Heard the machine beeping a bunch in my eye exam and I was like wow those fuckers on tumblr would love this shit

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Heard the machine beeping a bunch in my eye exam and I was like wow those fuckers on tumblr would love this shit
Yk at some point it becomes almost insulting to jack off with just your fingers. Like I feel like I’ve graduated from having my own undignified flesh poking around inside me. I would like to utilize technological advances now thank you.
I’m so horny man I keep asking “what did they put in this birth control” and I know damn well it’s just some bullshit called enstergens in there
Voice in my head telling me ughghhh I wish I recorded an audio of myself earlier today when I jacked off at full volume alone in my hotel room. Well that ship has sailed. Sigh
Women will jack off and immediately start thinking about ripping a man’s head and spine from his body. Like yeah sure I understand the honorable praying mantis now. Sure. I guess.
My husband and I are gonna be fuckin under the weighted blanket mark my words
I need a husband so I can dryhump his thigh to fall asleep at night. Post
Showing symptoms of wanting that hairy woman bad