“They don’t care about you.“ – juneofdoom day 6
Fandom: Stray Kids
Sickie: Jisung
Caregivers: Chan & Changbin (+ Hyunjin)
Prompts: Flinch, broken promise, abandoned
@juneofdoom
Tw: emeto
No one’s POV.:
It had only been the two of them at the very beginning. Chan and his first Stray Kids, Jisung. The two knew each other inside and out. That’s why Jisung knew he could trust Chan to always be there when he needed him even after their little group grew. While Chan slowly collected his members like Pokémon, Jisung was rather combative in the beginning, picking fights with everyone though Chan could tell the younger was just insecure about his position and tried to hide it by acting overconfident. Changbin too eventually saw through Jisung’s act when he joined them in writing songs for the group. With how much time the trio spent around each other, it was only a matter of time till they knew each other’s deepest secrets and though that made them vulnerable, it was probably a good thing.
At least, for Jisung it surely was. He had developed a little headspace and the moment his two overprotective hyungs learned about it, they did their best to care for their dongsaeng in any way they could. Chan read countless forum post on age regression, though his caregiver role came natural as an eldest sibling. Changbin had more troubles, being the youngest of his family, but he too tried to learn as much as he could. Baby sitting advice were his main source of information and it truly helped him come up with fun activities to entertain Jisung whenever he slipped. They also felt responsible to monitor the boy’s schedule to make sure he’d regularly get the opportunity to regress even if it was only for short periods, so he would have an easier time dealing with his anxiety. Of course, they’d occasionally get sidetracked while working but in the end, their dongsaeng always remained their first priority, so one of them would snap out of it in time to check in with Jisung.
Tonight was similar. Jisung had an important solo schedule the following day, so his hyungs had sent him home early to get enough sleep. They had promised not to get back too late either, so the younger could still get some snuggles from his caregivers. Feeling dizzy with nerves, Jisung realized he wouldn’t be able to sleep right now. There were too many thoughts coursing through his head, his mind racing a million miles a minute. If only someone found the mute button to shut up those critical voices in his head. With a sad sniffle, Jisung clambered onto his bed and picked up his Han Quokka plush. Slipping the plushie’s ear between his lips, he started to gnaw on the soft material and wondered when his caregivers would get home. Sure, he knew that Chan and Changbin still had some stuff to get done and that he should be grateful that they freed him time to rest before his important schedule even if it meant that the two of them had to carry his load too, so he couldn’t complain about the two of them still being at the studio.
As the hours passed, Jisung had finished watching both ‘Frozen’ movies in an attempt to distract himself from his nerves. He still wasn’t able to sleep though and found himself glancing at the clock more often than he’d like to admit. Being by himself while in his headspace sucked and didn’t Chan say they wouldn’t be too long? They promised! Of course, they wouldn’t abandon him before such a big event, right? Jisung hadn’t even noticed how tears started to run down his cheeks. Holding his breath, so Hyunjin wouldn’t hear his sniffles, the little snuck to Chan’s room and changed into one of his caregiver’s hoodies. The familiar scent soothed him some and he quietly waddled back to his own room. On the way there, a devastating thought crossed his mind though. There was only one logical explanation as to why Chan and Changbin would break their promise. Well, at least in Jisung’s mind there was.
‘They don’t care about you, Sungie’, the little realized. He barely made it back to his room before collapsing in a pathetic heap, sobbing helplessly to himself. He should’ve known. Having two overly sweet and patient caregivers had been way too good to be true and Jisung regretted falling for it. What was he going to do now? The two people he relied the most on didn’t care about him, had even abandoned him when he most needed them although they had promised they wouldn’t. With every sob, his throat felt tighter and the little desperately scrubbed his eyes with his sweater paws. By now, his nose was running too and he couldn’t even smell Chan’s scent on his hoodie anymore. The tightness was spreading fast, closing in around his chest and stomach. Jisung could barely get a breath in without choking on it.
The little’s heart was racing as he felt like he’d suffocate any minute. His chest ached and his stomach kept clenching and unclenching. Lurching forward, Jisung threw up over his lap, causing his breath to catch in his throat. Warmth seeped through his sweatpants as he coughed up wave after wave, a string of saliva still dangling from his lips after the gags had turned unproductive. His head spun and it was hard to keep a grasp on what was happening.
Hearing distraught hiccups as he passed his friend’s room on the way to his own, Hyunjin knocked softly but got no reply. He knew that Jisung often withdrew when he was overwhelmed and didn’t want to be bothered but his intuition told him that this was serious. “Ji, it’s Hyunjin. Can I come in?”, the older asked just loud enough to be heard on the other side of the door. There was no reaction, so he warned: “I’m coming in now if you don’t tell me to leave.” Again, no reply, so Hyunjin worriedly pushed open the door and tensed at the stench of vomit in the air. Jisung looked awfully pale and out of it when their eyes locked and Hyunjin crouched down, whispering: “What’s going on, Ji? Are you sick?” He tried to feel the rapper’s forehead but the boy flinched, so Hyunjin lowered his hand and promised: “It’s okay. Not gonna touch you, alright? Do you want me to call Chan-hyung?” Finally, a tiny, tentative nod. “Okay, hang in there. I’ll also get you some water”, Hyunjin hummed, dialing up Chan while hurrying to the kitchen to get his sick dongsaeng a glass of water.
