#long headcanons

[dvilsdesire]

Long Raphael HC as promised:

Okay, so I have some THOUGHTS while I still (slowly) read my way through Brimstone Angels about cambions and thus about Raphael.

I will try my best to not contain any spoilers but there will be mentions of Lorcan, a cambion tied to the main plot, and ofc this post may even be subject to change once I've gotten through the entirety of the story. Take it all with a grain of salt!

So, without further adieu, it's pretty blatantly expressed that cambions have ZERO chance of promotion and ascension. This is due to them being only HALF devil, and thus limited and not considered having the right as a true devil. Lorcan expresses that there is NO chance for him to be promoted DUE to being a cambion alone (even though his mother is a powerful erinyes). If we think about it, to be promoted and ascended, devils literally change form. They go from devil species/type to devil species/type eg, a spines devil is literally transformed into a bone devil, a bone devil transforms into a pit fiend (idk if I got the order of that correctly I'm just using that as an example). All of these types of devils are PURE devils. Cambions literally carry their mortal half around them constantly, therefore I don't believe they can actually be promoted into a new devil without stripping them of that half mortal side, and because they are not a TRUE devil... they are basically given the short end of the stick and never have the same rights as a full fiend.

Now obviously we would think status and promotion go hand in hand, right? It probably doesn't in the Hells because your status can be your reputation and efforts as well, but a devil TYPE and title is the true promotion. Status could mean even a servant of a high devil as a mortal or warlock, or half devil etc, this is also shown with a succubus character that is seen as more powerful than Lorcan/cambions purely because of who they serve - Glasya in this example (I'll touch on Haarlep further down).

We know that Raphael is at a higher status because Helsik states he is. Obviously we can take into consideration his bloodline as well. Reading through, it's given a really good expression and understanding of just how LOW cambions are and how poorly they are treated compared to their true devil siblings. Cambions are treated like SHIT! With a capital S.

What I love is also the insight to parenthood with devils. We see Lorcan and his mother's relationship (she's an erinyes and his father was mortal). He has erinyes sisters who ALL bully him, which is definitely how I believe Raphael would have been treated as a child amongst his peers and siblings. They are belittled and seen as stupid, almost like little children around the grown ups, because how would a half devil ever be seen as better than a full? Especially someone who couldn't be promoted.

We have to remember that Baator is also a STRICT caste system. There is little movement for flexibility. This means promotion takes YEARS as well as effort, arse kissing and someone to actually either be promoted to leave a position available and open to take OR die.

Now, it also appears mother/father always has a say as well. Killing a cambions child is NOTHING to get worked up about to devils, but Raphael still lives. This means two things: he's very good at escaping Mephistopheles' wrath OR his father actually keeps him around for a purpose. I believe the latter tbh. That does NOT mean they need to be on good terms (they're devil's lol). Just because you are family doesn't mean you even have to be fond of each other, it's just family connection etc. You don't get to choose your family or whatever the saying is.

Now obviously Lorcan and Raphael are NOT the same, and Raphael has the advantage of being the direct descendant from an Archdevil. I believe this gives Raphael quite the advantage when it comes to power, strength, and also general knowledge and status. I still believe he would have been entirely ostracised and bullied by his peers (he is inefficient as a half-fiend, he is still only HALF a devil), but I do believe he still had some advantage over a common cambion purely because he is the son of Mephistopheles. Does he recognised this? Probably only in the sense that "I am better than you because of my bloodline!" Not so much the "I am more advantaged than you." Raphael is NOT a humble man, and he would never give his father power over him by admitting that Mephistopheles had aided him. It's pretty clear in game that Raphael considers his father as unworthy.

Raphael still would have lived an utterly miserable life, not to mention the pressures of who his father is and Mephistopheles probably breathing down his neck.

So, moving onto Raphael's current position and what this means for him, as someone who cannot be promoted within the ranks.

