#majestichippo

[safariopedia]

Behold the mighty and majestic Hippopotamus, a true wonder of the animal kingdom!

Know More: safariopedia.com

HippoLove

[exploringlesspolularhobbies-blog]

An Adventure in a Winter Wonderland

Naturally, having crazy friends, we do crazy things. 

For example, I, king of the snowmen and ruler of the west quadrant of my kindergarten playground, and my good friend, Maddy, a pregnant lady with bladder issues and the first woman to successfully traverse the terrain of north Korea wearing nothing but crazy pajama pants and neon nipple tassels, faced a tremendous issue when exiting the union finding that all the ground in the land had turned to scorching lava! The only way to get across the lava was with the gracious help of the snow queen, master of all things below freezing and pancakes. She agreed to let us use her precious snow as a transportation device, for the only way to neutralize the overwhelming heat of the molten rock was to dampen it with snow.  The snow queen was even so kind as to provide us with baby snow men for long distances through lava in which we smeared the flesh of the babies across the lava in order to gain safe passage across to the next patch of snow. 

Unfortunately, however, the abundance of snow became lesser the farther we traveled from the union, the home of the queen. You see, the snow queen was once the wife of our dear John Purdue and cannot move farther than 127 meters from his grave, for if she does, her poor heart would be shattered like the innocent snow-babies crushed so intensely into the molten lava that their tiny precious faces are no longer recognizable. This caused a subtle but vital drop off of the amount of usable snow and the amount of snow babies on the way home. The amount decreased and whatever remained turned to solid ice, making in impossible to spread on the lava. To counteract this, our creative abilities were forced to increase ten fold! We soon devised a contraption in which we strapped ice to our feet and skated across the dangerous lava for as long as the ice would remain at our feet. This caused the pregnant lady great deals of pain but she pushed through it for the sake of draining a near to bursting bladder. 

As we neared our target destination, the ice we were walking on became nearly as dangerous as the lava we were avoiding. We desperately leaped from ice patch to ice patch hoping not to fall and break a hip or Maddys' baby. Alas when the terrain looked so overwhelming we nearly lost hope, a majestic hippopotamus rose up from the a single snowy patch in the ice and offered us a ride for the small price of two pancakes and a scratch just above the nose in that one spot he can never quite reach. If it weren't for that noble hippo, there is a large chance I would not be here writing this story today.