If you guys think I didn't just spend 2 hours on this uhhh you don't know me LOL
Lyrics under cut:
Verse 1:
That scoop of ice cream, so carefree
Melting away in our rainy spree
A piano laughed with time
Ding-dong, Ding-dong like notes dancing in rhyme
Verse 2:
Growing up I teased you for years
But never the reason for your tears
You always put faith in me
Yet through all my struggles you’re all that I need
Pre-Chorus:
How amazing can this life be?
(Back in our childhood days
When we were close as we can be)
It’s such a distant memory,
I know me like I know you
(Now it’s reality)
Chorus 1
If that day comes
The storm had not yet blurred my view
If that day comes
Would you stay with me if I asked you?
Petals pressed down where my secrets lie
Undeveloped film with colors bright wouldn’t be shadows
I hold at night
Chorus 2
If that day comes,
The storm had not yet blurred my view
If that day comes,
Would you stay with me if I asked you?
Blank pages in the diary untouched by ink or worry
Seven years may have drifted away
Jesse’s starred in some romantic movies before, and she thought she would have excellent blackmail material. What she isn’t prepared for, is the way watching her best friend kiss another woman makes her feel.
A/N: I use my MC’s name Riley throughout :)
It was a Friday night, and Riley sat nestled on her bed spread, stomach first, still in her work clothes, and exhausted. After forcing herself to change and get comfortable, she curled back up on her bed and opened her laptop to a streaming service she didn’t typically use.
As she scrolled through dozens of movies with no appetite for anything new, she hit the foreign language section and out of boredom scrolled through another dozen titles, until another “Recommendations for You” section pops up and makes her freeze. The title was in French, but there was something familiar about the man on the title art who was embracing a woman. Brown hair lightly curls around green eyes, making his features more captivating.
Just before she opens the title to read the description, it hit her.
“Jesse?”
Recalling his past in France, a soft gasp falls off her lips and she queues the video while grabbing a snack to settle in with. A giddiness settles in her heart. She’d seen a few of his theater shows already, but not realized he’d actually acted in movies already. She was prepared to gather every piece of blackmail she could gather from the seemingly romantic movie.
What happened instead was more unsettling than she anticipated.
In the buildup to the climax, the stars embraced, and declared love for each other. Riley had never seen Xia Mingxing with these kinds of expressions, and yet she couldn’t take her eyes away. Nothing about the language was recognizable except “j’taime” which she recalled meant “I love you.” In a strange way, it made her ears itch. The low trill of his voice, unlike what she was used to hearing, the passionate look in his gaze, the way it almost felt like he’d said it without breath. The woman was speaking, yelling, and crying, before they embraced again. That time, he kissed her passionately and Riley couldn’t take it. She slammed the pause button and brought a pillow to her chest, but her eyes remained on the screen. Could it really be the same boy that she knew growing up? Different color hair, different voice, different language, but those same bold, almost starry eyes. And there he was… in another woman’s arms for all the world to see.
Where did that thought come from? It’s just a movie! What are you thinking??
Mentally, she berated herself and rewinded a few seconds and watched the scene escalate into what many would call some kind of make out.
Leave it to the French…
She grimaced and didn’t realize how tightly she was squeezing the pillow until it was over. The movie continued, and she felt herself fully compelled until the end. It had been a more fulfilling story than she anticipated. All her idea to gather blackmail had been completely turned on her. If he had seen how she reacted, surely she would never have heard the end of it.
Later into the weekend, they had planned a meetup. As enjoyable as it normally was to see him, the movie scenes just kept playing on repeat in her mind. Specifically, not the kind of scenes she was proud to be thinking of, even though nothing in the movie had actually been explicit. Now she wondered if she could have even handled if they were.
Finally, he decided to ask about how quiet she was being. And without thinking, Riley blurted,
“Have you ever dated a costar? I imagine its easy with all the…romantic scenes…”
She didn’t want to say kissing. She hadn’t wanted to mention that she had seen his film at all, but it tumbled out anyway.
MingXing’s eyes widened, and something like despair settled into his brows.
