#mistletoinks

[seatawinan]

@mistletoinks Merry Christmas Rose @b-iconpearl! 💜💗💙

[patandpran]

Only Time will Tell 

Sarawat and Tine have been best friends since they were five, when Tine walked into a classroom terrified of everyone and saw Sarawat silently playing a xylophone in the corner. This chronicles their experience growing up together and realizing that maybe they could be more than just friends? But only time will tell....

Written for Jay aka @metawin for the @mistletoinks Secret Santa 2020. I’m so sorry it took so long but I hope you like it and I hope you are enjoying the festive season!

Five.

“No, Mom! I don’t want to go.”

Tine dug his heels in as his Mother pushed him toward the classroom door. He clawed and kicked but ultimately this was a fight he was going to lose. His Mom knelt down in front of him and gently grasped his shoulders.

“Tine, we talked about this.” His mother shared. “You have to breathe. There’s nothing to be scared of. Inhale. Exhale.”

“But they’re all going to hate me.” Tears sprung to Tine’s eyes as his Mother tried to reason with him. “I won’t make any friends and then I’ll have to play alone. ALONE!”

“You are a lovely young man.” His mother assured him. “You are kind, bright and you have a great imagination. Kids will be lining up play with you and even if they don’t, you’re going to learn so much at school. I promise you will learn to love it.”

Tine finally admitted defeat. He knew that, in some ways, his Mom was right. Type, his older brother, loved school and had lots of friends even though he was so quiet. If Type could do it, Tine could too.

“Okay.” Tine adjusted his backpack straps and wiped away his tears with the back of his hand. “I’m going to be brave today.”

“I never doubted you for a second.” His Mom responded as she stood to her full height again before gently pushing him through the door. “I’ll be here to pick you up later. I can’t wait to hear about your first day.”

As Tine walked into the classroom, children were already hustling and bustling everywhere. He took another deep breath in and headed toward a row of hooks where he hung up his backpack and changed into his indoor shoes.

One half of the classroom had a bunch of toys that students were playing with while the other part had comfy looking bean bags and a big colourful carpet. In the far corner, though, there was a little nook where a boy was sitting on his own. He was studying what looked to be a xylophone and was very focused on his examination. Tine felt instantly at ease, even just by looking at the fellow student and found himself gravitating toward him.

Tine crossed the classroom but didn’t want to disturb whatever the boy was doing. He silently sat a few feet away from his peer to observe him. A few moments went by and Tine felt himself relaxing. The boy didn’t even seem to notice him as he was so engrossed in his activity.

But then, suddenly, he looked up and held out the instrument toward Tine, “Do you want a turn?”

Tine wasn’t sure how to respond so he just slowly nodded and took the xylophone from the boy. The boy looked at him expectantly so Tine lifted the mallet and dropped it against the keys. The sound that it emitted wasn’t horrible but it wasn’t exactly pleasant either.

“No, no, no.” The boy shook his head and Tine cringed slightly. He should have known better to put himself out there like this. His greatest fear was rejection and within five minutes in the class, the first person he approached was already judging him.

The boy crawled closer to Tine and Tine was shocked to see a smile on the boy’s lips. “Sorry. That was rude of me. I mean… do you want me to show you how to play a song?”

Tine felt sudden relief. It seemed like the boy was just as awkward as he was. Tine passed the mallet to the boy but kept the instrument in his hands. He played a simple three note melody and then passed it back to Tine who played it back to the best of his ability, his hands shaking nervously the whole time.

“See, that was great!” The boy’s eyes lit up and his grin grew even bigger. “I’m Sarawat, by the way, but you can call me ‘Wat’ if you want….I think… well, do you want to be my friend?”

And just like that, Tine had made his first friend.

Ten.

Sarawat and Tine were inseparable.

Wherever one of them went, the other was right there. Whenever they weren’t in the same class, they would meet up at every break to check in with one another to see how their days were going.

As long as Sarawat was at his side, Tine felt like he could take on the world. They were best friends and while they didn’t have a lot in common in terms of interests, it didn’t matter. That first day of school where Tine had approached Sarawat had linked them together in a way that was unspoken and sacred.

Their favourite thing to do was listen to music in their rooms. Tine would hang his head off the end of the bed while Sarawat would guitar along with whatever song Tine would choose. Tine was always the DJ as Sarawat was happy to listen to whatever his best friend chose as long as it had a guitar line that he could investigate and pick apart.

Tine had never been particularly interested in learning an instrument where Sarawat had taken up the guitar as if it was a birthright. Tine was happy to bob his head along to the music and sometimes hum if he was feeling a bit bolder. Tine’s favourite moment during their listening sessions were when Sarawat would get so lost in the music that he would start to sing without knowing. Tine loved the sound of his friend’s voice but he knew how self-conscious Sarawat was about it so he never mentioned it. Tine savoured those moments.

