A Stark Absence - Chapter 23
Pairings: Tony Stark x OFC
A/N: Please see Masterpost for a note regarding this and upcoming chapters’ tags
It's been a long time, but like I said a couple days ago, I'm finally in a good enough place that I have the head space to hopefully do Tony and Ev justice. I'll still be slow to update, but I promise not to take two years ever again <3
Word Count: 3,049
Chapter 23 of ?
AO3
Runnin Down A Dream
Steve glanced over his shoulder at Natasha, “You sure this is it?”
“Same coords I always use,” she said, hurrying to his side in the cockpit. “Why?
Tony wondered what else could possibly go wrong as he pushed himself up out of his seat, pocketing the flask he’d brought along.
“It’s gone,” Nat breathed. “The report mentioned a fire but it didn’t say anything about…”
“What’s go-” Tony faltered, now seeing what the others could.
“The Hub. That was the Hub,” Natasha’s voice was soft, her eyes wandering over the charred landscape before them.
“Good thing she wasn’t there,” Tony said brusquely. “I’m suiting up. Let’s get down there and get this over with.”
Steve and Natasha exchanged a look of concern. Tony hadn’t taken the news well, they knew he wouldn’t. Neither had they, if they were being honest with themselves. But his refusal to accept Evelyn’s fate was only going to hurt him more the longer he denied it. None of them wanted to find what they’d come looking for, but at the same time… Maybe it would make things easier if they did. Maybe it would be easier on everyone if there was a chance for closure, a chance for grieving, for healing.
The trio walked silently from the Quinjet, towards what was left of the Hub. It had been a large facility, evident by the remnants of the foundation that stood among the ash. Tony berated himself for not sending his army of suits out to search for it the moment Evelyn mentioned it. If he’d known it was this large… It would have stood out. One of the suits would have found it. He could have intervened. He could have found her. He could have-
“I don’t know if there’s anything left here to find,” Steve said solemnly.
“Shut it, Rogers. Jarvis, start scanning. I want everything you can give me on this place. Even better if there’s satellite footage from the days leading up to, to this.”
“Of course, sir.”
Natasha stood at the edge of the destruction, and scooped up a handful of ashes. She gripped them in her fist, then let them scatter away through her fingers. “This was the backbone of SHIELD. All of our intel, all of our support, tech, it all came through here.”
“Never took you for the sentimental type,” Tony remarked, focused on the data streaming on his HUD.
She side-eyed Tony.
He tried not to think about anyone else. The number of people it would have required to be the backbone of SHIELD. The number of people that would have been going through another day of work when Hydra struck.
“Mapping analysis complete.”
“Project it.”
Before their eyes, the Hub seemed to come back to life; grand and imposing. Natasha stepped back as the green walls loomed before her. Steve came to her side, and placed a hand on her shoulder. Tony stayed where he was, unable to decide his next step.
“Area analysis complete.”
“And?” Tony asked, not wanting to hear the response.
“Most human remains are located at the back of the building, sir,” Jarvis said.
“And,” Tony pressed. Say she’s not there, say she’s not there…
“Many have no remaining means of identification. Those who do are at the bottom of the piles. However, no trace of Ms. Abel can be identified from the remains at this time.”
Tony closed his eyes, raised his face to the sky, and let out a long-held breath.
They walked around the charred remnants of the Hub, a somber air hanging over them. The piles Jarvis spoke of (and if Tony let himself recall, Romanoff had mentioned), were unceremonious pyres. Bodies laid upon bodies laid upon bodies, contourted, burned, unrecognizable. Steve put a hand over his mouth and nose; the smell of gasoline still lingered thickly in the air, and his stomach rolled at the sight.
“Monsters,” Natasha whispered.
Tony’s jaw clenched tightly.
Steve turned away, hands on his hips, eyes on the ground. “What do we do?”
“Jarvis said she’s not here. So we go home. We find her.”