“Did you hear something? Why did you ask this out of the blue?” He asked, exasperated.
Riley wanted to bury herself into the concrete. “It’s nothing!!! I was just curious, that’s all!”
To her horror, he also looked mortified.
“This is the first time you’ve asked about my love life. Why the sudden curiosity!?”
“I said it was nothing!” Riley hurriedly replied. Not a moment later, her phone’s ringtone went off at a volume she definitely didn’t remember setting it to. She seemed to jump her full height in the air at it, before fumbling for it to answer with shaky breath. Since it was from a coworker, she turned her body slightly away from him as she answered the questions being asked of her. Still, she was nervous from the questioning and from being startled so the slight tremor in her voice remained.
When she hung up, she found him still crossing his arms, looking almost worried, and pensive.
“Well?” He prodded, “You didn’t finish. You were telling me why you were suddenly interested-“
Riley felt heat like fire rise in her cheeks and her voice raised in pitch tremendously while she quickly cut him off. “I said it was nothing!” As she huffed out, the fire in her throat kept her going. “And– you didn’t even answer! So there is someone!”
And just like that, she felt like had completely flown off the handle. Expecting a bitter reply, or a scowl, or a laugh, anything normal for Mingxing, she set her jaw and balled her fist, ready for defense. Instead, he looked rather calm, and scoffed defiantly.
“Oh yeah. There’s definitely someone.”
Riley felt like a popped balloon, deflated in seconds with a brilliant disgrace. Swallowing hard, she suddenly felt her eyes burning and she had no idea why, but she suddenly felt like storming ahead of him. “I don’t know why that was such a big deal. I don’t really care.”
She could have told herself she didn’t care, but her racing heart wouldn’t listen. In her mind, she wasn’t sure what would be worse between him having a relationship that she didn’t know about yet or that it was getting to her this way. Behind her, she could hear him.
“You don’t? Riley, wait-!“
Thick steps cross their distance to her and a heavy hand lands on her shoulder to stop her. It was moments like these she realized just how much he exceeded her in stature now.
His green eyes were wide, laden with guilt, and although he stood a short step away, he wasn’t meeting her gaze. It felt so stark in contrast to the way he looked in the film that she felt a sharp pang in her chest when he asked, “Would it be worse if I dated a lot of people, or no one at all?”
Feeling guilty herself, she sighed, and clutched her forearm with her opposite hand. “It’s not a bad thing if you haven’t dated anyone…” At this she noticed his head turn sharply towards her. She continued, “But what’s the truth?”
“The truth? I was kidding earlier.” There’s familiar warmth in his voice that makes the hard lump in her throat begin to fade instantaneously. “Don’t worry, I haven’t dated anyone. At all. Not a costar, no one. I promise.”
The promise caught her off guard, and she stammered after it.
“Wh- you don’t have to promise a thing like that! There’s nothing wrong with it.”
“But I told the truth! And now you have to tell me why you asked.” He crossed his arms again, and concern returned to his expression. “Seriously, is there a rumor or tabloid? Did you see something? If I had a girlfriend I…” Awkwardly, he brushed some of his red strands from his eyes and scratched his cheeks. “Well… let’s just say you… um…”
The sight was comforting in a way she couldn’t explain. There he was, truly the same Mingxing she grew up with. She found herself smiling at him, and wanted to offer reassurance. “I would definitely know about her. Right?
“Y-yeah. Definitely! On God.”
“I didn’t see anything. The truth is… I was just, um…” Time to fess up. With a sigh, she determined in her heart not to be too embarrassed about it. Not in front of him. “Well I was watching La Vérité Dans l’Amour and I was just curious. You made the emotions look so real.”
“You saw that?!” He exclaimed, an expression of fear like he’d just seen a spirit. It made her laugh lightly.
“I was just bored and it was recommended…”
“Oh, so you only watch me when I’m bored?”
“H-hey!”
“Kidding! I’m touched you wanted to see my work but, gosh that one was a different language too… You’re really one of my most dedicated fans.”
A frown befell her, then she was the one to cross her arms in question. “One of?”
