#malevulnerability

[michelvaerewijck-blog]

Not about her #he #malevulnerability #fragilemen #contemporaryart #bymichelvaerewijck #oneoff #50x50cm #silveronglass #directpositive #galleryart #c41exposure

[easymanwer]

Men's Mental Health Flag 4, Men's Flag 4

Youtube link: https://youtu.be/QcRiTpcp62I?si=5_SUOxye2LP8KAma

Green represents men's mental health month.

Obtained colors from Figma.

Hex Color Codes:

#008000

rgb(0, 128, 0)

[wic-ink]

» My Dear Friend «

​ You told me you still feel far from whole, that healing is a constant struggle – and for that, I am grateful.

​ I have grown wary of men who shout from mountaintops about their journeys as if they’d already arrived. They offer the easy lie of a comfortable finish line. I am equally exhausted by those who constantly whine about just how broken they are, unwilling to ever step out of the shadows. Offering only the simplicity of a known despair.

​ But you – you are right here in the state of flux called healing. You are in the honest, uncomfortable, and often lonely place where true growth happens. You are living by a new set of values: presence over control, desire without entitlement, vulnerability as courage, and authenticity as strength.

​ This isn’t theory for you – it’s daily practice. And the truest test is the doubt that inevitably comes with it. “Is this worth it?” Whether this authentic path is simply forever a lonely one. Honestly? I don’t know.

​ Because here is the truth many are afraid to name: Healing is not a clean, path forward. It’s an uphill battle… a chaotic process of living in a world that wasn’t built for your newfound wholeness, all while battling the ghosts of a past that try to pull you back. And sometimes succeed.

​ I won’t say you’re whole. I am saying I see a man who has reclaimed his emotions, his story, his body and soul – only if not fully. Not yet. Your courage is not in having arrived, but in your willingness to live inside the tension of imperfection.

​ And here is the paradox: Your greatest gift to the world is not the man you will be when you’re “whole,” but the man you are right now – still grappling, still questioning, still healing. Because your willingness to walk these dire straits gives others permission to do the same.

​ So if today feels heavy, if the ache is loud, if the silence stretches longer than your courage – remember this: You are not failing. You are feeling. And that is the most radical act a man can commit in a world that taught him to be numb.

​ You are *not alone* in this messy truth. I see you. I feel you. I walk beside you. And I believe in the man who chooses struggle over comfort, even when it hurts. Every day anew.

​ Because it’s a **beautiful mess**. A fucking painful mess. But beautiful nonetheless.

~inkstains

[wic-ink]

» Dear Beloved Cøck «

I’m tired of working harder for less. I’m tired of proving my desirability while others merely exist and receive it. I’m tired of scarcity being my default.

I have opened myself up – keep doing so every day. I am emotionally authentic. I am aggressively vulnerable. I learned to be present in my body, to ask for what I want – and need. I am emotionally available, sexually aware, consent-literate. Hell, I can touch myself with reverence now. Or maybe “have to” rings more true… I can cry. I do ask for help. Am I perfect? Far from it. But I am the very list of things we’re told a mature partner would want.

And yet, I’m begging for scraps. Of attention. Of acknowledgment. Of pleasure. Of being made feeling worthy. Before, I could be a dick and get rewarded with pussy. Now… I’m drowning in silence. Wet? Maybe. Warm? Not so much.

Women can post one ad, get laid by nightfall, and get paid. Bad options? Possibly. Mediocre sex? Probably. But quantity needs to exist, before quality is a concern.

A man being emotional is often seen as suspicious, while for a woman it’s considered precious. Everybody keeps asking for male vulnerability, but omits the fine print: they can’t bear to meet it. So now I’m weak, too much, and often both.

For fuck’s sake, I can’t hear how damn smart I am one more time. All I want is to be told I’m filthy hot – unsolicited, without shame, by a random stranger. I want to be told how fuckable I look right now. And what they’d like to do to me. Better yet, have it done… And no, the irony is not lost on me.

This is gender fatigue. But try saying it when you have a dick and suddenly the word doesn’t fit you anymore. Just like a pretty skirt, language itself is reserved for vulvas. The ache is mine, but I’m not allowed to wear it – even my words are gender-barred at the door. The cruel irony: the very reason I live this pain is the reason I’m told I don’t get to name it.

This isn’t to say women have it easy. It’s about saying the game is rigged. Differently, sure – but in the end, it cuts all of us. Different wounds, equal pain. This is an invitation to meet in the middle, to cross the chasm of expectation and see the other side’s pain. The house always wins, and I am so tired of playing this game alone.

Bled onto this page, exhausted, starved,

~inkstains

[navymp3]

Often times we forget to fold clothes for our s.o... meaning we tend to overlook the smaller things that help fulfill our relationship meter. Whether it be folding their clothes, making the bed after loving, filling up their gas tank and making sacrifices. No matter the argument, yesterday's conversation with @gorgeousingrey reminded me to never go to sleep with anger towards one another. On this Sunday morning I would like to share #showersessionz Song: J. Cole - Fold Clothes #malevulnerability #soul #culturecon #jcole https://www.instagram.com/p/Bo62qVxgNka/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1wc8l36i8bx0m

[jamestriesvulnerability-blog]

Weak as I am.

My key theme for this weekend (there were elements of a holiday Monday and Tuesday too, please don’t tell Dai) has been vulnerability. Growing up, I have had an ongoing struggle with showing and accepting weakness – thanks, dad – which is a pretty pertinent issue for most men too, I think.

My immediate reaction to a vulnerability is to hide it, get over it, be stronger than it. But in rejecting an insecurity I hold, I am snubbing an aspect of myself and preventing reconciliation.

Being vulnerable involves shining the light on things we don’t perhaps want to see: feelings of powerlessness, or of rejection, or shame for feeling emotional.

Rejecting vulnerabilities

While in rejecting these issues, one will pursue the exact opposite. A man who feels like he cannot provide will do everything in his power to do so. He who fears powerless will attempt to control his external environment – people or actual. A man fearing rejection would preclude it by cutting himself off from others. A man rejecting caring and compassion would, in turn, reject empathy around him.

Healing and moving on

The greatest remedy to my insecurities has been to open up and own them. That’s partly why I’m posting this blog online. Almost paradoxically, making open your weaknesses to others is very empowering. Sharing washes away feelings of shame and guilt–to tell someone is to reach the point of not giving a fuck.

How it plays out on the big stage

If you accept that men are chronically unable to accept their weaknesses, I think it is easy to see why we act the way we do towards the environment.

Holding the majority of power positions, these chronic issues regarding masculinity play out as a collective power struggle between institutions of men who disdain anything which is weak and use what they can for their own advantage.

The environment is weak, it is other and external. As men, it is a means to provision and power, something we have separated ourselves from, as we have our emotions.