Tine didn’t want to share Sarawat with anyone else. Wat was his best friend and, thankfully, neither of them seemed too interested in expanding their friend group beyond some interactions at school.

Their free time was shared between their houses equally and they never invited a third…

Fifteen.

The football soared over Tine’s head. It was lunch and, once again, Sarawat had dragged him out to the field. It wasn’t that Tine didn’t enjoy the game, he just wasn’t particularly good at it and all of Sarawat’s new friends seemed to notice that.

Over their ten years as friends, Tine had grown much more outgoing while Sarawat became quieter and quieter. Tine often spoke on Sarawat’s behalf but Sarawat had the uncanny ability to be good at absolutely everything he tried so just as Tine originally had, people wanted to be his friend whether he gave them the time of day or not.

“Tine! Grab the ball.” Man, one of Sarawat’s friends called out.

Tine grumbled a complaint under his breath but he wasn’t about to start a fight over something as stupid as this. He ran to grab the ball and tossed it back toward Man who gave him a sympathetic look in return.

Boss, Man and Sarawat were the strongest football players in their grade which had quickly bonded them. Tine usually stood on the sidelines while they played their scrimmages even if Sarawat tried to make him play.

“Sarawat is such a good player.” Fong mused as he wandered up besides Tine, Ohm quickly following behind. “You’re so lucky to be his friend.”

Ohm, Fong, Phuak and Tine were all in the same class and had slowly grown closer since the beginning of the school year, especially since Sarawat had started to spend every moment of his free time on the football field.

“Why aren’t you out there, Tine?” Ohm asked and earned himself an elbow in the ribs from Fong.

“I just…. uh… I don’t really like sports that much.” Tine shrugged and tried to hide the shame that was spreading through him.

“You know what’s better than playing sports?” Phuak appeared out of nowhere, as per usual and startled all three boys. “EATING! You guys should come to my place after school to try some new snacks that my brother just brought back from Japan.”

“Sure!” Ohm and Fong agreed and then they all looked to Tine expectantly.

Tine looked out to the field where Sarawat was still clearly engrossed in his game. Sarawat tended to spend his every after school alternating between guitar practice and football so Tine doubted that his friend would notice if he wasn’t free for once.

“Yah.” Tine nodded. “That sounds good.”

The school bell rang and the students began to make their way inside. As usual, Tine hung back to wait for Sarawat to join him.

Sarawat ran over to him and blurted, “Thanks for waiting. Hey, by the way, what are you doing after school?”

Tine’s mouth grew dry. “I made plans with Phuak, Fong and Ohm. Why?”

A look of undeniable disappointment crossed Sarawat’s face that made Tine’s stomach twist in a way he didn’t like.

Sarawat’s eyes dropped to the ground, “Oh. I was going to ask if you wanted to listen to music… like old times.”

“Sorry.” Tine muttered and then saw Man and Boss making their way toward Sarawat. A pang of jealousy flowed through him and he shared, “Why don’t you ask one of your football friends? You practically spend every waking moment with them anyway.”

Another look of hurt crossed over Sarawat’s face and his breath hitched, “Wait. What do you mean? I want to spend time with you. We’ve just been so busy lately.”

“No.” Tine hissed and he could hear the frustration clear as day in his now tone. “You’ve been busy lately so the one time I have something to do with my friends, you act as if I’ve done something wrong for not being free.”

“That’s not true!” Sarawat protested just as Man and Boss each threw an arm around his shoulders.

“Everything okay here?” Man asked, his brow furrowed in concern.

“You guys look like you’re breaking up.” Boss chuckled lightheartedly and Tine felt a fierce blush take over his cheeks.

“Shut up, Boss.” Sarawat muttered, looking away from Tine in clear embarrassment.

That’s what Tine was to Sarawat now. An embarrassment. They used to be so close and now a clear rift was appearing between the two of them. Friends couldn’t stay friends forever and Tine sensed that this was a shift to something else. They lived in two different worlds. They didn’t have enough in come to stand the test of time.

“I’ll see you guys later.” Tine turned quickly on his heel to escape the three football players.

He didn’t want them to see him cry as he stalked back toward the school entrance. He didn’t want to add fuel to the already burning fire.

Tine and Sarawat’s friendship was clearly fading even though neither of them wanted to admit it.

Seventeen.

“Sarawat and Tine, you will be partners for the assignment.”

Tine felt his heart leap into his throat as the teacher made the announcement. Sarawat and he had not spoken in a while. While it had not been a full blown ‘break up’ of their friendship, they both had slowly become involved with their own friend groups and activities and grown apart over the past few years.

