#messiahloved

[dracoverlord]

                                      “ ‘buuuukiiiii ... ” kai mumbled and buried himself into ibuki’s shoulder more. the alcohol combined with ibuki’s genuine words made him melt. ibuki and kai were two people who had their happiness and gentleness forcefully stripped away. while they were gradually becoming comfortable with physical and emotional intimacy together, kai still had moments where he wasn’t sure how to act. he’d just get overwhelmed by the simplest things. this was one of those times, even if he was the one that initiated it.

                                               he whined the more ibuki spoke. it was definitely the alcohol making him so sentimental and vocal with his feelings. he felt like a child again. he could remember when he was an excitable child who was always goading ibuki into cardfighting him. he remembered when he used to do things other than cardfighting; when he’d play music for ibuki and miwa and they’d sing along. ibuki didn’t think kai heard his voice, but kai did. kai thought it was beautiful, even back then. kai thought ibuki was beautiful. he was so heartbroken to leave his first friends behind. he was heartbroken to leave behind his first crush.

                                               “ hey ... ” kai noticed ibuki’s tone shift, so he spoke softer. he lifted his head from ibuki’s shoulder. he knew ibuki struggled with what happened during the messiah scramble -- and what he had struggled with years before then. the entity that had controlled his mind and erased his memories haunted him to this day. how could it not? it had already stolen so much from him. kai tried not to cry for his friend, his boyfriend, his love. instead, he put a thumb on ibuki’s cheek, stroking the area gently. he gave a soft smile. “ even if you do, i’ll be here to help you remember. i’m not going away ever again. i’ll carry your burdens with you. i’ll take care of you. ” he was aware he was talking a lot, but all his feelings were tumbling out at once. he wanted ibuki to know he was safe with him. that he’d do anything for him. “ there’s nothing we can’t take on together, ibuki. ”

[furysflames]

messiahloved said:

ibuki had decided to stay the night at mamoru's house. he acted nonchalant when mamoru had offered for him to. he was careful to not let him know he did this on purpose. he wanted to celebrate mamoru's birthday with him. after putting ryuzu to bed, the two of them ended up doing fiva work. though the whole time, ibuki was thinking of mamoru. when midnight hit, he put down his work and leaned over to kiss mamoru. "happy birthday, anjou. i love you." ibuki held out a box with with a ring inside. it was a simple sterling silver ring with the infinity symbol on it and the words "i will always love you" engraved on the inside. "i hope we can keep spending birthdays like this, together." 

                                   mamoru invited ibuki to stay at his place, as he had been doing more and more lately. he loved spending time with his boyfriend and made as many excuses as he could. ryuzu liked spending time with ibuki, too. it was such a relief. after mamoru read to ryuzu and tucked him in, he and ibuki finally got to getting some work done. mamoru had to force himself to not get distracted with his thoughts about kissing ibuki. when he was finally making some progress, ibuki suddenly kissed him instead.

                                          his face heated up immediately. ... oh, it was his birthday already? he tended to forget nowadays, between keeping track of meetings and work and his family. he covered his face, flustered by ibuki’s earnest actions. ibuki got him a gift, too ... his mind was running so slowly just from ibuki’s kiss. he was so in love with him. he put his hands down so he could open the box and gently take out the ring. his hands started to shake and tears started to fall. he took in a deep breath. “ me, too, ibuki-kun ... i hope you know how much i love you. i love you more than anything. ” he slipped the ring on his right hand before moving both his hands over his face again. his face was so red, up to his ears. his heart was beating so fast. ibuki ...

