#list:starter

[emerybb]

Did you really just wake up?

[caleeesta-blog]

text ✉ open

calista: someone start a mariachi band with me

calista: i'll bring the sombreros

[lbrzel-blog]

ZELDA ➜ OPEN

Zelda: So I was in a parking lot today in my car and this kid tapped me

Zelda: I glance back and get out of the car because how do you hit a parked car and the kid bursts out in tears cause apparently was thirteen and stole his parents car.

[thea-waters]

To whoever left their phone on my coffee table last night, your nudes and dirty texts kept me entertained at breakfast this morning. So..thank you?

[stfuamira-blog]

I can't believe it's possible to blind yourself. I went out for lunch, you know, an innocent meal. I was getting myself dolled up and was in the process of using perfume. Who doesn't want to smell good, right? But sadly, it wasn't working when I pressed down so I brought it to my face to see what was wrong, to see if it was broken but when I tried it again, it ended up spraying right in my face. Literally, my eyes were open and everything. I'm starting to realize how big of a fucking idiot I am. 

[caleeesta-blog]

Then I was like "um, that's my butthhole." Anyways, that was my weekend. What's the calc homework?

[lbrzel-blog]

This was the best decision I've ever made.

[lukesebx]

Fucking hell. Can you not? I'd like my clothes back. I'm starting to feel a breeze in this towel...