#loviely

[saccharind]

“Darling, I’ve been meaning to ask you this for a long time. How about a photograph of you? There is a spot on my dresser that my eye catches the first thing in the morning and the last thing at night and I can think of nothing I’d like better than to have your picture there —“

from Other People’s Love Letters, edited by Bill Shapiro

[loviely]

i know i'd look for you in every universe but would you look for me? would you leave me there too?

[my-angel-my-stars]

If i close my eyes hard enough, i am right back in August - right back with you. The air is thick with humidity and the time we spent away from each other. We smoke cigarettes in your front yard, a fire glowing against your skin, and the feeling of my heart pounding against mine. We are like two children when we get in bed, laughing at everything and wanting for nothing but each other's company. We drink far too much and go on a picnic where I am reminded of what it felt like to fall for you in the beginning. You tell me about the history here; we talk about our own.

When we go out i revel in the feeling of your hand in mine and the idea of being yours. My mind is clouded with all of the responsibilities i have, yet so clear when i am with you. We are dancing, bodies swaying to the beat. It is only us - until your lips collide with hers. It catches me off guard, my jealousy gets the best of me, your lack of regard for me gets the best of you. We are both stubborn, neither one of us letting the other in fully, and i have a passing thought about how it's going to bite us again in the future- it does.

In the hotel room, under red lights, i tell you that you are the most beautiful woman i have ever seen - i mean it. I melt into your bare body against mine like a ship that was always destined to sink. You touch me like an artist that knows where every paint stroke belongs. When we are finished i nestle warmly into your chest. We fall asleep wrapped up as one, and i quickly open my eyes before i have time to watch us fall apart.

[avanillaopus]

I read that grief is just love with no place to go, and God, I would go anywhere. I would go to places with no names. If you went somewhere I couldn't follow, I would find a way because without you, every place exists to be empty. Cities stand in silence. Lights go out. Every conversation, every laugh, every deep breath and heaving sob gets sliced in half. Every word anyone says is an echo of all the times you promised me you were going to stay. The silence on the other end of the phone leaves me a decaying husk; the wind sweeps right through me, and it hurts. My whole life is a bruise, turning red, turning blue, turning green, then purple, then red again because it hurts all the fucking time. Nothing has changed. I still stick my fingers into all my bleeding wounds. I pull them open to let the light in, but there isn't any. I'm back on the edge of that yawning black hole, looking in. I stare for so long it starts to stare back. I start seeing your face—your startlingly blue eyes and your easy smile, the cheeks I liked to lay my hands on. I stare for so long that I forget who I am, how to speak, how to do anything but love you even though my love has no place to go. I would run into the pit if I knew you were in there with your arms open for me. I would let the blackness swallow everything I am, everything I'll ever be, just to look into your eyes one last time and beg for it not to be the last time. If I can't run, I will crawl. I will drag myself bleeding along the floor just to ask you to love me a little longer, just for one more day. Because nothing has changed for me. I'm still right where you left me. h.w

[compljcated]

do you have any of the answers? can you spare some fucking wisdom? // journal entry 001

[pol-ar-ity]

Start off gentle. Obviously. Lips capturing lips. I want to take it slow. Swipe my tongue along your bottom lip so we’re on the same page. Explore your mouth, your tongue, the roof, your front teeth. Little nips every now and then. Getting reacquainted even though it feels like it’s been a day, not hundreds. Fingers through your hair, on your face, dragging down your arms, under your shirt to run my fingers over your back. Kiss up and down your jaw, your neck, your cheeks. And then build intensity.

You on top of me, one hand down my side, ribs, waist, hips, back up, reacquainting. One forearm holding you up so you don’t crush me - yet. Your mouth down my neck, to my collarbone, leaving little red marks along the way, then back up. I’m wrapping my legs around your waist as your tongue begins working its way down my throat, I’m pulling your full weight onto me, rocking against you, trying to get as close as fucking possible. I’m moaning softly because every. nerve. is on fire. Reacquainting. My hands are gripping your hair tighter and tighter, and you’re pulling me to you as I arch up so there isn’t a single centimeter of space between us.

And you’re just fucking kissing me. Tongues all over, hands running wild, bodies moving but somehow totally in sync.

“you asked me how I wanted you to kiss me. this is my answer.”

[wednesdaybirth]

SUBJECT: IMPORTANT, LET ME KNOW WHEN YOU GET THIS (may 2023)