The Crown of Karsus. It bypasses promotion because it makes the wearer a GOD. A god is more powerful than an Archdevil. Archdevils, though they may be extremely powerful, they are considered more akin to demigods or lesser deities. Don't mistake this for Raphael ever defeating Asmodeus, because Asmodeus is ALREADY akin to a god (and I think one of the most--if not THE most--powerful characters in DnD).

Raphael found a relic that could allow a cambion, a lesser devil and a half-devil, become more than any cambion has ever been before.

Personally, which I have written about previously in my hc posts, I believe that Raphael is exceptionally insecure, and his narcissism stems from a deep rooted loathing for what he is: a HALF devil. He loathes how utterly inefficient and lesser he will always be seen. As a half devil, he would have lived a life of his peers confirming just how useless and worthless he is, no matter who his father is. He weaponised that and turned it into ambition, but deep down, this NEED for ascension is something I believe is stemmed from that life of hurt and constantly being pushed down.

With the Crown of Karsus, he finally could have proven to every single person that ever second guessed him that he is NOT worthless, and that he is worthy of being great (also he's his father's son, so ofc he's ambitious!).

Secondly, Avernus. I think it makes a lot more sense now why Raphael is located in Avernus and not Cania. Because Avernus allows for a lot more flexibility and freedom, and even a cambion might grow status compared to Cania. Zariel doesn't care about the bullshit happening in Baator so long as the Blood War is on her front door. Avernus is a place for rebels and exiles to spend their lives, so long as they aren't getting in her way. It makes sense why Raphael would CHOOSE to live within Avernus over Cania. One, it's away from the prying eyes of his father, two, it's a lot easier to go undetected, it's also easier to access without having to travel down the Styx, but also because status there might differ from other layers and their Archdevil/Duchess. Even though there are laws, the ruler of their layer still has a lot of sway in the court of their layer. So long as they are pleasing Asmodeus, then everything is fine.

Thirdly, Raphael's "Ascension". It's not really an ascension though, is it? In fact... he requires souls to be able to USE this form. It's limited. Whether or not this is something purely they limited in game because his battle is already the most difficult, it actually makes SENSE that he can't properly ascend. Because he's not a full devil, he's a cambion.

Raphael, over the years, has taken thousands of souls, and much like Cazador's ritual, a (large) number of souls is consumed to perform this rite. This is something I believe Raphael was likely working on as a back up, as some kind of pseudo ascension he could use until he had the Crown. Unfortunately, it requires a LOT of souls, and without those souls, he can't maintain the form.

With the Crown of Karsus, he could have also bypassed this ascended form. It also makes sense why this form doesn't actually resemble a pit fiend as we know them. It's something entirely UNIQUE to Raphael. Raphael isn't an idiot, he has delved into YEARS of research. When we see a silly devil reciting poetry in a graveyard, it's easy to laugh and forget that Raphael has made exceptionally tangled plots, and successful ones, but also he's a researcher who could have taken the tadpole away (he was originally a legitimate option, I believe?). He's not stupid. He's AMBITIOUS. This means he can be blinded BY his ambition, but he's not stupid. He's far from it. He's complex and complicated, and someone that has actually been able to rise in status even as a cambion.

Now, RE: Haarlep, as I mentioned above. Another interesting thing I learned while reading Brimstone Angels, is that cambions seem to be quite WEAK to succubi/incubi. Likely due to their mortal side. From across the room, Lorcan can FEEL the charm off Rohini (succubus) despite the fact that she is literally not using any magic to do so, it's is merely her PRESENCE. I haven't read that far into the series yet and suspect I will learn more of her character and her abilities, but I found this very interesting!

It's important to note that Brimstone Angels is also written in a previous addition of the Forgotten Realms DnD, and succubus/incubus lore has flip flopped over the years, where they were once purely demons, then devils, and they are now considered neutral evil fiends. I tend to play with this aspect and say they are now mutts.

