Feb 27, 2020
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Meteoroloji uyardı: Hafta sonu yağışlı hava etkili olacak
Yurt genelinde hafta sonu yağışlı hava etkili olacak. Çevre, Şehircilik ve İklim Değişikliği Bakanlığı Meteoroloji Genel Müdürlüğü Hava Tahmin Uzmanı Abdullah Macit, AA muhabirine, hafta sonu beklenen hava durumuna ilişkin değerlendirmede bulundu. Yarın kıyı Ege, Karadeniz, Marmara ve İç Anadolu Bölgesi’nin kuzeyinde yerel sağanakların devam edeceğini belirten Macit, yağışların özellikle Bursa,…
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Superannuation On Display
Never Go Full Klein Bottle
Pity the poor CIO. They must sit ‘pon their silicon throne, forever tasked, like Sisyphus himself, to deal with the endless sycophants from endless vendors bearing endless trays of silver, with the praise only a CIO’s gold can earn, delivered on endless bended knee. For this work, for this endless task, this shouldered boulder, forever in front of them, do they get even the slightest praise?
Never
On all sides, they are beset by base users and addle-pated “fellow” executives for whom nothing is ever enough. CIOs bless them with the fruit of their intellect and nigh-perfect judgement, shower them with Blackberrys and PCs and proper enterprise software that even includes the months of training needed for such acephalic ingrates to have even a chance of using it correctly, and what get they in return?
Venom
Pure unadulterated venom. The ingrates want “iPhones” and “Macs”. Their poor arms are too weak to bear the weight of two phones. “It’s inconvenient” they cry. They want software that is easy to use, as if enterprise developers are some form of mindless design monkey.
Sometimes, yea, even for CIOs, this behavior is so wearing that one can barely shake one’s jewelry from one’s box at the theatre when a galvanting jester makes a particularly titter-worthy bit of amusement. They ruin everything.
https://youtu.be/rvBCmY7wAAU?t=52s
(I really do love this. Lennon’s face is totes adorbs.)
Okay, that’s a little too sarcastic, even for me. In truth, most CIOs are not clueless gorps who can’t even be left on hillsides or ice floes because both wolves and orcas have standards.
Most of them, the vast majority are wicked smart. They know a lot, they have a lot of intellectual curiosity driving that intellect and they do a good job with what can be a Sisyphean task, namely balancing the needs of the boardroom, the datacenter, and everything in between, and they rarely do get the praise they and their staff earn. It is genuinely hard work, they do it well, and I’ve had the priviledge in my career of working for quite a few of the really good ones.
On the other hand…
The group I’m going to be talking about today are not in that set. First, for some background, read this…well, I’d like to call it tripe, but tripe has at least some use as a foodstuff: http://www.cio.com/article/2949540/macbook/cios-says-apple-still-doesnt-care-about-enterprise.html
Now, I was at that session. In fact, I told them, in answer to their displeasure with the lack of proper Apple support for businesses, that if one googles “Apple Enterprise Support”, the first hit is this one: https://www.apple.com/support/enterprise/, wherein one learns amazing facts. Like that you can in fact, buy “proper” enterprise support. One can do this on a per-incident basis, (around $400–600 per, I can never remember), or via yearly contract with three levels, Select, Preferred, or Alliance.
None of those are cheap, and in all fairness, Apple’s marketing of those things is…well, suck. It is teh suck. However, if one realizes that one’s business relies on a lot of product from a vendor, one might expect that one would put forth a little effort to find out what options are available beyond “take it to the store.”
Bless your heart if you thought that.
Here, from one of the panelists:
Aaron Gette, CIO of Bay Club, a lifestyle and fitness company, says he has never expected Apple to provide the level of direct support IT professionals are used to from traditional enterprise vendors. CIOs can successfully approach Apple in two ways, according to Gette. “One is the enterprise sales division, which is where they’re trying to sell you 10,000 iPads, and the other is leveraging the business team that’s in the [Apple] stores.” Gette has relied exclusively on the latter option throughout much of his career.
However you may feel about that statement, the…opinion…from the moderator of the panel, Maryfran Johnson, Editor-In-Chief of CIO Magazine that she found “…most technical people prefer Android” in a room full of sysadmins managing large numbers of Apple products and services is surely worse.
Not the worst. The prize for worst comment would have to be from Debra Jensen, CIO of Charlotte Russe, about how she works for a company comprised mostly of women, and as they’re very fashion concious, they love their little iPhones.
Really?
y’all may as well get comfy with this GIF, I kind of adore it too.
The sad thing is, I’m not really sure that’s the worst thing. Because both statements are stupid. There’s no way around that, both of those things are fundamentally stupid things to say. As was Maryfran Johnson, in an aside to Aaron Gette, saying that she thought Apple should be giving away Watches to members of country clubs, because…I guess dem rich folks deserve it?
To his credit, Aaron Gette had a look of “Um…yyyyyyes?”. I think he might have been praying for a metor about then. Or the Joker. (Note to Maryfran’s staff: try to remind her that maybe a room full of non-CIOs is not the best place for rich old whitey humor. Also, maybe try to not crap on the technical expertise of the entire room. She tried to get the audience to cheer her idea. The audience had other ideas.)
The entire panel was essentially up its own ass:
The CIO perspective on Apple hardware is changing regardless of how little assistance IT gets from Apple, according to Stuart Appley, CIO of the real estate firm Shorenstein. Appley says he wants to “get out of the business of saying no” to users who want to use Apple products, and he’s had to bulk up his own IT staff to fill in when Apple comes up short.
“Apple has never, at least until recently, embraced corporations and embraced the enterprise,” he says. “They’re a consumer-first company.”
