This isn't really an ask, but a thanks. I've been realizing that I'm an incredibly lucky person not to have PTSD, depression or any number of issues caused by the abuse I went through as a kid. The only things I really struggle with are food dependency, because the punishment of choice was starvation in my house, and a bit of an inferiority complex, because I was told for too many years just how stupid and worthless I was. I know I'm not, but I always assume the worst of things...but I try.
First of all, you are not worthless.
Let me say this again, because it’s really important: you are not stupid, and you are not worthless. You are a survivor of abuse and bullying.
Now, I’m gonna tell you what I told a friend the other night:
It isn’t a contest. Your trauma, whatever it is, is yours and how you process and heal from it is yours also. Your trauma being different from someone else’s trauma does not invalidate your trauma. That’s learned helplessness, ingrained into us by our abusers, making us feel like we still have to protect them, like we somehow deserved their abuse.
We did not. You did not. You are not worthless or stupid.
I am lucky, in that I wasn’t beaten regularly. But I was grabbed and hit and even choked on more than one occasion. Does that mean my pain and my trauma and my journey is less relevant than someone who was routinely burned with cigarettes? Or smacked around all the time? I don’t think so.
I think it’s healthy to feel grateful for the things we did NOT endure, but that does not invalidate or minimize the things that we DID endure.
Your experience is valid, and your feelings about your experience are valid.
And, because it’s really important that you know this: You are not stupid or worthless!