“Tony…”
“She’s not here, Romanoff,” Tony said firmly as his helmet retracted. “That means she needs us.”
The demon’s breath was warm on Evelyn’s ear, her head dipped to the side, as she forced a smile at the departing group. She nearly caught Fitz’s eyebrows pinch together and his eyes dart to her right hand, but missed it when a cough and groan left the man behind her. She closed her eyes at Ward’s performance, fingers twitching to tap to her thumb. His bruises might be real, but the cause of them wasn’t.
“Make sure Abel rests up.
“I’ll show her to the barracks right now.”
Her eyes flew open, looking between Coulson and Koenig.
“Good. I think that hike from the bus must have taken more out of her than we thought.”
Evelyn had to bite her tongue. She wanted to pipe up, to say that she was fine, better than she seemed, but he was right; she was exhausted. But a decent, comfortable bed was all she really wanted. To say it had been a long day would be an understatement. Lying down and drifting off to sleep behind a locked door was all she could hope for.
“Nap time, darling?”
She squeezed her eyes shut and swallowed hard as she rolled her head back side to side, trying to conceal her reactions. This wasn’t the time or place for getting in a back and forth with the nightmare man.
“Evie,” Fitz said, his voice heavy with concern. He met her eyes briefly before he looked at her bare fingers again. “Where’s your-”
“Good idea,” she said, giving Coulson a weak smile. She could feel her heart begin to pick up the pace at the thoughts racing through her mind, at the decision she was about to make. She turned to Koenig. “A rest is exactly what I need.” A rest… A dream… Tony…
“Ready to join me, are you?”
She tried not to lean her head into the gleeful voice speaking into her ear, but Fitz caught her reflexive action easily.
“Sir, maybe Evelyn should come with us after all? Simmons can monitor her injuries and-”
“Simmons already made sure she has enough of her meds to get by until we get back, and said she’ll be fine until then. Abel’s staying. What she needs now is time in one place to rest and heal. She won’t get that out in the field with us.”
“But, sir-”
“Nice try, Fitz,” Ward interrupted. “I’ll keep a close eye on her. She’ll be fine.”
Looking somewhat placated, Fitz nodded. He looked worryingly at Evelyn one last time, flashed a feeble smile, and waved before boarding the Quinjet.
“Right this way, Miss Abel,” Koenig said, holding his arm out to indicate which way they’d be going.
Evelyn nodded and fell in step beside him.
“Hold on.” She froze at the sound of Ward’s voice. “I’ll go with you. Can’t keep an eye on you if I don’t know where you are.” He met her eyes with a smile that made her blood run cold.
What was he planning for her? Did he have a plan yet? Had he ever had a plan? Or would everything be set off when he found out Skye was able to hack the NSA satellites and see him and Garrett on the rooftop of the Fridge, working together to infiltrate the facility?
She returned his smile, but kept silent, leaning heavily into her exhaustion. She continued down the hall, sandwiched between Koenig and Ward. Doubtful voices quietly caught her ear, wishing the others luck and assurances that the tasks they were told to do would be finished before the team returned. This was all wrong, she thought. She shouldn’t be here for what would come next. But Coulson was following his heart, and she couldn’t fault him for it; she was about to follow hers.
“This is the first hall,” Koenig said as he stopped before a hall lined with doors that seemed to stretch on. “You can have your pick. I keep all of the rooms ready at all times in case a situation like this should arise. Never thought it would pay off.”
“Ok, I’ll-”
“You’ll take this one,” Ward ordered, opening the first door by his side. “It’s my job to keep you safe. That means I need to know where to find you.”
“Right,” Evelyn said with a stiff nod. “I’ll take this one.”
“Alright,” Koenig said uncomfortably. “Dinner’s at 6, we’ll see you then.”
“Thanks, but I’ll pass. I really just need to get some sleep.”
“You need to eat, your body needs fuel to heal,” Ward said, his order laced with kindness. “Don’t need Fitz worrying about you. I’ll bring you a tray.”
