one-Shot | Comforting Loki when he finds out that he is a frost giant
Summary: After Loki confronts his father about being a frost giant you show up. You comfort him and remind him that he is loved.
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When you entered the artefact room you were a bit shocked at the sight before you. Odin was lying on the stairs, visibly drifting off into Odinsleep. Loki was holding his hand, and he had the most broken expression on his face that you had ever seen. The guards took Odin away, while you stayed with Loki.
"Loki, what happened?" you breathily asked while rushing towards him. He looked up at you surprised, he hadn't noticed your entrance.
By the time you reached him, his eyes were already filling with tears and when you dropped down next to him he collapsed into your arms. You held him close, rubbing comforting circles on his back. His hands clawed into the fabric of your shirt, desperate for some support while his whole life was falling apart in front of his eyes.
"Hey, it's alright. I'm here. I'm here for you" " you whispered repeatedly into his ear, occasionally pressing a kiss in his hair. "No, it isn't! I-" his voice broke.
"Shhhh," you whispered pressing your cheek to his head and cradling him closer to you. " I'm here and I'll stay. You don't have to tell me what's going on right now." He nodded as he buried his face deeper into your shoulder, allowing himself to freely cry in your arms.
You stayed like this for quite some time. When his sobs eventually turned into quiet sniffles and finally died down completely you loosened your grip a little, testing if he let you pull away or if he needed to be held a little longer.
He did not protest, so you pulled away just enough to cup his face with your hands and look at him. His eyes were red and swollen from crying, and the expression on his face resembled that of a sad puppy. You were sure your heart would break any minute.
"Want to tell me what happened now?" you asked with a loving smile, wiping away his tears.
He nodded and turned from you to sit on the stairs more comfortably. You sat down beside him and took his hand. He then told you what he had found out about himself and about his conversation with Odin.
"I have never been more than a political instrument. And now that doesn't matter anymore?! Y/N I don't know who I am anymore." he cried. You pulled him closer and pressed a kiss to his head.
"You are Loki Odinson. I see how you understood Odin saying the political plans he had with you don't matter anymore as 'you don't matter anymore', but I think that's not what he meant. Can't it be that those plans don't matter anymore, because now you matter? Can't it be that he abandoned his original plans because he loved you as his son?" you suggested.
Loki let out a heavy sigh considering your words. "He could have told me before. Instead, he just hoped I would never find out. What 'loving father' does that"
"A lot of them actually" you answered. "How parents communicate, or don't communicate, to their children that they are adopted is often a problem. And I so agree with you that Odin should have told you at some point himself."
"He told me he wanted to protect me from the truth." Loki cried "From what? From what I am? Am I such a horrible monster that I need to be protected from myself?!" Your heart broke for him at these words.
"Oh dear, no! Look at me.", you lifted his head from your shoulder and brought your face close to his. "You are not a monster. Don't you ever believe that. Listen to me. You. Are. Not. A. Moster" You reassured, caressing his cheek with one hand.
He leaned into your touch with closed eyes. Tears streaming down his face again. "How can you be so sure when you haven't seen it yet."
"Because I know you.", you press a kiss to his forehead, "And I see you, and there is not the faintest trace of a monster."
Loki got up, pulling you up by your hand. He wordlessly guided you down the stairs, to the casket. You followed him, squeezing his hand in an attempt to offer some comfort.
When you reached the casket, he touched it with both hands, just as he had done earlier. Ever so slowly his skin turned blue and curious shapes appeared on his body. He turned his head towards you, sad red eyes staring into yours.
"Do you see it now?" He cried.
He expected you to be shocked. To turn away from him. Just the thought of you leaving him was more than he could bear at the moment. If you would hate him now, he was sure that no one could love him.
But to his surprise, you did none of that. You climbed between his arms, which were still holding onto the casket, and smiled at him with so much love in your eyes that his worries melted away in an instant. Loki closed his eyes when you cupped his face with your hands and pressed another kiss to his forehead.
"This doesn't change anything" you smiled. "You are not defined by your genes. Yes, you may have been born a frost giant, but you were raised in Asgard. You are an Asgardian, and even if you can't see it right now, you are so, so loved here."
Tears seeped out of his eyes again as he let go of the casket and placed his hands on top of yours, holding them in place.
"Thor loves you, a lot. Even if you stab him sometimes." you chuckled
"He doesn't know it yet" Loki whispered. "I don't think that it will make a difference to him," you said.
"He's been talking about slaying frost giants ever since we were children! How can you say it won't make a difference to him!" Loki whined.
"I know Thor, and you do too. He won't think of you differently, just because you turn blue when it gets cold. And I think his views about genocide might change once he comes back from his punishment." you chuckle.
"And your parents love you. Your father too, even if you can't see it at the moment. Even if he majorly fucked up."
"He claims to love me. But does he? He's always favoured Thor. I don't think that I can ever be good enough for him." He bites back.
"And that's fucked up. But he still loves you even if he sucks at being a father. But you don't owe him any love of yours, just that you don't misunderstand me. But I think that, when he wakes up, you two should have an honest talk. Maybe you'll find together again, maybe you won't. Nonetheless, there are people who love you here. Even if you feel alienated from everyone now, you are not alone, my dear."
He didn't know what to do with your words. He loved his family. And he wanted nothing more than his father to love him and to be proud of him. But he couldn't see it. Not right now. Not with what he had just found out.
And now you were standing here, telling him that he was indeed loved. Could that be true? He desperately wished it to be. And after all, you grew up with him, you nearly spend the same amount of time with his family he did. So maybe, just maybe you were right?
"And I love you Loki. I love you so much. No matter what happens I will always be at your side. I will always be there for you. I love you so so much." He closed his eyes again at your words.
This was what he had been longing to hear since you entered this room. You still loved him. Even if everyone else would turn on him, even if he had been no more than a political instrument for his father you still loved him.
This was the one thing you said, that he could believe at this moment. You had seen what he was and still loved him.
He let himself sink into your arms again. When he felt your fingers running through his hair he let out a small whimper.
With every touch, you pierced his shattered soul back together. Every hug, every caress of your hand, every forehead kiss put a piece back into its place.
You two stood there, in front of the casket, for a long time, just holding each other.
Finally, you broke the comfortable silence :
"I understand that Odin won't wake up for some time, now that he is in Odinsleep. And with Thor banished, all the responsibility will be on you now. If that's too much for you at the moment, if you want to take some time to process everything, you can stay at my place for a while and escape everything, just for now. Only if you'd like, of course", you offered.
He pulled out of the hug, just so much that he could look you in the eye. "I'd very much like that, thank you" he smiled at you, sad, but also thankful.
You pressed a kiss to his forehead "I love you"
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Note: I did not proofread this so if it sucked I'm sorry. If I ever find the motivation to go over it again I might edit it and make it better I guess.