When I wake to realize he left for work long ago.. 🥺 #thisiswhattranslookslike #transisbeautiful #truetranssoulrebel #girlslikeus #missyoubabe https://www.instagram.com/p/CFHthl4nHEw/?igshid=1735kj4sc733a
Okay, folks, before Christmas hits I have to post at least the beginning of this chapter, which - as the moodboard shows so bluntly - is about 8 weeks old. Well what can I say: real life got in my way, but beware, I am on holidays now😘
Thanks again @mintjamsblog and here you go @jackson--t I can't keep up with your workload, but let yourself be surprised.
🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃
October, 31st
Heahmund had gotten up early to finally finish, then submitting his article and still have enough time to make changes if requested.
There was something else he had to take care of, something important and today was just perfect for it. Ivar loved Halloween and a spooky movie was always a great reason to cuddle up together.
After a short but fast 5K through a nearby park, Heahmund was full of energy. He knew there was a lot the two of them had to discuss, finally talk about openly, but he was all up for it. There was no exact need for him to run through the beautiful autumn leaves and Ivar better didn’t think he was an easy to trick fool.
Heahmund looked happily at the two pairs of keys on his living room table and thought that two really was their number.
It had been two weeks - and no, he was not ready to admit that it had probably been more like two days…or even hours – after they had met for the first time, that he had known Ivar was the one and only. The one he wanted to move mountains for, cross oceans for, the one… who was still living with his family he mumbled, amused, on his way to the shower. But there was nothing that couldn’t be changed, right?
While hot water pattered on his neck he had to smile again, thinking about last night. An unbelievable wave of warmth and affection washed over him, overwhelming him so much that he reached for the faucet, feeling slightly dizzy.
Since meeting Ivar half a year ago Heahmund had been so much happier. Sometimes he still couldn’t truly believe his luck.
It had been a wild ride. Around two weeks into dating Ivar, Aslaug had confiscated her son’s mobile without Heahmund being aware. When he wanted to leave his apartment, he found himself face to face with a very angry, yet uncomfortable looking Ragnar, who was just about to hammer on his door.
What followed was the strangest and somehow most adorable talk Heahmund had ever had with a sturdy guy like Ragnar. During the “I hear you are dating my son,” talk, Heahmund was taken aback by the deep love both parents felt for their youngest son. But there was something more. He had of course realised before that Ivar sometimes stumbled a bit or walked as if in slight pain, but the young man had always been quick to explain it away. “I worked out too hard,” or “I got into a fight with Sigurd.”
And although the heart-breaking explanation — that Ivar had been in a near fatal car crash when he was a young teenager — helped explain his behaviour, it didn’t help Heahmund to talk about it with Ivar straight away.
He had sworn to Ragnar, and a furious Aslaug (who had a pretty good picture about the two of them due to knowing her son and his passwords very well) that he wouldn’t tell Ivar his parents were already in the known. Therefore, he couldn’t admit to knowing about the accident.
Then the first time Ivar and he wanted to have sex, turned into a tearful disaster when he couldn’t hide his pity at seeing the scars on Ivar’s legs. All Heahmund wanted to do was hold Ivar in a strong hug and let him know “I don’t care about the scars. I care about you. You are everything to me.” but he couldn't admit to knowing about the accident, and Ivar read his hesitation as rejection and ran off.
Heahmund was convinced he’d lost his precious, broken angel that night. Instead of enjoying each other completely for the first time and devouring the other’s body, he had to witness how Ivar was overcome with shame. It looked as if Ivar couldn't stand Heahmud seeing his battered legs and had fled the apartment in such a hurry that he forgot his mobile phone.
The next day, Hvitserk was sent over by Ivar to get the phone back for his brother.
Thanks to Hvitserk’s kind heart and desire that his baby brother would be happy, and due to the irresistible smell of the comfort food Heahmund was preparing himself after that disastrous night, the two men sat down, shared some warm pancakes with whipped cream and strawberries and became friends.
It was Heahmund himself who gave Ivar his phone back in the end, but only after they had sat down and Heahmund heard, for the third time, about the horrible car crash that had nearly cost Ivar his life.
Although the water in the shower was still burning hot, Heahmund shivered, thinking back to a shaken, insecure, and ashamed Ivar who had explained to him through sobs, and with the help of his brother’s hugs, that he had not only fought for his life, but had nearly lost his ability to walk. His legs had been broken several times and only multiple surgeries and lengthy, stressful rehabilitation had brought him to his current state of weak but mostly working legs and chronic pain.