“Can’t argue with that,” Evelyn said with a shrug.
“I’ll leave it outside the door if you’re asleep.”
Evelyn gave what she hoped was a friendly, sleepy smile. “I appreciate it. I’m gonna go lay down.”
“Sweet dreams,” Ward said, watching her reaction closely.
But Evelyn didn’t give him one. She stepped in, closed the door gently behind her, then pressed her ear against it. The voices on the other side were heavily muffled, but she was still able to tell when they began to move away. She hastily turned the lock, then scanned the room for something to barricade the door with. If she was going to get any kind of rest, she’d need peace of mind that Ward couldn’t just waltz in at any moment.
She secured the back of the chair from the desk under the doorknob, then eyed the medium sized dresser. Normally, she wouldn’t stop to think twice about pushing it across the room. But with her shoulder and her ribs, just the thought of raising her left arm enough made her wince. The small sofa would have to do. She managed to push it into place using mostly her right hip, and while she would have liked to do more, that would have to do.
The timing of upcoming events was unclear, but in the show, everything seemed to happen in quick succession. Evelyn needed to rest not only for her health, but also because there was no telling when she’d have a chance to do so again. She knew she needed to get her ring from the broom closet, she knew she needed restful sleep, but first, she wanted to see Tony again. She wanted to feel the smallest connection with the only home she could remember.
The blue sky was thick with billowing clouds of smoke and dust as it continued to fill with Chitauri. The grounds before her were full of clashing bodies and weapons. The cacophony sounded familiar, almost comforting. Evelyn ran, as she always did, across the battlefield that had been the Avengers Compound, her feet sure and steady beneath her as each step brought her closer, and closer, and closer…
Evelyn ran. And ran. And ran. The battlefield never ended. The space between her and Tony never narrowed. Her legs began to ache. Her chest began to feel tight, her breaths short. She clutched at a stitch in her side, and pushed on, running, and running, and running. She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t run anymore.
Coming to a stop at last, she bent over, bracing her hands against her knees as she tried to catch her breath. She hadn’t even reached the point where she would normally trip. She straightened herself up, hoping to gauge how much further she had to go, but-
An unsteady gasp escaped before she sucked it back in. She took everything in with wide eyes, trying to understand what, where… The glasses she was holding shook with her hands, liquid splashing over the sides. She was standing at the foot of a set of porch steps, a flagstone pathway before her led to the white picket gate of the white picket fence. Beyond the fence were gardens, so many gardens, clearly well cared for and each one was in full bloom.
Following along the fenceline, to her right, was a small dirt driveway that met a stand alone garage. Parked just outside the open garage was an older model car with its hood propped up, and a man stood there, bent over the engine. His t-shirt clung to his damp skin in such a way that she could see his muscles flex beneath it as he worked. Evelyn didn’t know what was happening, she didn’t know where she was, but she knew that back, that hair.
“Tony?” his name tumbled from her lips.
It was loud enough for him to hear, and set off a panic in his heart. He carefully pulled himself up from under the hood, grabbed his rag and began wiping the grease off his hands as he eyed her shocked expression.
“Ev, honey, what’s wrong?”
The glasses fell from her hands, shattered glass scattering before her.
He dropped the rag, sprinting to her in a panic, closing the distance between them as quickly as he could. He slowed a few paces away, taking in her wide eyes and the utterly lost expression on her face. He finished his approach cautiously, eyes darting around her frozen form searching the yard, the gardens, the porch, trying to find what had her so out of sorts.
“Ev,” he said softly, “honey, is there someone in the house?”
Evelyn pried her eyes away from his and looked to her side. Sure enough, there was a house behind her, a quaint cottage. She returned her focus to him, more confused than before.
“Tony… where are we?”
“Home, sweetheart. We’re home.”
He let his guard down, no longer concerned with the possibility of danger. Now all his worry was for Evelyn. The glass crunched beneath his footsteps as he neared.
