I've touched on this a little bit before, but since you asked, I'll give a little more of my thoughts on the matter.
But before I get into it, here's my overall takes on the matter. The rest will be under the cut.
TK has symptoms that align with borderline personality disorder, so the case could be made that he has it, but those symptoms can also be aligned with a lot of other mental health issues.
While I think it could be a good storyline if done right (because showing people with mental illnesses without making them villains or flat characters is something we always need more of), I don't trust the show to do it right and I don't think the show would ever explicitly label him as having BPD.
Regardless, the idea intrigues me, and a lot of canon events reflect this diagnosis. As I don't have psychological training, I'm not an expert on this by any means, so take what I say with a grain of salt. I’ll try to add links to resources to add some insight.
Excuse this long and winding rant and the lack of proofreading.
Throughout the first two seasons of 911: Lone Star, viewers watch TK struggle with mostly undefined mental health issues. Substance abuse issues are defined in canon, but potential depression and other mental health issues are left vague. However, the source content suggests that there is more going on with TK than is mentioned on screen or will ever be mentioned on screen, and Borderline Personality Disorder seems to match TK’s behaviors and thought processes. This essay is just one lens to view TK’s character, and there are many others that are equally interesting and valid. Of course, BPD symptoms can reflect symptoms of other conditions such as depression, PTSD, anxiety, or ADHD, and BPD is often comorbid with other conditions. Even so, it’s hard to deny the behavior patterns that TK tends to have and how they connect to BPD. Based on on TK’s emotional behaviors, mental health issues, and thought patterns, it can be argued that he shows at least the symptoms of BPD.
According to NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness, Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) “is a condition characterized by difficulties regulating emotions.” Being a personality disorder, a person with BPD has an inflexible pattern of thought and corresponding behaviors. The hallmarks of BPD include tumultuous relationships, intense emotions, trouble with self-regulation, impulsivity, and self-image and identity issues. Unfortunately, seventy percent of people with BPD will attempt suicide in their lives due to the intensity of their feels and feelings of emptiness that can often occur in those with this condition.
BPD is not an uncommon condition, but it is often misunderstood or stigmatized. Salters-Pedneault from verywellmind highlights that studies suggest that 1.6% of the population has BPD. Furthermore, although 75% of people who are diagnosed with this condition are women, some researchers believe that this discrepancy is due to misdiagnosis, and men with BPD may be diagnosed with conditions like PTSD or depression. Interestingly, diagnosis tends to be higher among those who are lesbian, gay, or bisexual due to diagnostic models that may not always give the proper results. Thus, even among professionals, diagnosis can be tricky and finding the true prevalence is a challenge.
In additional to diagnosis challenges, there is stigma among the public and the mental health treatment community. Research suggests that BPD is the condition that mental health professionals most often stigmatize. Some professionals won’t treat those with BPD and those who do, may not truly understand the nature of BPD. This stigma, unfortunately, reiterates the worries of abandonment and rejection that BPD sufferers face and cause them to think they cannot get help when BPD is actually highly treatable using techniques like DBT. Though, because it can greatly impact functionality, it is highly studied. Thus, for those wanting to learn more about it, there are resources available.
While the causes of BPD are not entirely known, TK’s childhood meets many of the environmental factors that are common in those with BPD. BPD is often associated to children not receiving the emotional validation they need. A review by Kulacaoglu and Kose discusses how BPD results in genetic, psychological, and neurobiological factors. Due to the increased prevalence in monozygotic twins, research suggests that people are predisposed to BPD and often develop it when they are in a non-supportive environment. An environment can be non-supportive in a wide range of ways, and Kulacaoglu and Kose suggest that childhood trauma is the most prevalent cause. The Optimum Performance Institute, which specializes in BPD treatment for young adults, cites PTSD, childhood abandonment, and unstable family relationships as some of the top environmental influencers for BPD. 9/11 and the resulting trauma, including his parents likely unstable and clearly dysfunctional relationship, could all be factors in the development of BPD. Additionally, in the season 1 finale, TK expresses that Owen left when TK was seven, and that’s a clear sense of abandonment, regardless of Owen’s intentions or reasonings.