Fong put a supportive hand down on Tine’s shoulder. Fong had kind of stepped into Sarawat’s role of ‘best friend’ when they started drifting apart and Fong had consoled Tine through the whole experience. He appreciate his friend’s support but when he looked over at Sarawat, he was shocked to see that his former friend had an inviting smile on his lips.

It had never been that Sarawat had been mean to him. Tine had just felt less and less comfortable contacting him, especially as Sarawat’s popularity grew. The curios thing about Sarawat being so popular, especially with the girls at their school, was how little Sarawat seemed to care or be interested in it. Tine would give anything to be widely accepted by his peers while Sarawat was just handed it because of his natural good lucks and talent. It made Tine terribly jealous which was another reason he had stopped hanging out with Sarawat.

“Please sit next to your partners. You need to get started right away.”

Fong gave Tine an encouraging push across the classroom and Tine groaned inwardly as he made his way over to Sarawat who already had an empty seat next to him. Tine was shocked when Sarawat pulled the seat out for him and gestured welcomingly toward it. It made Tine suspicious but he figured Sarawat was just trying to be overly friendly to make him feel comfortable. Tine settled into the chair and unpacked his things as Sarawat openly stared at him.

“Long time, no talk.” Tine blurted out when he couldn’t handle the silence any longer.

“Yah.” Sarawat agreed, looking down at his notebook. “I’ve been meaning to call you.”

“You don’t have to say that.” Tine clarified, a hint of annoyance in his voice. “We drifted apart. It happens. We grew up. Don’t even worry about it.”

Sarawat met Tine’s gaze again and there was quite a broken look in his eyes that melted some of the ice between them. Tine still knew he couldn’t completely relax around Sarawat or let his guard down or else he might get hurt again.

“Well, either way, I’m sorry.” Sarawat expressed. “And, if you’ll let me, I’d like to try to be your friend again. You’re important to me. I’ve just been a bit too lame to approach you. I was worried you hated me or something.”

“I could never hate you.” The words passed through Tine’s lips before he could think them through.

This earned him a grin from Sarawat who shared, “I couldn’t either. I’ve missed you a lot.” “Oh.” Tine breathed out. There was a weight to Sarawat’s words that terrified Tine. “I mean, uh, I’m just surprised to hear that.”

“Really?” Sarawat’s brows knotted together in confusion. “I’ve practically always forced my friendship on you…”

Tine’s eyes widened in surprise. “What the hell are you talking about? I thought I was the one annoying you by following you around all the time.”

“I would practically drag you anywhere I went.” Sarawat responded, an amused look on his face. “It sounds like we both had a skewed version in our heads. Maybe that’s why everything ended like it did…”

“That’s the thing about endings though.” Tine answered boldly. “Endings mean that you get to have a new beginning.”

Sarawat’s eyes lit up with all that Tine could classify as hope. Sarawat stuck his hand out to Tine and questioned, “Friends?”

“Friends.” Tine agreed, taking Sarawat’s hand.

Tine tried not to read too much into how natural his hand felt when it was in Sarawat’s.

He was finally friends with Sarawat again. He couldn’t ask for anything more.

Eighteen.

Sarawat and Tine were hanging out in Tine’s room, just like they used to when they were younger. This time, however, they were both lying on the bed instead of Sarawat taking up his usual perch in Tine’s desk chair. What stayed the same, though, was that Tine was the one choosing the music and Sarawat still had a guitar in his hands.

In the middle of one of Tine’s favourite Scrubb songs, Sarawat had started to sing. Tine closed his eyes and listened to the sound of his returned best friend’s voice. It sounded much more mature and full-bodied than before. Sarawat’s voice was smooth and vulnerable, with a hint of abandon and shakiness at the same time. Tine loved it more than anything.

Unfortunately, they were interrupted by the sound of Sarawat’s cell phone going off. Tine shot up and paused the music. Sarawat reached over to silence the phone but Tine gave him a shrug that was meant to encourage his friend to pick up the call.

“It’s just Man.” Sarawat explained. “He probably just wants to ask if Type is around. He knows I’m at your house right now.”

“Would you ignore me if I called?” Tine teased, even though he was actually secretly interested in knowing the answer.

“Of course not.” Sarawat shook his head. “It’s different.”

“How?” The question hung in the air and the atmosphere in the room quickly became full of tension.

Sarawat set down the phone and cleared his phone, “It… it just is, Tine. You know what I mean.”

“Yah, I guess I kind of have the best friend position again.” Tine chuckled awkwardly, regretting posing the question.

Tine moved to start the music again but the gesture was intercepted by Sarawat taking hold of Tine’s hand. Sarawat breathed out slowly and Tine felt suddenly like his heart was going to burst out his chest. What the hell was Sarawat doing? Why was he doing this now?

