#maythoughts

[babydoll-is-a-fallen-angel]

May Thoughts

May 1, 2016

I hate finals

May 2, 2016

I hate finals

There is too much to do

May 3, 2016

My presentation started strong and then slowly died

Just give me the chance to be ok and I'll be ok. All you had to do was to stop forcing me to smile

May 4, 2016

I was so close to not being embarrassed

It's like I had to get pudding because I am a fucking child

May 5, 2016

I'm actually glad my ex is easy to spot. So I can avoid him better :)

Why does this cough have to be the death of me. It doesn't have to be.

May 6, 2016

Why would I want to be compared to a flower. You do realize how easily flowers die.

Coffee is good

May 8, 2016

Happy Mother's Day

May 9, 2016

I just want to be with someone who understands that I'm not mentally healthy and respects how I choose to cope. That's all I ever asked.

May 10, 2016

Looking at notes for bonus questions doesn't count as cheating, right?

I was surprisingly calm for these exams.

May 11, 2016

I'M SO FUCKING TIRED OF PEOPLE BEING SO AFRIAD TO BE ALONE THAT THEY DO LITERALLY ANYTHING TO MAKE SURE THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN. INCLUDING HURTING OTHERS. THEN THEY LOOK AT ME LIKE THEY SHOULD PITY ME BECAUSE I'M NOT SCARED.

They're gonna make it my fault because I'm not mentally healthy, and that's why I couldn't make it work. They're gonna take their side because they can do no wrong.

You made me remember how broken I feel. I thought I was in such a good place before, and then it's like it was an illusion like I was lying to myself.

I don't know why I have to keep justifying why it wasn't working.

You didn't even say sorry. All you said was "let's keep trying" I feel like you don't even think that you have done anything to apologize for.

It's so nice out.

One more final. I gotta start packing.

May 12, 2016

I just want to be done

May 13, 2016

I appreciate people telling me Happy Birthday but I'm in the middle of a exam. Stop texting me.

May 23, 2016

Basically, a really rough first week back at home

[earthmusic]

There are plenty of insecure people in my school.

It is okay to be insecure but it is not all right when you inflict the same trauma onto others and create trouble with your insecurities, you bitch. 

I saw through you and you are just a joke. 

[earthmusic]

I have some friends that I would like to meet once every few years. The sudden aversion of meeting them stems from me hating myself when I am with them. I do not enjoy being myself when I am with them. Deep down, I know that I am different now, I have changed and grown. And everything isn't what it used to be. Meeting often doesn't make the friendship any stronger or healthier. To me, it makes it harder for me to get the message straight and a lot easier for me to ignore the problems. I don't want to be swayed by temporary happiness or persuasion. I think it is really important for you to share the same core values as the friends you keep. As I've got older, it has become clear that these values were hidden or yet to be shaped in your younger days and these differences in your values and friends' will grow more apparent as you age. It hurts considering the memories shared but I am only selfishly reminded of the fresh pain I am feeling now. Presently, I can only feel guilt and unhappiness. I do not wish to cut them off my life for good. They are still my friends but I do not want to be involved in their life as much as before. Who am I to make such decisions? Sometimes I am confused why are they friends with me when I am like this. I know that I no longer cared as much for them when my thoughts are " I hope that they will cut me off their life first so that I won't be the bad person" instead of "Will they be okay? ". I am not a good person. Therefore, I am just trying to surround myself with people who can make me a better person by being upfront about my faults and strengths instead of pretending everything is just rainbows and unicorns and hoping that I would do my part as a friend by forgetting their own faults and problems. I would love our friendship to fizzle out slowly and gently instead of emptying the contents with an explosion .

[maylalaloves]

Okay lang naman lumandi eh. Basta ISA lang at SINGLE lang..

[maylalaloves]

Guyths asar asarin din ang parents ng ayiiiieeeeee..

It helps na kiligin sila and mas maging strong ang relationship nila :)

[maylalaloves]

Ayoko sa line na ” Mas gusto kitang alagaan kesa sa sarili ko “. Mas nakakakilig yung line na ” Aalagaan ko ang sarili ko para maalagaan kita :) “

[maylalaloves]

Yung mga taong mkapag sabi ng BOBO sa ibang tao. akala mo naman kung ang talitalino xD Hampasin ng medaaaal haha >:)

[maylalaloves]

Gusto niya tanggapin siya kung ano siya. Eh yung ugali niya naman kasi hindi din katanggap tanggap..