T.K. also clearly fits many of the traits outlined by the DSM, which is used in the U.S. (and beyond) to diagnosis BPD. According to the DSM-V, One of the traits of those with BPD is “frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment,” relating to TK’s persistent worries about being abandoned or rejected. During 9/11, TK likely had very real fears that his father would die, which to a child often feels like abandonment, and then, despite Owen still being alive, he became more distant, which would have validated TK’s fears rather than easing them. Owen’s trauma kept him away from TK, and TK began to associate Owen’s firefighters as his real family, which likely influenced TK’s decision to be a firefighter because he was desperately trying to make himself part of Owen’s life. TK continues to act in ways to please Owen because he doesn’t want to lose the relationship he has with Owen.
There are a ton of concrete moments where we see TK acting in a way that’s clearly informed by his worry that someone will abandon or reject him. TK often pushes other people away before they can reject him or leave him. In S01E03, TK literally pushes Judd away from him in response to Judd’s angry reaction to TK’s reckless behavior in the silo: trauma meet trauma. Judd’s anger comes from a place of concern, but TK cannot see that because he can’t see past the worry of being unliked or judged. Or, even worse, Judd suggests that TK gets preferential treatment from his father. While TK certainly does get special treatment from his father, the implication is aggravating to TK because TK feels like Owen has always given preferential treatment to his firefighters, and Owen choosing the firehouse over his family is one of TK’s triggers.
Then, in S01E02, we see the disastrous almost-date between TK and Carlos. TK was devastated by his breakup with Alex and his relapse. He didn’t want anything serious with Carlos, not because he didn’t want deep connection but because he was afraid of the pain that of someone deciding he wasn’t worth it. When Carlos tried to make TK dinner, TK became uncomfortable, and when Carlos pulls out alcoholic beverages, that speaks even more poignantly to TK’s insecurities. His addiction likely fuels his fears of not being enough, which relate to his fears of abandonment. What this means is that it’s not uncommon for people with mental illnesses to think that they are broken or lesser because of those issues, and TK’s addiction is hard for him to open up about, especially at first.
TK’s relationship with Alex alone points to him going to extreme efforts to avoid abandonment. Owen hints that the relationship wasn’t at a place that was ready for marriage when TK suggests that he is going to propose in S01E01. Then, it turns out that Owen is cheating at TK, and the proposal doesn’t lead to a new chapter in TK’s relationship, but it is the end. Other people clearly suspected their were issues in the relationship, and it’s likely that TK proposed because he sensed the relationship slipping, and so he used a “grand gesture” to avoid losing Alex. Then, when TK knows the truth, it results in a relapse and him nearly dying, which could relate more the his fears of abandonment than the breakup itself.
Another DSM criterion is “a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized between extremes of idealization and devaluation.” This is a defensive mechanism to shield the BPD sufferer from hurt, but it can cause unstable relationships and relates to all or nothing thinking. There are no explicit moments of TK “splitting,” the term for when people with BPD change from idealization to devaluation or vice versa—going from admiration and love to anger and dislike. Yet, there are certainly moments when TK’s feelings about people are clearly driven by his fears. Idealization allows a person to feel less anxious because it “allows them to keep the fantasy of perfection intact.” Again, this is something that fits well with the Alex storyline. In S01E05, TK even calls Alex his soulmate, despite the fact that several indicators (not living together, Owen’s skepticism, etc.) suggest that they may not have been as serious or close as TK suggested. Even after everything that happened, TK still thought Alex was his soulmate.