This makes sense why Mephistopheles gifts his son an incubus, and also why Raphael is unable to keep secrets from Haarlep. I also feel like people forget just how charming and alluring these creatures are. They are not stupid, they are not just sex servants, they are used as spies for a REASON. They are manipulative creatures, and it states that not a single one of them could be considered unattractive. It's impossible with what they are.

Anyway, this has gotten REALLY long, and I am sure as I continue reading the series, I will come up with more thoughts! XD For now, enjoy this, I guess? :)

[ameliaskyzz]

Dialuci headcanons!!! Yay!!!!

1. Whenever lucifer is in his demon form, diavolo will always kiss the diamond on his forehead, every.time. he just can't help it, it's one of the many things he finds beautiful about lucifer

2. Whenever diavolo goes to wake up lucifer it's like he's trying to make him drown in sleep even more with how gently and quietly he does it, he'll speak to him in a low and calming tone, he'll give him long gentle kisses all over his face and have lucifer relaxed asf like bro your supposed to be waking him up not making him drown in sleep even more! This is why they are late to school sometimes bcs diavolo does this and they stay in bed too long cuz of it

3. Diavolo loves to lay between lucifers thighs while luci plays with his hair

4. From when they were children till they were teenagers, lucifer actually used to be much taller than diavolo, diavolos head would reach only up to lucifers shoulder and lucifer would always be proud for being taller than the demon Prince, but after they became adults and diavolo became much taller than lucifer, even lucifer has to admit he was very surprised and annoyed when he saw diavolo for the first time in a while taller than him

Even after they got married diavolo STILL makes fun of lucifer cuz of how proud and prideful he used to be about being taller💀

5. I'm pretty sure diavolo is practically the principal of RAD, so. Here for me whenever we finish a test and our teacher grades it its usually passed down to the principal so she can stamp it and also go back on any questions that are right or wrong to see if the teacher made any mistakes, So whenever diavolo does this and he comes across lucifers paper and lucifer has a mistake or a few, dia genuinely can't help but secretly change lucifers answer to the right one so luci dosent lose a mark, he does this to lucifer and lucifer only

6. Lucifer and diavolo visit eachother and sleepover so frequently even if they have work they'll just do it together, and lucifer is mostly the one who goes to visit in the castle since theres much more privacy so luci is there almost all the time unless his brothers cooked up mischief or wanna spend time with him.

Mammon says that "they might aswell get married so they don't have to keep going back and forth" spoiler alert: they did and mammon kinda regrets saying that cuz now he's going to have to take responsibility of his brothers and the HOL bcs lucifer left to his own new life and mammon is sort of the oldest now💀

[dvilsdesire]

Raphael and clients

Raphael doesn't care what deity a potential client worships (though he will use them as manipulation). In fact, Raphael doesn't always expect a SOUL in his deals either.

A good devil is a patient devil, and Raphael's been making grand schemes for centuries. He works them slowly because that's the best way to manipulate people--so slowly that they don't even realise they're playing into his game. The longer a deal goes on, the more satisfying the catch for him. Ever the patient fisherman.

In game, there's a letter that states he even makes deals simply because they please his personal needs, I imagine these are sadistic pleasures, knowing someone has backstabbed someone else or is even digging their own grave. Whilst a soul is certainly something he wants (he is a devil after all), it's not always the end game of a bargain and he's willing to gain something as simple as sadistic and devilish satisfaction.

Sometimes, Raphael will even throw in a little freebee from time to time, just to prove that he is a loyal devil worthy of your contract, and making a sign of promise. Yes, he will deliver, here's a freebee, something I will grant you without anything in return, because I'm such a good saviour of a man, willing to lose to gain the big sacrifice in the end.

Devils who are impatient get nowhere, and people are generally fearful of them. I think this is why Raphael outright shows you who he is before even offering his deal. It's an act of trust on his part. I'm not hiding who I am, I am here to deal with you, here is where I stand. He could have hid himself away as a human the ENTIRE time and no one would have known any different, but Raphael was open and honest about the fact he was a cambion. A show of power and ego? Absolutely. But also a way for him to prove you could trust him (we can't but still lol).