[dracoverlord]

"i invited you over... ?" he wasn't completely awake yet, so he couldn't remember doing so. but kai said, so that was probably the case. "i must have dozed off... sorry." he flushed pink in embarrassment, then he rubbed his eyes. but he didn't get up. "you're comfortable, kai-kun... is it okay if i stay like this a bit longer? d... do you mind?" he felt shy asking, much like how he was when he was younger. "i... i missed you a lot. i'm glad to be with you again... "

                                  ibuki must have been exhausted. kai wished he could carry him to his bed, but that would involve waking ibuki up more. he didn’t want ibuki to wake up all the way because he knew ibuki would try not to go back to sleep. they were similar in that way. he gave a small smile. “ i’m sure you haven’t been sleeping, so it’s fine. ”

                                        hearing ibuki talk like this, sounding like more like his old self, made kai flustered but also sad. if kai had stayed with ibuki, perhaps he wouldn’t have been used by oksizz. but kai couldn’t have changed those events. he didn’t get his parents killed, nor did he want to live with his uncle. he didn’t change ibuki’s memories, either. he had to remind himself that it was factually impossible for it to be his fault, even though he blamed himself. kai knew that some change was permanent -- kai was never going to get his positive demeanor or energy back from when he was a child, either -- but he wanted ibuki to be comfortable like this more often. “ of course i don’t mind. actually, it’s more comfortable like this -- ” he reached over to put one of the couch pillows on his lap, then carefully lowered ibuki onto it. then he grabbed a blanket that was draped on top of the couch and spread it out over ibuki. this would do as a bed for now. “ -- there. sleep as long as you want. ”

[dracoverlord]

ibuki had fallen asleep against kai's shoulder. perhaps he was too overworked with his duties as the vanguard association chairman. he always had so much to do, and didn't let himself take many breaks. around a half hour later, he woke up a little and yawned softly. he shifted his position a little, looking up at kai. "mm, kai-kun... ? what are you doing here?" he was so out of it he had forgotten he invited him over.

                                    ibuki had invited kai over, but not long into their initial conversation, ibuki had drifted off. he knew it was a common trait of his friends to overwork themselves, and ibuki was no exception. ibuki had recently taken on a much larger role at the vanguard association, too. being a pro fighter was tough, especially when it came to fighting internationally, but kai didn’t think it compared to all the work that ibuki had to put in as the vanguard association chairman. 

                                          kai let himself softly card his fingers through ibuki’s hair, hoping the soothing motion would allow him to have a deeper sleep. however, it wasn’t long before ibuki started to wake up, and kai quickly moved his hand away. his face was red from embarrassment, hoping ibuki hadn’t caught him, only to heat up even more when ibuki spoke. he hadn’t called him kai-kun since they were kids; it was too personal after kai had left him behind. besides, ibuki had changed a lot since then -- so did kai. neither of them were the type to use honorifics in general; especially not in this context. “ you invited me over. ” kai forced out, trying not to sound too stiff whilst willing the heat from his cheeks.

[furysflames]

messiahloved asked:

"... is this alright?" ibuki stiffly holds ryuzu in his arms, fearing that if he moved, he would drop him. he didn't know the first thing about taking care of kids. if he had ever been around them, he didn't remember. ryuzu seemed to be doing alright, he was even smiling. he seemed to like to tug at ibuki's hair, something he was still getting used to. "i'm nowhere near as good at this as you are, anjou." he felt nervous, like ryuzu might start crying at any second. "i don't know how you do it."

                                   “ it’s perfect. just relax, ibuki-kun. ” mamoru can’t help laughing a bit watching the two before him. ibuki holds ryuzu fine, but he’s as still as a statue. meanwhile, ryuzu is relaxed in his arms, even pulling at his hair. ibuki has resigned himself to his fate, discomfort only expressed by his facial expression.

                                                   mamoru reaches out, gently prying ryuzu’s hands open and replacing ibuki’s hair with a toy. compared to how tokoha was, ryuzu is a well mannered baby. “ you’re flattering me. i have a lot of help, you included. ” mamoru smiles, moving his hand up to push ibuki’s hair off his shoulders. “ i’m trying my best and hoping it’s enough. i’ve had experience taking care of tokoha, but being a big brother is different ... ”

                                                   he can’t bring himself to say he’s ryuzu’s dad. in every sense of the word, he is. he takes care of him, he nurtures him, he’s devoted all of his heart to this child from the moment he held him in his arms. he considers ryuzu his son, but is he worthy of being called ryuzu’s father?

                                                  “ ... you’re a natural. i should leave you two here so i can get some work done! ” mamoru jokes a bit to get away from those feelings. it doesn’t do him any good to dwell on those worries. “ kidding, of course ... but he is comfortable with you. i’m glad. ”