Mathias & Nicholas | Papaoutai
Even though Nicholas’ memories had returned, he was still confused. Confused about what had happened to Kaden, confused at what to do with Antonia’s personality change and confused about his conflicting feelings towards the Nomads and above all Mathias. Nicholas was angry but then again he was always angry. And instead of acting on it immediately, like usual, he did an attempt to assess his frustration first. He felt like Mathias had lied to him all over again but the truth was...he hadn’t really. Mathias no longer had an obligation towards him and yet he had helped him when his memories had been gone. He had given him a shelter and kept him safe from the other Nomads that might mean him harm. He didn’t have to do that. He could have just killed him, pleased everyone and be done with it. But instead he fought for him, kept him not only safe but also close and he had actually been happy. For a moment he didn’t understand why his Sire would do such a thing after all the trouble he had caused, but then he realized that he would always feel like he would have an obligation towards Olivia too. Just like he had felt towards Victoria. Even in the beginning when Olivia had hated him for turning her and lying to her he had still cared for her and wanting to make things right. Could it be possible that’s how Mathias felt too?
Nicholas realized that his feelings resembled those of a rebellious teenager that was sulking because his parent might not be as evil as he had made him out to be. But there was also a part of him that was still frightened, even though he would never admit it. Kaden had told him that once his memories returned that Mathias wouldn’t hesitate to kill him. He had been ready to accept his faith once, to die at the hands of his creator but that moment had passed. There were too many people who needed him right now, too many things he needed to fix, too many reaons to live. But he had sneaked out on Mathias like a thief in the night and he knew how disrespectful a gesture that was in their culture. Especially after everything Mathias had done for him. But Nicholas had another family he needed to care for now. And deep down he would always be this scared, selfish and angry little boy that would rebel against something he actually just wanted to love.
He was now actively looking for his father because he thought it would show more character to find him than to be found. And when he finally did he just stood there, looking at the man he loved so dearly and who had done more for him than he could have asked for. Who had disappointed him once but who he had disappointed too, maybe even more so. He remained there, looking like a lost, runaway kid that found his way home and looked at his parent with the question in his eyes if they would still take him back. He thought it could go both ways. Or they would be reunited as a family again for once and for all or Mathias would try to kill him and Nicholas would fight for his own survival and they would spiral down a path of hatred and unforgiving manners. But the truth was, now his entire life was crashing and burning down around him, he just wanted his dad...
@theoriginalnomad