One Month In - Feb 1, 2015
It has been a month since 2015 started, and already I made some life realizations and changes acorrdingly. I just have been too bsessive with being productive, figuring out life things and trying to do better in life, and working so that I can get into a better career. I turn 23 in a couple days, and with the help of my friends, I realized that I can't worry so much about how I spend my time. I'm too obsessed with being productive, so I decided to not worry.
Not so easy, but it's a great effort to consciously change how I think. I stopepd thinking my current job is a waste of time, and in my free time I read and play video games and tumble. I'm just enjoying things for now. But by doing so, I open myself up to new inspiration. Just last week by playing a new game I got inspired and designed my own class leveling system for an RPG. It's not done, but i have names and basic groupings done. It's a start and its something I wouldn't have come up with if I hadn't played that game, I want to do so much in life, and I keep psyching myself out with 'not having enough time' so I'm just trying to rediscover my love for coming up with new ideas.
So a conscious, combined with meditating has been going well. I did have a kind of anxiety relapse the other day, which happens, and was expected at some point, because you can't be happy all the time, but talking with friends about it helps.
So I also started a 'Don't break the Chain' sort of thing. Where each day I read, game, write, design, draw, whatever. Just do something, and base it off of yesterday's work. The goal is to not psyche and pressure myself about tomorrow, but worry about today.
Well that was kinda deep. It's snowing heavy outside, and I just finished a wekeend of midnight shifts. Here's to an awesome birthday week!! :D
PS. I may or may not be trying to start a Youtube channel with a friend...just for fun :)
Murder of Crows by Anne Bishop
The Blue Parakeet by Scott McKnight (Reading in a Book Group)
Agaraest: Generations War
