“You’re skin is so cold…why?”
Because I don’t want you touching me Brom!
Mathilda wanted to recoil from his hand on her shoulder, but she kept still and tried to mirror Judy’s jubilant expression. Judy was offering to marry them and the situation had escalated so quickly that as Mathilda scrambled to think of a reason to say no that wouldn’t blow their cover she found her mind going completely empty.
Brom’s mind also seemed to be empty, but that was status quo. She never could understand Kat dating him. To be fair to Brom, which Mathilda hated to do, she couldn’t understand Kat dating anyone, or dating in general.
When they were tweens, Kat would coo and blush anytime a boy looked at her. And she loved to speculate about who might have a crush on Mathilda or who Mathilda may like.
“Don’t you think Cal is cute? He said the most romantic thing to me after Latin class yesterday. It was something about stars. I bet he would learn spells with you.”
The friendly versions of Mathilda’s deadpan glare were honed in response to such comments.
“I think Spike has a crush on you. Maybe he’ll ask you to the homecoming dance! We could go on a double date!”
Liking the same brand of eyeliner does not mean that he likes me.
Mathilda had given Kat a half hearted shrug at this idea. She didn’t mind going to parties or a dance, but she didn’t see why she needed a date to go with her. She supposed Spike might be a good companion for sitting in the bleachers and making snarky comments about The Babes, but the idea of him asking her to the dance didn’t exactly thrill her.
She would never understand Kat’s obsession with relationships. When they were young, Mathilda assumed that she just had better taste in men than Kat, that her friend was willing to settle for a doofus like Brom, but Mathilda needed someone of a higher caliber, someone… not from Sleepy Hollow. But she’d gone to college and come back and met plenty of men. The warmest feelings she felt towards any of them was indifference.
A few years ago, Kat finally accepted Mathilda’s disinterest in men, but her little nudges and innuendos never stopped.
“Are sure Verla is just your ‘assistant’? I’d understand if…”
“I’m not having an affair with the girl who crawled out of my tv.”
“…well I’m pretty sure Lucretia will be happy to hear that. You know she doesn’t stop by to ask about the fire extinguishers all the time, she’s just looking for an excuse to flirt with you.”
This conjecture earned another of Mathilda’s infamous glares, but this time she almost wished the effects were telepathic.
No Kat, Lucretia is not flirting with me. One of the first spells I cast was on myself and it was so people had the urge to keep their distance and respect my personal space.
The day she and Ichabod were looking at her high school year book, the memory of that spell came back to the surface. She’d been reminded to refresh it. Ichabod was nice enough and his quest to help his roommate was an interesting challenge, but Kat’s desire to spend extra time with him was bewildering. She was lonely in a way Mathilda didn’t feel. Mathilda wasn’t looking for someone special, she wasn’t looking at all.
“And now, by the power vested in me by Sleepy Hollow and the Internet, I now pronounce you man and wife.”
Judy must also be a witch. How else did she make this veil out of paper so quickly? No wonder I couldn’t think of an excuse. Mathilda side-eyed Judy as she finished the ceremony. She is very powerful.
“You may kiss the bride.”
Mathilda stared down Brom as he tried to lean in for a kiss. The idea was too repellent to contemplate. She wasn’t straight, she wasn’t a lesbian, she was a secret third thing that would shove a bouquet in a man’s face even if she still had to be legally married and got arrested for breaking and entering.
Judy sniffled, “I always cry at weddings.”