When someone feels threatened, they may switch from seeing someone as all good to deeming the other person as bad because it’s easier to deal with someone’s rejection when that person is flawed without any good attributes. Throughout the series, when TK gets upset with someone, he often gets disproportionately upset, and he feels as though he is the problem without being able to see the pain of others. For example, after he has a fight with Judd, he reduces Judd to just his flaws. Similarly, to a lesser degree, after Nancy criticizes the changes TK has made to the ambulance, TK goes on a rant on how Nancy is wrong without being able to stop and think that Nancy’s reaction is more related to her grief than to do with TK’s core character. The same is true of Judd; Judd got upset because he already lost his crew, and he didn’t want to lose his new crew. In S02E04, TK doesn’t even like Carlos explain himself before his rage (and of course the underlying fears that cause rage) takes over. While before the incident with Carlos’ parents, TK was blissfully in love and admiring Carlos, after that moment, he says hurtful things to hurt Carlos,
On the same note, people with BPD often have a “favorite person,” and Owen could represent TK’s favorite person, at least in the beginning of the show. The favorite person does not always relate to the person the BPD sufferer loves most. Rather, it more closely relates to the most important person in someone’s life and the one who validates them. As Arzt and Troy of Choosing Therapy suggest, “The individual with BPD wants their favorite person’s attention as much as possible, and the quality of the relationship can undoubtedly shape their mood, confidence, and sense of security.” TK often puts Owen in the place of a hero.
TK idolizes Owen more than anyone else, and viewers often see him looking to Owen for a sense of direction. For example, in the season 1 finale, TK questions his role as a firefighter, which he later questions in season 2, and he goes to Owen for help. He expresses his feelings of abandonment, which is one of the core fears he has, and Owen responds by telling TK how many firefighters died on 9/11 and justifying his absence, and the conversation feels familiar, like Owen has shared that statistic every time this conversation has come up. The important part of this moment is that when Owen starts talking about 9/11, TK becomes quieter and more fidgety. He shuts down that line of thought, and he defers to Owen. It felt very much like a defense mechanism because TK knew that to keep his father’s affection, he had to repress his feelings and concerns.
Of course, TK’s silence cannot last forever, and we see him pulling away from Owen is season 2 and starting to acknowledge his dad’s flaws. In S02E04, after blowing up at Carlos, he sees his parents inability to communicate well with one another, and through the realization as their flaws, he can then go back to Carlos and be more understanding. Through personal growth, he’s been able to think less in extremes and moderate some of his fear-fueled thoughts. And after Owen makes that comment about being a father again, TK eventually decides to become a paramedic (a career change that the season 1 finale hinted at when he saved the woman from the bus with his medical skills). He’s in a much happier headspace in season 2, and part of that is because of his healthier relationships and also because he starts to detach himself from Owen and some of his idealization.
TK’s mood varies greatly in the show, which reflects his potential, “affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood.” TK can go from one intense emotion to another. People with BPD are often incredibly sensitive, and they feel like they are exposed nerves. Shari Y. Manning describes in her book, Loving Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder how “People with BPD have an exquisite vulnerability to emotions.” In many of the scenes and storylines listed, viewers see TK’s emotions shifting unexpectedly. People with BPD often react more extremely than average people would, both in their emotions and responses.
TK is prone to outbursts of anger and emotional intensity. When he’s been set off, he struggles to return to his baseline. As we see in S01E03, when TK is on a date with Carlos, he cannot stop talking about his grudge with Judd, even though TK already blew off his steam getting into his bar fight, got detained by the police, and had additional time between those moments. Most people would have cooled down, but TK still seems rageful. Judd seems stubborn as he expresses his concerns to Grace, but even he doesn’t still have the heat that TK does. Overall, TK’s emotions are more volatile and prone to fast changes than those of other characters. Sometimes, he’s nervously fidgeting. Sometimes, he’s angry and loudly picking fights. Sometimes, he’s depressed and quiet. He has a range of emotions that can shift without much notice.