So, if you think he's simply after a soul, you would only be partially correct. Sure, if it's up for grabs, he'll take it, but he's also willing to aid clients for free sometimes, even if it just means owing him a favour down the track ;)

[dvilsdesire]

// When you think about it, Haarlep doesn't really have a *dreadful life in the Hells as Raphael's gift. Succubi and incubi are still seen as pretty shit on the scale of Devilkind.

The fact that Haarlep has a pleasant roof over his head, is fed likely pretty regularly (if we can go by the comments of the boudoir and how many guests are invited).

Devils are a miserable people. They are competing against each other in the near IMPOSSIBLE chance that they may get a promotion. Demotion is more likely than promotion.

Even as a spy, Haarlep lives lavishly within the House of Hope, and the company could be far worse. We know Raphael's preference when it comes to the bedroom, so I can't see Haarlep being abused on the regular when it comes to this.

Arguments, bickering, punishment from time to time, absolutely. Even then, I don't think it's as brutal as some would be in the Hells.

Understanding that the Nine Hells is a BRUTAL place to live in, and understanding that when I say *dreadful, the comparison for Haarlep being a slave of the Hells, or a pet, or a gift (still beyond his choice or bound in contract), it needs to be put into a perspective and context where every member of society is still seen as a servant to someone (Asmodeus).

So, to be honest, when put into perspective, Haarlep is likely seen as more privileged than others out there, especially other concubi. His work as a slave for Mephistopheles seems pretty lax (report here and there to Meph and thumbs up), and the worst he probably suffers from Raphael is a little too much work in the bedroom, a lazy lay, and perhaps some punishment from time to time from the Master of the House if he misbehaves and a tightened leash (and of course being stuck in the boudoir for his existence...).

*dreadful - I say as a comparison to how much worse it could be living in Baator.

[dvilsdesire]

So you know how Haarlep compels people to fall under his spell, more or less - does that work on Raphael or no?

Random asks || always accepting

// The short answer? Yes. To a DEGREE. But it's more than that, lol. Now for the long version!

Haarlep is an incubus and has a charisma level of 20 (+5). Raphael's wisdom check is 16 (+3) and intelligence is 14 (+2). So... from a dice roll perspective, Haarlep actually has an advantage...

From a headcanon perspective, still yes. But I will delve a little deeper (because this is all my own headcanons now lol). Raphael is still half human, and Haarlep is an incubus (he is a fiend of the Nine Hells, not a legitimate devil). I believe that they can outwit and outcharm each other, given the right dice rolls ofc. Haarlep isn't immune to Raphael's abilities, and he's certainly physically weaker than Raphael with a strength of only 8 (-1) where Raphael is 18 (+4).

But setting dice aside! Haarlep is a manipulative WEAPON, and there is a reason why Mephistopheles sent him Raphael's way: to keep him distracted. It's WORKED. For however many years (which I hc to be over 2,000 since Haarlep looks like Raphael in his youth and I hc it to be pretty much after Raphael wanted the Krown of Karsus for himself when it was taken) that they have been together, Raphael has not killed Haarlep, and Haarlep has not killed Raphael. Is there resentment, oh I'm absolutely POSITIVE there is. They are fiends, but there are contracts that must be abided by, as they are in the Hells, which are lawful (even if Haarlep is neutral evil as an incubus).

Raphael keeps his bed pet, which... I do believe comes down to part of Haarlep's control and use of his charm abilities in some small degree--though a fondness for one another has likely grown, whether that's due to corruption or simply convenience and familiarity. Tbh... he likely doesn't have to work HARD, because Raphael is ALREADY obsessed with himself and loves himself, so all Haarlep really needs to do is lay back and be pretty and give the devil what he wants when he needs it. Happy wife, happy life, right?