“What? I-” She stopped short when he gently laid his warm hands on her shoulders. An ache in her left one caused her to wince.
“Maybe we should go inside. Is the heat getting to you? We’ve been out here all day, Ev, let’s go in and get you cooled down.”
“Tony, I…”
He was here. He was safe. And his touch felt so real. This. This was all she’d wanted.
“Honey, what’s going on?” he asked, then pulled her in for a hug.
Pain shot through her shoulder, her ribs, front and back. She didn’t even try to hold back the gasp that left her.
Tony reacted instantly, pulling away, worry etched across his features. “What’d I do? Are you hurt? Did I hurt you?”
“No. No, of course not,” she said, hating to worry him. “I’m fine…”
“That didn’t sound ‘fine’ to me. Turn around, let me see.”
Evelyn did as instructed, the skirt of her sundress twirling as she did so. Dress? She wondered what she’d worn in her other dreams. Nightmares. They’d been nightmares…
“What the hell?” Tony muttered.
“Hm? What is it?” she asked, looking over her shoulder at him.
He looked up from her shoulder to her face, horrified.
“That’s what I’m asking. What the hell is this?” he asked, then gently ran his fingers over a spot on her shoulder.
She sucked in a breath, the pain searing.
“No,” he groaned. “No, not again. Things were going so well.”
“What?” she asked as he spun her around to face him.
He looked defeated. Utterly defeated.
“Every damn time. Can’t I just stay once? Just once for a whole day?”
“Wait, Tony, what are you talking about?” she asked, reaching up, placing her right hand on the side of his face.
He leaned into it, savoring the sensation of her touch, her warmth, her comfort.
“We never get a full day together. That’s all I want,” tears began to well in his eyes. “Just one more day with you.”
“Tony, I have no idea what you mean, but my shoulder; that has nothing to do with anything here.”
“What do you-”
“I got shot.”
His eyes went wide, brows lowered.
“You what?”
“I mean, that is to say, I tried not to, but…”
Tony couldn’t believe what he was hearing, his perfect dream world shattering around him.
“You. Evelyn, that’s not possible. You’ve been here with me all day. I would have noticed if you’d been shot,” he said, while trying to work out what was happening. The dreams, they never ended like this.
“Not today, a few days ago. At the Hub.”
It was Tony’s turn to be frozen with shock.
“The,” he swallowed the lump forming in his throat. “The Hub?”
“Yeah, I-I’m sorry, I-”
He cradled her face in his hands, searching her eyes with his.
“Don’t be sorry.” Tears began to fall. “Don’t you ever be sorry, sweetheart. Not for that. Not for what happened there. Not…” he trailed off, trying to maintain his composure, to soak in every moment with her before he would wake up from this dream.
“Tony, are you ok?”
He nodded, a sad smile on his lips.
“In the real world, Tony. Are you ok when you’re awake?”
“When I…”
“Are you eating? Are you sleeping? Are you,” Evelyn felt her throat begin to tighten. “Are you ok?”
His thoughts were spinning. What kind of trick was his mind trying to play on him?
Evelyn whipped her head out of his light hold, scrutinizing the house beside them.
“Ev?”
“You hear that?”
A light knocking sound.
“You get a lot of visitors around here?” she asked.
“None,” he said, joining her in trying to zero in on the sound as it became louder.
More of a bang than a knock.
“Who could be-”
“Ward,” Evelyn breathed.
“Who?” Tony asked, then saw her panic stricken face. “Ev?”
“I gotta go,” she said quickly, searching around them for an exit.
“Wait, no, I’m not ready,” he said, and grasped her hand in his.
“I gotta go, Tony! My life depends on it.”
“Your-”
“If I don’t wake up right now-”
“Ev.”
The banging grew louder.
“Tony, please,” she gave his hand a squeeze, “find me.”
He felt his stomach drop.
She leaned in, going for a kiss before she had to wake up.