An “inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger” is one of the symptoms that is most explicit in TK’s behavior. Clearly, this relates substantially to his emotional intensity and moodiness. Anger is certainly one of his default emotions, and when he’s hurt, it’s the part of him that comes out. The anger he has in S01E03 established his angry response several times in one episode. He gets into a shoving match with Judd and then starts another fight, but there are other examples of his anger. For instance, in S02E11, when Owen is arrested for being an arsonist due to a plan by him and Carlos’ dad, TK gest physical with Carlos and physically and verbally pushes him away. This physical response is not the marker of a healthy relationship or response to emotions. Of course, it’s important to note that it’s not right to assume that people with BPD will be violent or dangerous, but physical altercations can be a result of BPD, and they are in TK’s case.
People with BPD also experience an “identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self,” which TK no doubt experiences. For example, in the season 1 finale, he not only doesn’t know if he wants to still be a firefighter, but he doesn’t know if he wants to be in a relationship with Carlos. After nearly dying from a gunshot wound in S01E08, he struggles to figure out his place on the world, and this is basically the conversation he has with Zoe later, who is his dad’s vaguely girlfriend. He looked for an outside source, just trying to figure out what to do because a lot of his other relationships were complicated at that moment (his dad, Carlos). Of course, all this would be fairly normal with a near-death experience, but TK’s indecision and uncertainty seem to have deeper roots. When he wakes up from his coma, in many ways, he is waking up from a dissociative state, where he was going through the motions and trying to deal with the lingering pain. He was emerging from the gray of his life into the color, showing how his inability to know himself and what he wants leads to him feel deprived and even possible dissociative.
While there are no strong ties to TK having “transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms,” it can be argued that he has dissociative symptoms on at least some level. For example, the police station scene in S01E03 explains a lot about TK’s mental state. He expresses feeling numb, and that numbness can cause a person to feel disconnected to themselves, and often, TK doesn’t even know who he is or what he wants.
Throughout the first season especially but also into season 2, TK is lost because what he knew himself as— son to an infallible hero, boyfriend to Alex, firefighter, New Yorker— was all called into question. The first episode marks a transition. Even Owen’s cancer shakes the view that TK has of Owen as being a hero who always wins, rather than as a real human who is bound to die. That realization must shake his world because the cancer makes TK confront some of his fears, just as Buttercup represents TK’s fears of abandonment (due to death in this instance), and TK refuses to love Buttercup because he is afraid of loss, which correlates to how emotionally shut down he is in season 1 despite wanting to feel closer to others to fill his core needs. Thus, while dissociative symptoms are never mentioned, TK does experience detachment as a coping mechanism because if he can distance himself from everyone and everything that might give him joy, he can never feel pain.
TK also experiences, “recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behaviors.” For example, the fight he gets into at the bar in S01E03 could count as self-harm because the set-up of the fight makes it pretty clear that a fight was exactly what TK intended when he walked into the bar, and really, going to a bar at all was self-destructive because no matter what behavior TK chose to do (fighting, drinking, or even in certain instance trying to find a guy to have sex with) could count as not just reckless but destructive. He was in no state of mind do act in a healthy way. He was intentionally trying to hurt, trying to feel something. Accordingly, the self-harming behaviors seem fitting.
Beyond the self-harm, we have potential suicidal thoughts and actions. When Owen asks TK in the pilot if he was trying to kill himself after his overdose, there was a beat too long between the answer, and TK’s expression shifted noticeably. This moment could suggest that despite TK’s answer of “No,” that he may have had some suicidal intentions, even if they were just, “I’ll take these pills and leave it to fate if I live or die.” Furthermore, because Owen thought to ask, there may have been signs that indicated intentional overdose, or TK may have had a history that supported that conclusion. We also know that Ronen Rubenstein played TK as suicidal as he mentioned in his Pop Cultarish interview, which suggests that was his intention for the scene and possibly the director’s/writer’s intentions. In any case, TK’s behaviors are concerning and do point to at least thoughts of suicide.