But delving that little deeper outside of Raphael's stats, I do think him being a cambion comes into this. Raphael still being half human and half mortal. We see Mizora's fear of being turned into a thrall when she's locked in that pod, and that's another hc I feel leans into Raphael's fear of Illithid and why he detests them so much (because he's still a potential VICTIM to ceremorphosis--which includes mind control).

I believe Raphael has a LOT to unpack when it comes to his feelings of inadequacy as the son of an Archdevil, and someone who is still half mortal (human). He has the heart of a human and the brain of a devil, and that's COMPLEX (as all cambions). They are also seen as lesser devils and outcasts no matter where they go. Raphael is a victim to all of this, which creates a WHOLE plethora of emotional traumas he likely has locked away and does not wish to address (but HAARLEP does!). Haarlep uses this as a means to distract Raphael, to keep his contract, to make sure that Raphael is under his control. It's not just about the bedroom antics (though we are aware that Raphael is canonically a bottom bed partner), but also an emotional one. Haarlep can give Raphael what he requires EMOTIONALLY without anyone else knowing in the privacy of the HoH (which is also probably why Lep is locked away amongst being a mere item of Raphael's and his property/gift).

This is where their relationship becomes complicated (and obviously not like relationships we have as healthy humans lol). But I think their relationship is FULL of corruption. Haarlep corrupts parts of Raphael while Raphael corrupts parts of Haarlep. It's absolutely a shared experience between the two, and one FULL of mind games.

Ultimately, I do think Haarlep wins in this area, simply by what they are: an incubus. Haarlep is BUILT to manipulate, they are a predator and mortals along with half devils and half demons, and anything else sentient that has a soul, is their pray. A soul is food for an incubus, and Raphael HAS a soul since he's not full devil. Haarlep is a biological and magical weapon that is capable of manipulating anyone (so long as the stats and roll allow it). I also use traditional lore for Haarlep when it comes to being an incubus, so he is biologically alluring, expresses pheromones to aid in his seduction, which would all contribute to seducing Raphael.

Raphael, however, would likely be stronger than a FULL mortal, as I do imagine he would have some resistances that would be higher thanks to being a cambion. :)

[dvilsdesire]

Cultists:

So I have this headcanon that Raphael would absolutely be attempting to corrupt people and turn them into worshippers and/or cultists for his own cult.

All Archdevils (and powerful deities) have their cults, and it's something that ALSO grants them power. After all, to be a god, you need the power of faith in your name and those willing to serve and devote themselves to you and your cause.

We know that Mephistopheles canonly struggles to keep cultists, because they quite often get mixed up with the cult of Asmodeus. This is something that highly frustrates Mephistopheles, because he's actually losing people and influence to a rival (despite Asmodeus being the Archdevil Supreme and ruler of the Nine Hells).

Raphael would likely know this (especially because Mephistopheles is his father, I imagine he's heard his father bitch and moan about Asmodeus once or ten thousand times lol).

What better way to get back at his father than to ALSO try and start making a cult of his own. Of course, Raphael is self obsessed and in love with himself enough to think that he has earned a following, that he is capable of gaining cultists (let's be honest, there's enough Raphael fans in the fandom to start a mini cult so why not think it's possible for him to HAVE cultists in his name in the game?).

These COULD just be warlocks. These COULD be people who were like Gortash that he bought and tried to twist into his perfect little follower (but we know Gort absolutely broke those rules).

This COULD be Korrilla, and could also potentially be Hope. Maybe his infatuation with getting Hope to snap is because if he can't get her to follow and worship him and bend the knee, then others will refuse as well. It's a move against the lanceboard.

My personal hc is that Hope and Korrilla are not just sisters, but twin souls from the Thunder Blessing. To increase birth rates, they split each existing soul in two when it came to gold dwarves. So my little hc is that Raphael is so desperate to get Hope to follow him because hers and Korrilla's souls are ONE (and ofc the more he has the better--but the idea of having that twin soul put back together just feels like something so Raphael). I also feel like they are meant to represent light and dark as a whole.

