#mayb.e

[daegaryon-moved]

hey...................................

[anna-scribbles]

I finally have a regular weekly online meeting i'm supposed to be paying attention during maybe I can finally get some fanfiction writing done

[korilovestreble]

aaaaaaaaa

i hate my brother

omg i said it

I hate how unfair life is because he got everything and I got absolutely nothing

He has good grades, isn't as ugly as me, has a lot of friends and his personality wont make everyone stay away from him. He's very talented in music (bro can play guitar and keyboard) can draw a lot better than me even if it's not his hobby he just can i draw much worse even after practicing seriously for years. There's nothing this mf can't do and for a long time he was my favorite person but then I realised he doesn't care about me

I mean he does but not enough?? howdo i explain it like he never talks to me and when i say something cringe he will look at me with disgust bitch im a teenager of course im gonna be cringe don't act like you never roleplayed as mousse when you were my age

But he's not that bad?? He never bothers me and leaves me alone so I cook dinner for him as a thanks for not uuh making some ableist jokes like my sister does

Maybe he cared about me in 2025 when mom told him to check on me because she thought i was getting bullied and well she was right so when i was hiding from my bullies i came back to my classroom and he was outside with his friend and told me he was just looking for me or something never told him about it tho bc i had some death threats

And he definitely cared about me when we were kids he got me into the papa louie fandom when i was around 3 and i will be forever thankful for this because these fucking games mean my life and without them i would probably not be here

but I still hate him because he never did anything for me he ate lunch with me once and then left me forever and I hate how he has the dream teenager life while I'm stuck in my house suffering because I can't do a single math problem i hate how smart he is can he like teach me??? all he wants is his friends how does someone get such a perfect life imncrine

I have to study in my house because i got bullied so bad i can't even get outside without feeling horrible (uuh i made some excuses so my parents never know i got bullied) and while i love not having to talk to others it feels so bad to not have any irl friends and I can't do anything I try to start but I get distracted with my own body i want to be skinless like a chicken leg

my teenage years are ruined and they feel like hell I'm scared to grow up

and I'm here writing this while i cry because I have around 5 homeworks from tomorrow and I've been trying to do a single math problem for 2 days and i can't but I can't try again because he's in the living room where everything mine is playing guitar with his friend

i hate his life but I can't hate him

so i hate myself instead