure
It was a time when everyone was training to level up
That hasn’t changed to this day, but at that time it was really frantic
And so one day, Hentaitarō said.
“I’m gonna pervily put on some pervy clothes or something, and go to Onigashima to stand on stage”
↑
Huh
Somebody made some pervy clothes for him, and he set out for Onigashima.
↑
Huh!!!!
On his way, he met a person with weird hair called Kobayashi Takaaki.
"Mr. Hentaitarō, where are you going?”
"I’m going to Onigashima to stand on stage”
“Then, please give me one pervy outfit you carry attached to your waist. I’ll go with you.”
Kobayashi Takaaki received the pervy outfit, and followed Hentaitarō on his way.
↑
2016, Kobayan joined
It summarizes the events from around then nicely
First companion
Next, he met Black-rimmed Glasses.
"Mr. Hentaitarō, where are you going?”
"I’m going to Onigashima to stand on stage”
“Then, please give me one pervy outfit you carry attached to your waist. I’ll go with you.”
↑
Suddenly the store managed from Jishuban Club gets involvedーーーー!!!!
Second companion
After that, he met a pheasant.
"Mr. Hentaitarō, where are you going?”
"I’m going to Onigashima to stand on stage”
“Well, I’ll leave that to you, I don’t know much about that”
↑
The person who honors pubblic morals disguised as the third companion
In this whole wide world, there are people who can not become friends no matter what you do
It can’t be helped
When depicting these conflicting things like that, the story gains depth
It is successful
Compared to JOJO’s 5th series, it’s Pannacota Fugo
And so, Hentaitarō and the friends he’d made, Kobayashi Takaaki and Black-rimmed Glasses, finally made it to Onigashima.
↑
Yepyep
Seems the story progresses towards the next stage
On Onigashima, the oni were in the middle of drinking while sorting through treasure stolen from a nearby village.
"Look at me!
↑
Really, he’s such a guy
“Look at me!” is a strong like that reveals Hentaitarō’s character in just a few words
In order to draw the reader’s attention, there must be an instance of him going wild like that
Di・le・m・ma
Hentaitarō was grinning broadly for some reason, Kobayashi Takaaki was playing a taiko drum, and Black-rimmed Glasses was selling CDs intensively.
↑
Everyone’s doing what they should be doing to the best of their ability
It’s the base for every party that sets out on an adventure
Hentaitarō’s laughing with a grin
I wonder if it was said in Dragon Quest, whether a gadabout would have a speech frame like that
So Hentaitarō, grinning broadly and looking all weird, went berserk on them.
↑
Go Hentaitarō! (Don’t you play bass though)
Eventually, the boss of the oni went, “We’re defeated, we’re defeated, this is it, somebody help”, apologizing with his hands clasped together.
Hentaitarō, Kobayashi Takaaki and Black-rimmed Glasses quickly loaded up on treasure they took from the oni, and made it home healthy and well.
↑
Hentaitarō’s strength knows no limits! (I can understand perfectly how defeated the oni felt)
When old man Fuji Pro saw Hentaitarō’s weird appearance, he had an indescribable expression.
↑
This is a very important part
And I can sympathize with old man Fuji Pro a lot
Expressed in animation, the part at the end where the famous scene comes
This face that the old man Fuji Pro made when he couldn’t say anything was, in other words, like this
It’s similar to the last famous scene from The Castle of Cagliostro
Inspector: “Lupin managed to steal something again☆”
Clarisse: “No, that person didn’t steal anything~”
Inspector: “No, he stole something quite extraordinary”
Clarisse: “???”
Inspector: “Your heart☆”
※Clarisse makes a really nice face
“Yes❤︎”
That famous scene that everyone knows
There many people will think, “Certainly!”, I presume
The face that Clarisse made when she said her “Yes❤︎” and the face that old man Fuji Pro made may be completely different, but their essence seems similar
And so Hentaitarō lived happily ever after thanks to the treasure and his pervy clothes.
↑
Final conclusion
We have arrived to it, so
wonderful wonderful
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So in other words, the title was
The magnificent history that condensed the six years from when Hentaitarō and old man Fuji Pro first met, up until now
As one would expect from a Jishuban Club bonus (I can’t understand the contents completely )
But thinking back upon it
It resembles the first time I met up with Hentaitarō, too
At the time when I thought, ah, I really want an impactful member,
I met this person called Shindō Wataru
"Hey, this is some good pervert”
I thought of course … even ended up thinking it unconsciously
“This can be no other than a pervert given to me by God!”
I thought a bit like that
Thinking about it… This person, Shindō Wataru…, people need hentai somewhere in their hearts
To fill up this hole in the hearts of such people, as a messenger of God that flew down from the heavens, perhaps he’s a hentai angel
Oh, God
Thank you
For the perv that you made so well, that now plays bass by my side sometimes, all grinning
Come to think of it, God
This band of perverts, LIPHLICH, that you’ve made so well,
They’re planning on releasing a new single this summer, called Youki na nowaaru
..Also, God,
On July 23rd at a place called Ebisu LIQUIDROOM, with these well-made perverts we’re doing a oneman live called Noir Spectacle
We’re doing fastest priority admission for that live till May 14th
To say it precisely, it is accepted until May 14th, 23:59
When I met Hentaitarō, when I met old man Fuji Pro, when I met Takky, when I met Kobayan, when I met the store manager from Jishuban Club, when I met plenty other people, wherever I went they surely thought, “Oh, this is a huge weirdo, huge weirdo”
Today, keep going, Hentaitarō
I feel like I could feel truly deep love towards the Hentaitarō put into that title
Thank you, Hentaitarō
Best regards from here on too, Hentaitarō
This way or another, this is how I turned out writing this blog post