Raphael seems to spend quite a lot of time on the Material Plane, obviously to make contracts and deals and gain souls, but what if it was also to gain a following. I can't see him passing up the opportunity to out cultist his father. He ALREADY is so convinced that he's going to become a god, it would be likely that he already has some semblance of a following (even is miniscule).

Most desperate mortals, so broken down and needy, it would be simple enough for him to play into their needs and suddenly have someone that has faith in him. He's, of course, put them entirely in that position (by humiliating them, killing off people, making political moves or personal moves against them) so they end up at his feet, but he also calls himself their "saviour". Why wouldn't they believe in him and put their faith in him when Raphael tends to use a corrupted and manipulative tact of "kindness" against them.

We also know Raphael IS of high status due to Helsik saying so when you talk to her after killing him. She's impressed you managed to kill him, and mentions that there's a lot of talk going on in the Hells because of it.

High status also explains why Raphael has so many souls within the HoH. Souls are supposed to be collected and used for Archdevils to power up their realms, not just lesser devils' personal uses. Soul coins are their currency, yes, but Raphael just has like 1,000 souls floating around in his house like it's totally normal (it's not, only devils of high status have slaves in their name and souls they can corrupt and turn into slaves or other devils--OR also use for their magic and other abilities that they use to give them power; this could be running his HoH which seems to run off infernal engine like power or as we see in game, gives Raphael his ascended form but it appears to be limited).

I just think Raphael would totally have cultists he would have spreading word of him around. A devil that aids and helps mortals in need, a devil that is smart and handsome and charming, and you can totally give yourself to him <3 He won't eat your soul or anything >.>

[dvilsdesire]

Not everyone is good in bed.

Me talking about Raphael's bed performance

I'm talking about it. The taboo. The thing that fandom either laughs about or gets way too offended by when it comes to a fictional character. Or maybe... we can just accept it for what it is, and it's not the end of the world :)

First off, this is just my personal headcanon (you do NOT need to agree with me).

No. Not everyone is good in bed. Some people are awkward, some people are shy, some people are lazy lovers, some people aren't interested and don't care (so it seems they're bad). Just because someone doesn't have a great performance in the bedroom doesn't make them any less of a person. Let's get that out of the way!

So, let me delve into my thoughts about Raphael.

I don't consider him someone that is a hyper sexual deviant (as in having multiple partners on a day to day basis etc). If that was the case, he really wouldn't have just one incubus. I believe that Haarlep is a special case and a special sort of distraction.

I think Haarlep (outside of being hired by Meph and gifted to Raph to be a spy) was also an in disguise way for his father to say have a taste of the flesh and enjoy it (you WILL enjoy it).

Raphael is canonly attracted to himself (autosexual). No one else was going to please Raphael other than himself. My Raphael believes that no one else is worthy of his attention and affection (because he's also a big, fat narcissist!). An incubus (or any other form of changeling or whatever) was the perfect present to gift to someone that only enjoys their own body and finds themselves sexually attractive. On the plus side, this works because Raphael IS a narcissist, and Meph leant right into that. Give my son a physical mirror for a sex toy, and he will finally feel sexually fulfilled, where nothing else would give him that pleasure and satisfaction.

Let's also point out the fact that people who are autosexual can still have meaningful and deeply intimate connections and relationships that are sexual and/or romantic (where Raphael's faults lie due to his narcissism, not because he's autosexual).

Raphael could have still explored sexually with other devils or mortals along the way, but I do believe they would not have been that satisfying. Pleasure is nice, but the thought of someone unworthy ever placing their hands upon him? The audacity!

My Raphael has been perfectly content with the use of mirrors, portraits and self pleasure (before Haarlep). In saying that, it has... stunted him a little when it's come to sexual exploration and experience (until Haarlep). Naturally. It's hard to gain experience when you're not learning new things and going outside of a comfort zone.