Panicked, he rose his hands up in defense. “The!! I-I meant the only-! The one and only that I care about! And besides, you were saying I was compelling, huh? Tell me more~”
Though she knew he was goading her on, she couldn’t find it in her heart to deflect or answer dishonestly. The memories of the emotional movie had settled deeply into her heart. “It really was! I was drawn in. And you had a lot of chemistry with your costar so… I guess you’re really good at making things look believable.”
Perhaps it dawned on him at that admission, for he looked surprised, and then relieved. A gentle laugh bubbled in his chest making her look sternly at him. “Man, if I’d known…” He acknowledged, seemingly looking pleased. “Élise is great! But she is actually already married!”
“Married!?” The revelation makes her dumbfounded, yet before she can really process what it meant about all her worrying, he continued,
“Yeah, last year! He used to pop on set and bring snacks and her favorite soda. It was very sweet.”
“I see…”
Riley didn’t want to think about how she knew factually that was normal for actors and performers, how it was as normal for them as it was for her dressing strangers in intimate positions with designs she’d thought of. And even if he had dated any of his costars, that was normal too. She’d jumped to conclusions, about a married woman, and about her friend, and suddenly felt uneasy in her chest. Most of all, she couldn’t figure out why it mattered.
As if able to hear her worries, she heard his voice soften, with no more humor, only sincerity. “If you ever, um, have any concerns though, it isn’t nothing to me.” Confidently, he put an arm around her shoulders, and without thinking, she can feel herself lean in.
“Go ahead and ask,” He assured. “I’ll tell all. Just so happens that there’s really nothing to tell. It’s just like that for the big screen.”
“Hmm, it’s ok. I really shouldn’t have pried…” The weak apology is all she can muster while she hung her head low, like a child.
“No, no! I really don’t mind you asking.” It’s kind of cute to see you jealous of ol’ Tang Yuan. I feel a spring in my step actually!” The sudden delight in his voice and the sheer prospect of jealousy makes her spring forth from his arms, spinning on one heel to face him.
“No one said I was jealous!”
He still looked horridly delighted. “Just let me think it for one second!”
“You-!” Riley wanted to yell, but she also wanted to forget this whole conversation happened. “You owe me an orange soda for all this drama.”
He feigned insult, clasping an arm over his chest dramatically. “Why, Missy! This is exclusive tabloid material! Why am I the one paying-“ But then he looked defeated, unable to let her keep her expression that he always called boiled potato face, nose wrinkled and eyebrows drawn. “Oh you… fine. C’mon, let’s go find a vending machine.”
Pleased, she begins to walk beside him. However, there was still one question on her mind. She also felt the need to tease him after all he’d just implied with her jealousy. “So, you were just kidding too about there definitely being someone, Mr. Tell-All?”
Mingxing froze in his tracks. Both turned to face each other. At first she waited, watching many emotions cross over his eyes, wondering what he was thinking before he finally spoke.
“That part… was the truth.”
There was no hesitancy in it. His eyes looked clear as a summer’s day. It makes her heart stop, and drop into her stomach. The emotions in her own heart swirled while she began to wonder against the cold, sinking feeling in her toes and fingers. Then like finding the eye of a storm, he spoke again.
“But… you’re overthinking it. It’s not what you think. Like I said, you’ll definitely know. I’m just… waiting for a good moment.”
Riley didn’t have a clue what that meant, but it felt like too heavy a thing to bear in the moment. If he was waiting for a good one, for whatever it was he had to admit, now wasn’t it. Right then, he was beside her, and no one else, and they weren’t in a movie. The sun’s rays land on their cheeks, both warmed and tinged red, although the sun wasn’t really the culprit. Rather than ask on, Riley pointed ahead.
“… There’s a vending machine.” She grinned wickedly and tagged him lightly with her hand and began to run. “Last one there pays!”
Something in her had begun to come forth, like condensation on a bottle that was once cold and beginning to warm up. There would be time for it. As she clinked her bottle of paid-for orange soda against his, she couldn’t help but smile against the emotions in her heart that suddenly felt silly. As long as she had this with him and these sunny days, that was enough.