Heahmund got out of the shower and reached through the steamy fog for his mobile.
9:30 am
H: Hey, you awake?
H: I miss you❤
I: Hey, hearty😉
Heahmund wanted to text more, or, even better, call Ivar, but just then his editor called. With dripping hair, he rushed back to his notebook and….got lost in work.
°~~~°
When Ivar next opened his eyes, 9:56 amradiated mercilessly from his mobile’s display. It was unusual for him to fall asleep again once he was up, especially when his boyfriend had already texted. Thinking of Heahmund, Ivar screwed his eyes up a bit and looked again at the too-bright display. He expected to see at least one, if not more messages.
When there was not a single notification Ivar huffed, frowned, and wanted to lift himself up, but a sharp pain shot through his legs.
“Fuck” he exhaled letting himself fall back immediately. There he had the explanation for his exhaustion and sleeping in.
“Damn, not today” Ivar hissed after a few moments of trying to breathe calmly and not glide into a panic.
Distraction, yeah, he needed to distract himself and he wanted Heahmund, why the heck didn’t he answer? Shivering a bit, although he already felt sweat forming on his forehead, Ivar reached for his mobile and typed:
I: Playing hard to get? First a ❤and then nothing?
10:15 am
I: Babe?
Five minutes later panic crawled up with her icy fingers, crawled from Ivar’s hurting toes up to his fast-beating heart.
I: Hvit, you heard from your best buddy?
Hvit: ? Good morning to you too, my dear brother. Who are you talking about?
I: Heagh. He texted me and I haven’t heard back.
“Goddam it!” The minute he pressed send, Ivar realized how pathetic he sounded and braced himself for a mocking answer from his brother.
Hvit: Seriously? Gosh, maybe his battery died. Or he is busy.
Ivar tried to shift in his bed again to get up, but the pain had only grown worse.
I: You busy?
Hvit: I’ve got a wife and a baby. I’m always busy.
Ivar pressed his lips together and reached back to his nightstand. With trembling fingers, he fumbled through the drawer where he kept an emergency-pack of pain killers.
“Thank god” he whispered when his mobile vibrated.
Hvit: U ok?
Only when he had to blink twice to sharpen the letters did Ivar realize that his eyes were all teary; he brushed the wetness away angrily. His brother had sensed what was going on. Otherwise he wouldn’t have asked again. And he knew, Hvitserk, the favourite of his brothers, would understand his way to ask for help:
I: Yeah. Happy Halloween.
Hvit: Happy Halloween, liar.
Ivar huffed and, when there was no further message from his brother, concentrated on getting out of bed and into the shower.
*~~*
Two hours later Hvitserk used his spare key to open the door to his little brother’s apartment. Just as he stepped in, his brother stumbled towards him and landed awkwardly in his arms, his face pained.
“Wow, brother!”
“Hvitty.”
“Hvitty, hm? How bad?” and with these strict words, Hvitserk supported his younger brother back to the kitchen table to sit down again.
“A five,” Ivar mumbled and added a frustrated, “maybe six,” under Hvitserk’s scrutinizing gaze.
“I suppose you’ve taken something already?”
“’Course. It was slightly better after the shower.”
“Okay then let’s try some more warmth.” Hvitserk supported Ivar over to the living room sofa. Midway through their journey Ivar made him stop, pointing back at the colourful cookie-jar Hvitserk had brought with him.
Once at his sofa Hvitserk tugged him in a fluffy blanket and went back to the kitchen to prepare some heat pads. While they were heated up in the microwave, he handed Ivar a glass of water and some more pain killers. He knew they would make his brother sleepy, which was exactly what he hoped for.
Ivar’s eyes were already closed when Hvitserk laid the heat pads carefully on his legs.
“You staying?” Ivar asked.
“Of course I’ll stay, dumbass. Now sleep.”
When Ivar’s breathing got deeper and slower, Hvitserk crept to Ivar’s bedroom. Closing the door behind him he dialled Heahmund’s number but only got the mailbox.
“Listen, idiot. It’s Halloween, my brother loves this day, it’s important to him. He told me hours ago he can’t reach you, so what’s up? Text me.”
He wanted to call his wife but decided to send her a text instead. Without hearing her lovely voice and the crying from their baby he wouldn’t feel so torn; he missed them badly each time he left the house.
Hvit: Honey, Ivar is having a really bad day and is in pain. We can’t reach Heahmund so I’d better stay with him for a while since he’s on pain killers. Ok? Love you!❤