My Raphael was also quite young when he got Haarlep (mid 20's). I think a lot of us can agree there is nothing wrong with being a virgin in your 20's (THEY EXIST) especially for someone who was not interested in a sexual or romantic relationship with anyone other than themselves (or those that are on the asexual spectrum). Toys exist, other pleasures exist, one does not need to feel fulfilled by the presence of another being to lay with (everyone is different). Raphael is also an ambitious devil that is wanting POWER and to rule. Whilst a cambion (half human), Raphael would have suffered puberty like any human. This would have been a confusing and difficult time coming into manhood.

Hormones. Dreadful, horny, emotional, wanting to endlessly eat, hormones! Oh yes, they happened, and Raphael experienced what it was like to become an adult. Top that off with being half a devil, it would have been an extremely complex and tedious time for him. Raphael was an ANGRY teenager. This would have also been the time he discovered naughty books, mirrors, HIMSELF growing and maturing sexually.

Still doesn't mean he wanted to share that experience with someone else. Raphael, from a young age, was taught to be a devil and to embrace his devilry. In my hc, Baalphegor was there to aid in much of this self discovery, and even temptation--to which Raphael denied, not only because she was his father's consort, but because he simply was not interested in her sexually or romantically. He was interested in his own reflection.

Despite the deep feelings of loneliness and isolation that Raphael experienced as the Archdevil's son, he was content with self pleasure and keeping those needs VERY hidden. Raphael wanted his father to be proud of him, so any HUMAN trait was quashed the best it could be, and that included his feelings of inadequacy, and a deep desire to feel loved (no thanks to a very abusive and oppressive father and the lack of a mother). This also included the need to bed someone else or have any kind of a lover (after all, devil's don't love).

So Haarlep... Ahh, yes, the lovely incubus that could wear his face <3 Now, Raphael had someone to sleep with. Someone to teach him, guide him in the bedroom, and allow him to learn everything from a skilled creature that's job is literally to bed others.

Skipping over the purpose of the incubus' little introduction, Haarlep did serve other purposes. Comfort, companionship (even if they bickered and hated each other), and a guide sexually. As an incubus, Haarlep was born with sexual prowess by design. The raw embodiment of lust, pleasure, intimacy and sex. Raphael never needed anyone else to ever fulfil him ever again (especially because Haarlep was in his glamour).

Haarlep has absolutely taught Raphael much about sex. They've been living together for centuries. So what makes Haarlep complain about Raphael's performance? Well... four things:

Haarlep is a lil shit that loves to stir the pot

Haarlep is an INCUBUS (no one is going to be as skilled as an incubus or succubus in the bedroom)

Haarlep wears Raphael's glamour (making the experience felt multiple times as Haarlep says, so of course Raphael isn't going to last that long being double teamed by pleasure incarnate).

Raphael is a lazy lover.

Raphael is selfish. Having sex with Haarlep was never about Haarlep's pleasures. Having sex with Haarlep was about Raphael's pleasures. Haarlep, by all counts, is seen as an ITEM, a sex toy, Raphael's property and nothing more. Lep may as well be a living and breathing vibrator to be discarded of once the job is done.

Of COURSE Haarlep says that Raphael sucks in bed. Raphael is not soft. He is not compassionate. He may come off as poetic and even romantic, but he is not. All an act to get a contract and, eventually, a soul. For Haarlep, he has no soul to take (as an incubus/fiend). In fact, if we talk DnD traditional lore, Haarlep gets NOTHING from being with Raphael. I have implemented traditional lore into Lep's character, which is why he still can feast upon the pleasure of Raphael's body and physical contact, but that's a personal hc that seems to have spread throughout fandom (yay!). And ofc, we know other guests are able to enter the boudoir and partake in the pleasures of the incubus. Haarlep is being fed likely with flesh and souls behind the scenes in the HoH, I'm sure he's not being starved (lest it's a punishment from Raphael).

