Monk Life
play a lot of FFXIV. It’s a great game, great writing, etc.
This is me as a monk:
Also as a samurai, and every crafting class. Don’t ask about the name, I’ve been using that for D&D and MMOs and shit since 1989.
My minion is indeed a wind-up Sadu. Why? Because of this:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LXZhoXvkLgo
I mean, holy shit, why wouldn’t you want to hang with Sadu after that?
And Y’shtola, and Alisaie. Like those are basically his favorite three people in the game. Y’shtola’s response to the shoes was to just shake her head because at this point, in my headcanon, she’s so used to him doing shit like that, she doesn’t even blink. Although the Murderous Moogle Mogfists glamour did get a raised eyebrow.
Alisaie actually says things like “Really? The sarong and the glamour that leaves burning leaves behind you wasn’t enough, you needed PINK SNEAKERS?” The Mogfists made her consider that maybe Thancred’s drinking problem wasn’t such a bad idea after all. I mean, a 9′ tall Roe with a multicolored mohawk and now his gloves look like he’s strapped a Moogle to each hand as some weird kind of boxing glove...
Sadu has decided he’s her big brother, who never tells her no, never judges her, is always down to fight spar, and will happily go on whatever adventure she wants, even though he is very annoying at “accidentally” playing living wall between her and the entire towns full of people she challenges to fight...before she gets drunk.
There’s no real amorous tension between him and any of them, because they’re all his besties, in the same way 12 year olds are besties.They go on adventures, get in trouble, and he inevitably leaves the bar with one over each shoulder and Alisaie under one arm, because he doesn’t drink and they all think of “Drink Eorzea Dry” as a challenge, not a weird Lala thing to get you to consume overpriced shitty alcohol.
They are his peeps, right? Someone once insisted he was trying to get horizontal with one of them, and all four of them almost laughed themselves into a coma. It’s not that he doesn’t think they all aren’t attractive, because he does. They do think he’s cute, in a very large, very goofy way. But it ain’t like that. Also, except for Sadu, they’ve all set him up on dates, and he’s done the same for them. Well, he’s tried to. He’s a bit clumsy though which lead to one Lala thinking he was...procuring for them. That was funny once ‘Shtola stopped whacking him in the head with her stick.
Their attempts to set him up fail for other reasons. They’re very protective of their big goofy buddy, and there are not a lot of women out there who pass the test. Sadu is especially overprotective of him. What has them all very worried is Fordola. Because every time they’re in the same room, her right eye keeps glowing at him. Fortunately, unless she literally bonks him over the head and tell him exactly what she wants, he will never figure it out. Also, there’s a small chance that Fordola wants in on the group for the friendship more than anything else.
No one has asked Fordola. For her part, she thinks he’s very cute and has more than a mild interest in the underside of the sarong, but he’s also one of the few people who will visit her in prison, bring good food, hang out and tell her stories. He doesn’t pity her, he doesn’t fear her (I mean, he doesn’t fear anything, not really), he thinks she got caught up in some fucked-up Garlean bullshit, and really who hasn’t? He also knows how fucked up life with the Echo is, so being around someone who gets it is helpful for him. He’s the only person she can feel calm around.
Lyse would be one of the crew, but she’s busy running Ala Mhigo. He still makes sure to come by regularly so they can spar. Her advisors really love him for that. Some of them cheer when he comes by.
He’s their big doofy buddy who is always down and never makes them think he is playing some long game to get in the secret garden. He’s put them all to bed and sat next to those beds making sure the puke went in the proper direction so many times they’ve lost count. Y’shtola regularly changes in front of him, other than the first time, he’s never had a problem keeping his eyes from wandering inappropriately. The first time she did it, he did actually turn away so she’d have some privacy, but she laughed at him and told him not to.
“You do indeed have a shapely backside (Roe have ass for DAYS), but it’s a bit awkward to talk to. I’ve no concerns about you being inappropriate, so please, let us not pretend you’ve not undressed me when I’m passed out covered in whatever it was Sadu was drinking.” (Sadu goes from sober to puking faster than anyone would expect. The worst part is, it doesn’t stop her. She views it as convenient, since now she has room for more. Sadu is very extra.)
Alisaie barely gets undressed in front of herself. They’ve agreed to just pretend she magically pajama’d herself after a night on the towns.
Sadu doesn’t care who sees her in any state. Then again, the last time someone said something inappropriate because she had gotten nekkid drunk, it took a water sprite to put out the fire she lit on his ass. Did I meantion Sadu is VERY extra? Because she is.
It’s probably a good thing monks don’t actually need a lot of money as a rule, and that he’s quite good with the investing, he spends a lot of gil on “let’s just take this large pile of shiny coins and forget about those pesky authorities” discussions.
There’s no reason a Lominsan Roe, a couple of Sharlyan scholars and a steppe berserker should be the bestest frens ever, but they are, and none of them would trade any of it for the world.
(He and Krile get along famously as well, but she’s older enough than he is, that she’s more of his big sister, even though she barely comes up to his knees. The other three have agreed that watching him kneel in front of her so she only has to stand on a chair when she needs to lecture him is terribly cute.)
My headcanon.
