You've all honored your website and your fandoms, and now we come to this most important time in 2019, where across from us, Jeff D'Onofrio has, at last, gathered a vast army. But look again at this horde and ask yourselves: who is this great king who pays assassins in gold coins to murder Tumblr, our website, in a most despicable and cowardly manner? Who is this great king, Jeff D'Onofrio, who enslaves his own staff to fight? Who is this king but a king of air?
These staff do not fight for their fandoms. They fight because this king tells them they must. And when they fight, they will melt away like the air, because they know no loyalty to a king of slaves! But we are not here today as slaves. We are here today... as free Tumblr users! And all their algorithms, their numbers, their advertisers, and their fine bots will mean nothing in the hands of slaves.
Some of you, perhaps myself, will not live to see the sun set over Tumblr on February the 8th, for I will be in the very thick of battle with you. But remember this: the greatest honor a person can achieve is to live with great courage, and to die gloriously in battle for their home. I say to you what every warrior has known since the beginning of time: conquer your fear, and I promise you, you will conquer death! Someday I promise you, your children and grandchildren will look into your eyes. And when they ask you why you fought so bravely, you will answer, with all the strength of your great, great hearts: "I was here this week in 2019... for the freedom... and glory... of Tumblr!"