TK also tends to, “impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging.” The clearest area of TK’s impulsivity is his addiction, but he is also impulsive in other ways. For example, when he picks the fight with Judd after the grain silo and then goes to a bar to pick another fight in S01E03, which is an episode that highlights a lot of TK’s mental illness. Often, when TK is impulsive, he does so in a way that could get him hurt, and sometimes, he does to promote hurt.
The impulsive behavior associated most with TK is his substance use. Addiction and substance abuse are often comorbid with BPD, which research has long shown. This updated 2018 review by Trull et al. uses over 100 studies on the association between substance use disorders and BPD. Across the studies reviewed, the researchers determined that 57.4% of people with BPD had substance use disorders as well. Furthermore, the American Addiction Centers suggests that, in one survey, among people who requested buprenorphine to treat opioid addiction, 40% also had BPD. Furthermore, 50% of BPD patients experienced prescription drug abuse. While substance abuse can certainly occur without BPD, in conjunction with other BPD symptoms, it is telling.
The show implicitly links TK’s addiction, self-harming, and reckless behaviors with the anger and emptiness he feels. People with BPD commonly experience feelings of “chronic emptiness.” In S01E03, after TK’s bar fight, he confesses to Carlos that he wanted to feel something, and ever since he arrived in Texas, he felt gray and numb. While these symptoms can relate to depression, they can also relate to the emptiness characteristic of BPD, as a result of other common BPD issues, such as a lack of a sense of an identity, feelings of unworthiness, loss of direction, feeling misunderstood, or wanting but failing to have meaningful relationships. TK wants to feel, but he also has defensive mechanisms that numb him from his feelings because his feelings are often so intense.
TK acts outwardly in fights, and when he’s fighting, he puts on a tough act, not showing anyone the intense feelings happening within, but there’s a lot more going on inside of him. He also directs that anger inward and does things he know will hurt himself. After his fight with Judd, he’s emotionally spiraling, and the viewers see this as he goes to a bar fittingly named The Trap. While he may be tempted to drink alcohol, he doesn’t give into that urge and chooses mineral water; instead, he picks a fight with two guys, acting smug and unbreakable. Moments later, he is sat in front of Carlos, any semblance of the arrogance and confidence he has in his fights is gone.
While the symptoms could be interpreted in other ways that don’t reflect BPD, many of the symptoms fit TK too well to be a coincidence, while the others can be applied with certain interpretive lenses. Thus, it’s clear to me that TK has BPD symptoms, which doesn’t mean that he has BPD, but many of his thought patterns do have an uncanny likeness to those with BPD, and ultimately, BPD shows itself in a myriad of ways. Some experts have grouped the condition into four groups to more clearly define the way the condition can present itself. The point is that BPD, like any other condition, doesn’t have a one size fit all explanation or set of symptoms. Whether TK has BPD or not, his thoughts and behaviors are frequently a result of his mental illness, and he shows the reality for many people with various types of mental illness.
i really hope that maggie finishes this off in a better way than the raven cycle in terms of situations and problems.
a part of me agrees, but a part of me is like, was i satisfied when trk first came out? only semi. has it held my attention and sustained me emotionally enough that i'm still in this fandom years later invested as fuck and rereading the books annually? Yessir. i tend to trust her as a writer tbh, especially since when she was finishing trc she wasn't in a great space health wise, so things can only be better, and they were already fine by me
Message box is closed to people you don't follow, but I love your art so much omg!! Do you do commissions or art trades or something bc 👀👀👀👀 Thanks! <3<3
OHhh thanks!! I apreciate!! And Sadly i don’t do none of both sorry :/
but i might open commissions one day! So keep tunned!
folks, i got a fair bit of yes/no type of questions about the book. i will answer most of them (they don't give away the entire plot, and people are invested), but with the way i personally like to consume my spoilers (fresh, hot, subjective, vague) i know i wouldn't want to read them. some people do and that's cool! just beware before you click on read more with these. if it's a yes/no question there's gonna be a yes/no answer under the cut, just, like, be sure you're ready to hear it ❤️