Being a lazy lover would be tedious for someone like Haarlep, to have to perform constantly and always be the one working. Yes, it's literally part of his job (and Haarlep, by all means, a sex worker if we go off his end letter explaining he is making a fortune off sleeping with others in Raphael's form--makes it feel like forbidden fruit, that devils had wanted to fuck Raphael for a long time and were never able to!).

So, do I consider Raphael to be useless in bed? To a degree, but not entirely. I think Raphael is a master manipulator, and much of that comes into bedroom play, however, I do consider him less experienced than a lot of other devils (or people) who are interested in sex and sexual activity, because he has limited himself to a single lover (himself) for such a long time, and would hence be a late bloomer.

It's impossible to think Raphael hasn't LEARNT things from Haarlep over the centuries, he has, but Raphael doesn't CARE to give that sexual aftercare, let alone performance. He is SELFISH in nature. He wants HIS pleasure, be damned the person he is with. Once he is finished, he doesn't care to pleasure the other person (Haarlep). Haarlep can do it himself, he has business to do. Raphael is the epitome of "I've nutted, you mean nothing to me now". That's just the way I see him, lol. He just isn't interested in other people's pleasure outside of his own, because he is selfish and quite honestly... not turned on by someone else's pleasure other than his own.

There is an aspect of sexual sadism that absolutely interests and gets Raphael off, but that comes down to sadism (and a link with sexual pleasure, being a master, being in control, and of course, being a devil). Watching someone else crawl on all fours as they are being tortured is a control thing, which is definitely sexually exciting, but once more, it's not about them, it's about him. Everything is about him.

It's not that Raphael can't be good in bed, or learn to be better, it's that he doesn't give a fuck to learn because he's a narcisistic bastard.

Being insulted by Tav (and likely Haarlep) badmouthing his performance is natural to someone who is narcissistic, but also deeply insecure. If one wasn't insecure, they wouldn't care. But Raphael DOES care. So much that he loses his temper, turns to a devil and initiated the fight (unlike the alternative options where he's actually quite calm and deeply disappointed by you before the inevitable battle).

Raphael has a fragile ego when it comes to his sexual performance especially, considering there are multiple ways you can insult Raphael and he merely brushes them off (he allows you to beat him a few times before he kicks you our of the Devil's Den and tells you the deal is off, but be damned if you insult his sexual performance!).

As a devil, he really shouldn't give a fuck, but as a man? This is such a male, fragile ego, toxic masculinity thing.

This is where I delve into another area... >.> (which is just me babbling!)

Going by Haarlep's comments, stating that Raphael is a lousy lover, Hope also yells at him and calls him a "flaccid-horned fuck". We all know that's a metaphor for "limp dick." What if Raphael actually had erectile dysfunction? OR he simply couldn't perform because he doesn't find anyone else attractive other than himself? (hence why Haarlep is constantly in his glamour). He NEEDS to see himself to get off.

Did you know that 40% of men in their 40's (and middle age) can experience ED? That's a HUGE number! Maybe it's my healthcare background, but I don't think this is something that is like laaawwwl never happening, not with our favourite fictional devil. What's wrong if he did? If you have a male partner, would you shame them for this? That's shitty, dude... Why would you do that? It's often health related, or could even be related to being stuck in a relationship they're not actually happy with (not sexually attracted to their partner etc--gay men hiding that they're gay so they marry women, etc etc).

Would Haarlep? YES! IN a fucking HEARTBEAT. Because Haarlep is a lil shit.

Would Hope? YOU KNOW SHE WOULD to get under his skin. She is literally being tortured by Raphael endlessly! She knows what to say to get deeply under his skin, and she's been around long enough to know these intimate details (she's been in the boudoir against her own will).

Would Tav? Obviously... XD since it's an option lol.

ANYWAY, this got way longer than I meant it to. These are just my brain worms, and wow if you made it this far... >.> You clearly love the devil we know <333 (and ilu for that!). Smooch!