Chan promised that him and Changbin would be there soon, were in fact already packing up. Placing the glass onto the floor, Hyunjin slid it closer to Jisung but the rapper made no move to pick it up. Neither did he take the tissues the dancer offered him to clean himself up. All Hyunjin could do was stay with him, a few steps away to not overwhelm him further. The older was glad when he finally heard the front door click, announcing their hyungs’ return. Once Chan slipped into the room, Hyunjin left to give them some space.
“Oh, Sungie”, Chan sighed, crouching down next to the little, “Can I touch you, love?” After receiving a small nod, the Aussie brushed Jisung’s hair out of his face and felt his forehead. The younger was a little warm to the touch but probably just from getting so worked up. “Let’s calm down, hm? Can you match my breathing?”, he hummed, demonstrating a few exaggerated breaths while pulling a tissue from the box. Wiping Jisung’s lips, Chan praised: “You’re doing so well, love.” He reached for another tissue to wipe the little’s tears and nose when Changbin came in behind him. Spotting the glass on the floor, Changbin picked it up and transferred the water into the sippy cup that still sat on Jisung’s nightstand. Hyunjin must have missed it in the chaos of the situation or he just hadn’t found it appropriate to point out at the time being.
Holding the sippy cup to Jisung’s lips, Changbin instructed: “Have some water, sweets. Doesn’t have to be much, just to get the icky taste off your tongue and soothe your throat.” The moment Changbin touched the teat to his lips, Jisung started to suckle. It was more instinct really and the older had to pull the sippy cup away, warning: “Slow down. We wouldn’t want to make your tummy unhappy again.” - “Let’s get you out of these pants, hm? We’ll run you a nice warm bath”, Chan smiled and helped the little to his feet. The leader had known that Jisung was anxious. That had been the whole point of sending him home early. Yet he hadn’t expected the night to take a turn like this.
While Chan got Jisung into the tub, Changbin cleaned up with Hyunjin’s help and prepared some chamomile tea. Though they wanted Jisung to sleep as soon as possible, so he’d be well rested for his schedule the following day, the rapper knew they’d probably be in for a long night. Hyunjin had barely said a word since his hyungs had come home but what was there to say? Yeah, he had seen the sippy cup but didn’t think much of it. It would make sense for Jisung to invest into a spill-proof cup. His anxiety often left his hands shaky, so he had spilled his drink on himself on countless occasions. If this was the solution he had found, Hyunjin wouldn’t mention it. Knowing Chan and Changbin had it handled and that Jisung would only get overwhelmed the more people were there, Hyunjin retreated to his bedroom after making sure that there was nothing else he could help with.
Grabbing Jisung’s pacifier from the secret box of little gear that he kept in his room, Changbin joined them in the bathroom. It was hard to tell whether the little had calmed down or just exhausted himself but he had stopped crying. “Sungie, do you want this, sweetheart?”, Changbin whispered, holding up the paci. There was the tiniest spark in Jisung’s tired eyes and he sluggishly reached out a hand, so the older handed it to him. His face was still puffy from crying and Chan carefully dabbed at it with a damp washcloth. Cupping his dongsaeng’s damp cheek, the leader hummed: “Are we okay now? You can tell hyungs what happened if you want to talk about it.” There was a moment of silence, Jisung avoiding their eyes as he played with some bubbles. “Chu came bwack fow Sungie”, he mumbled behind his pacifier.
Changbin crouched next to the tub and gently grabbed Jisung’s chin, so the little would look at him. “Of course, we came back”, the rapper sighed, “We promised you we would, didn’t we? There were just some things we had to finish first.” Jisung teared up again, so Chan warned: “No more tears, love. If you keep crying, you’ll get a stuffy nose and won’t be able to use your paci. Hyungs are here now, okay? We’ll get you into some of our clothes and have some cuddle-time. You look so sleepy.” – “I made some tea, so your sippy is already waiting on your nightstand”, Changbin smiled, picking up the boy’s towel. Together, they maneuvered Jisung out of the tub and bundled him into his towel. While Changbin stayed and dried the little’s hair, Chan picked out another one of his hoodies and Changbin’s shorts, hoping that wearing their clothes would soothe Jisung.
With Jisung in a new cozy outfit, the trio settled in the little’s bedroom and dimmed the light. Chan held his dongsaeng on his lap, while Changbin carefully tipped the warm sippy cup against the boy’s lips. Jisung seemed completely drained by his meltdown and clumsily played with the pacifier in his hands. His hyungs obviously cared, he could see that now. When Changbin removed the sippy cup, Jisung huffed a sleepy breath and slumped into Chan’s chest, weakly slipping his paci between his lips. His caregivers helped him lay down between the two of them and he contently curled up in their warmth, his worries ultimately forgotten.
