@mieczlw : “How long have you been out here?”
the city is dark, middle of the night, and yet the street glows the most incredible yellows and oranges. It's a part of new york that he'd long considered home, though lately that title doesn't seem so fitting. the vibrant, welcoming glow in the windows seems so far away. hundreds of high rises that all make him feel so small, thousands of windows, each one of them glowing, all hiding some luxury life that he could never achieve. he'd been in one of those windows once, had lived a happy enough life, comfortable in the wealth that came from a presidential family. not anymore. these days he's in the business of trading favors, money an object he seldom sees. theres a loneliness as he stares up at all the little glowing windows, imagines a life where he's still welcome there, where that's still home. his dads would say that it still is his home, that he's always welcome, but he can't accept that. not when he stands in the rain, soaking wet in the same clothes hes worn for weeks, caked up dirt under overgrown nails. he is clearly not a boy that is being cared for, and the longer he stands here, the more he anticipates a security guard threatening him to leave.
the voice in the darkness startles him out of his imagination, freezing in shock for a moment before he processes that the rain isn't falling on him anymore. eyes raise to see the umbrella overhead, moving to meet miecz's gaze. he's embarrassed to be seen like this, soaking wet and pathetic. he sniffles, shakes, tries his best not to look like an addict that's falling apart. except that's exactly what he is, and every symptom of it is only exaggerated by his weakness from standing in the rain. he avoids miecz's gaze, shrugs the question away. "I c'n go." because he assumes that must be what the question meant. he cant imagine that he'd be asking from a place of concern, can't imagine it being anything other than wanting him gone. the boy is so full of self hatred that he can't even consider the idea that other people are giving him grace. his dad has never shown him anything other than love, and yet jason can only expect the worst.