Oh no, puddin’ had to train his people to manage his stuff. Jesus, did he not have an IT staff before? That can’t be, since one cannot “bulk up” what doesn’t exist. As well, I don’t know what kind of nonsensical mythos he’s trying to pull, but even in heavy, or complete Windows shops, you still have an IT staff. You still have people who need to be trained, or even “bulked up” when a new platform is introduced. Did they all magically know everything about Windows Vista/7/8/8.1 with no training at all? Appley having to deal with the basic reality of IT is not Apple’s fault.
As well, “Apple has never, until recently, embraced corporations…”? What the? Well, it makes more sense when you read this:
Unfortunately, Apple doesn’t play that game. When the company killed its Xserve enterprise server in late 2010, it “pretty much announced to the world that they didn’t care about the enterprise anymore,” Gette says.
Apple could design more enterprise-specific hardware or services to build relationships in the business world, but in most cases it simply doesn’t bother, according to Gette. A full five years after the first iPads began creeping into the workforce, little has changed for CIOs who want to support Macs and iOS devices, at least on Apple’s end.
Bullshit.
I’m sorry, but that is literally the only word that describes that. Bullshit. I’m sure Gette, indeed the entire panel and moderator believe it, believe it fervently. But popularity does not make bullshit into gold.
Again, I will absolutely agree that Apple’s communication with the SMB market and the enterprise is piss-poor, and they need to fix that. They’ve needed to fix that for years if not a decade or more. The Xserve really didn’t do much to make that better or worse.
But, a consumer OS doesn’t have support for AD, Kerberos, LDAP, Microsoft DFS shares, leading-edge versions of SMB, NFS, Fibre Channel, come with a SAN client, CAC cards, etc. Those are not things a “consumer” could give a fig for.
At one point, the panelists just veered into fantasy:
“Apple is so used to consumers, or they don’t care [about enterprise], because they don’t have to,” she says. “They’re thinking the consumers that then come to work for you will push so hard that you’ll end up going down that path.”
What these folks don’t, or really, won’t realize is that to Apple, they are not inherently important. As a good friend of mine said in the comment on the post:
CIOs often don’t realize that, to Apple, their business is no more important than the grandmother with an iPad. According to the Journal (citing quarterly numbers from Gartner and IDC) worldwide Q2 PCs are about 68.4 million; in that time Apple sold 61M iPhones and 12.6M iPads. I imagine it’s troubling to be confronted with a supplier for whom your business purchasing volume is the equivalent of couch change.
Pretty much. No one likes to find out they aren’t as important as the voices in their head say they are. As for this:
Jensen says IT wants to understand how to work with Apple to make its devices fit in their existing environments. “You want these companies to help you,” Jensen says. “If they want their devices to come into your space, they need to help you, and listen, and understand all the different things that has to play with it.”
From the same comment:
Further, it is ignominious to claim that Apple “doesn’t care about the enterprise”. A better statement would be that Apple doesn’t PRIORITIZE the enterprise. They do, in fact, work steadily to add features useful only to enterprise, and remove impediments that prevent enterprise adoption.
Why…WHY would Apple go through the trouble to create first MCX then Profiles and MDM for their products if they have no interest in the enterprise? (Also, spare me the “but that’s education” shtick. A k-12 school/district or a large university can have several thousand if not tens of thousands of computers and devices. That, dear friends is an enterprise, no matter how high you point your nose. It can be a very odd enterprise, but it is an enterprise. Also, Universities have no sympathy for your puling about BYOD. They’ve been living in that world for decades. Stop crying.) A consumer OS does not have an entire Directory Services team. A consumer device could care less about Exchange Active Sync. No, Apple is not going to build special hardware just for you, get over yourself.
But worry not dear friends, for I have the money shot quote:
None of the recent changes Apple made in the enterprise were born out of necessity. Almost everything Apple does for SMBs and their employees flows through its devices, applications and the platforms that power them. The company simply doesn’t have to appease CIOs directly, and it knows it. While support information is readily available for IT staff to review and follow, the entire process, from procurement to deployment and management, is generally self-serve, according to Jensen.
(Jensen should spend more time on the difference between Jensen’s head and Jensen’s nethers, Jensen appears to have some issues with differentiating them. )
This is what this is about. This, and only this, is why they keep banging that drum about “Apple Doesn’t Care About the Enterprise”: Because Mean Old Apple won’t appease them.
Apple won’t cut its throat on pricing for them, Apple won’t give them some roadmap that we all know is crap, (Seriously, what the hell is with grown-assed adults still believing in five-year roadmaps. It’s all crap, they know it’s all crap, but like the gorram tooth fairy, they still believe in it. You are not children, perhaps you should stop thinking like children), and Apple won’t show them stuff so they can have a bigger sekret knowledge peeny than the CIO next door. Apple won’t kiss their asses, and my friends, when you are dealing with this kind of CIO, there is nothing, NO-THING more unforgiveable than a vendor who will not plant lips to ass and tongue to rectum.
One last quote:
CIOs that can’t afford, or simply don’t need, 10,000 iPads would like their experiences with Apple to feel more like partnerships, but the reality is there’s little chance of that happening anytime soon.
Nonsense. But CIOs that demand vendors give them a handy with every PO are going to have a bad time with Apple. The rest (and thankfully, majority) of CIOs who are actually grown adults, not just pretending to be adults are going to have a much better time of it.
There are a lot of things Apple could, and should, be doing better to be a part of the enterprise. There are multiple, multiple legitimate complaints about integrating Apple devices into a business (APPLE ID HELL ANYONE???) But this quintet of codswallop never even came close to that. Pity. A panel with 4 clueful CIOs and a good moderator could have created a really awesome conversation. Instead, we got…that.
Why You Should Invest in Some Managed IT Services!
Introduction
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