#mirandabird

[stillpixilated]

My Mom sent this to me this morning 🤣 Happy Mother’s Day to all the human, animal and mineral moms out there! #happymothersday #birdiewatching #mirandabird (at Bellville, Texas) https://www.instagram.com/p/BxYOlFFHNEm/?igshid=anmjjlwxph5m

[stillpixilated]

Have you ever seen more beautiful boy? #birdiewatching #MirandaBird (at Bellville, Texas) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bwk6gZTH4bo/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1l5j13f82sfrm

[here-there--and--everywhere]

Dear Miranda,

[here-there--and--everywhere]

Me: (referring to boy) yummy yummy yummy!!!

Miranda: I got love in my tummy!!

(simultaneously)

Miranda: I quote baby food commercials

Me: GASP! Intercourse...

Miranda:

Me:

Miranda:

Me: Or baby food commercials...

Miranda: HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

[here-there--and--everywhere]

Reasons why I love my friends (Part 3!)

Me: I don't even know what to do!

Miranda: Shave her head.

Miranda: And eyebrows.

Miranda: Then go from there.

[here-there--and--everywhere]

You know you're going to a Gotye concert when:

Miranda: I LOVE HIM.

Me: MEEEEEEE TOOOOOOO

Miranda: WE WILL BE NEAR HIM TOMORROW NIGHT

Me: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Miranda: HOPFULLY HE'LL SWEAT ON US.

Me: I. WOULD. DIE!!!!!!!

Miranda: Urination due to excitement.

Me: Me. Too.

[here-there--and--everywhere]

I received this message from my darling, wonderful Miranda and I decided it was too good not to share as a post:

"i wrote you a poem

roses are blue 

violets are red

im bad with colors, but im wicked in bed.

did i write that? i dunno… but anyways. im gonna call you later.

i hope you enjoyed my really pointless message… WHORESON JOLTHEAD!"