“Tine… we’ve known each other for almost fifteen years…” Sarawat began and set his guitar aside with his free hand. “In all that time, I’ve bee trying to navigate what we are.”

“What we are?” Tine repeated incredulously, his mind trying desperately to catch up with that he was hearing.

“I know you see the way I look at you, Tine.” Sarawat explained, a slight flush appearing on his cheeks. “The way I’ve always looked at you.”

“Wat…” Tine breathed out in shock as Sarawat moved closer to his so that their knees were touching.

Sarawat studied Tine’s gaze and murmured, “I don’t want to put any pressure on you if you don’t feel the same way but I can’t keep this to myself any more. It’s too much to be around you with how much I feel.”

Tine wondered if he had somehow fallen asleep listening to Sarawat singing. This felt like too much of a dream to be real. Sarawat winced slightly when Tine remained silent and started to put distance between the two of them.

Desperate not to lose him again, Tine leaned forward and captured Sarawat’s lips in his own. For a brief moment, Sarawat stilled but then quickly wrapped his arms around Tine and pulled his best friend even deeper into the kiss.

Tine’s head was spinning.

After all this time, he was kissing his best friend.

He was kissing Sarawat.

After all those years of closeness and confusion, they had finally found the moment to define what they were to one another…

…Sometimes all it took was time.

[mortal-sarah]

Hi @pangwave! I’m excited to finally introduce myself as your Secret Santa! I hope you enjoy your gift! Sorry that it’s a little late! I saw this song was on your PangWave playlist and I agree that it’s a really great fit for them, especially Wave, so I whipped this up for you! I hope you like it! Have a great rest of your year! 

 -❤️ mortal-sarah

@mistletoinks

[tobeornottotc]

Happy Christmas Darling @noona96n, talking to you has been a highlight this month. I was so excited when I got you as secret santa since we already bonded over analysing my gear and your gown. You deserve so much more than this but I hope it makes you smile. Hope you have a great year and you enjoy the new BLS hope we keep squealing about BLs together. Enjoy:

 B

The thing about Inn: Korn’s perspective Until we meet again

It’s the little things. The way he shines each time he appears in front of you. He’s breath taking, his smile makes the tightness in your chest fade away, he’s a soothing balm on your heart, you stare at him. God he’s beautiful. Does he know this, does he know how many peoples eyes linger on him and want to stay by his side forever. Does he understand how dangerous he is for people like you? How dangerous you are for people like him. You’re the darkness, you’re doomed for it, you’re doomed to not escape this path you’re in and yet he shows up with a cruel sign of hope. He’s everything to you but you can’t show him how shattered your walls are because of him. So you go back to pretending that that smile isn’t making you lose every ounce of control you’ve fought so hard to have.

It’s the stupid things. The way he runs up to you and introduces him self. ‘I’m going to love you forever’ he says with a smirk, he doesn’t flinch at all at your glare, he tilts his head to the side and takes in all of you, your turned back which holds the weight of all the pain you hold, all the burdens that load in your mind, all the tiredness you feel, your eyes that aren’t allowed to look back at his with longing and wanting though they would, they automatically should, your frown ;which actually is a mask because from just seeing him appear, from just hearing him, that frown feels false. You want to smile, you want to smirk, you want to laugh at the absurdity of how this beautiful boy thinks he’s yours. Forever. Could that be possible? Could it be possible to have him forever by your side. Stupid, things like that can’t happen and yet, the hope stays like a flame refusing to die, it stays and warms your frozen heart, it burns down your walls and it makes you breath again. It’s incredible how much stupidity can lead to the one thing that matters, the one thing that saves you time and time again. Him.

It’s the crazy things. The feeling of his touch when he leans to take something from your hair, he leans in so close, his breath tickles your cheek, you want to pull him closer, you want to make sure he stays right next to you forever. You want to keep kissing him and letting the sparks fly over and over again. He’s so bright, God he’s so bright, he’s so explosive with joy and happiness, he’s consuming, you feel pulled to him, so addicted, so obsessed. Can this be allowed? Is he allowed to be yours forever? Can you hold him for eternity without ever letting go? You want to stay here, you want to forget everything. He’s everything.

It’s the messy things. Like the way he burns the eggs each time he tries to make them for you, the way he flirts and makes cringy faces which you can’t help but want to laugh at and make fun of him for. You’re finding reasons to laugh and smile, you never thought you could be this person? Did you even know you could smile for silly reasons? Did you know it was possible to actually feel joy? Hope? Happiness? Apparently with Inn it is, apparently with him everything is possible.

It’s the silly things. The conversations that seem to be about nothing, just small talk, just little updates about life. His friends are wary of you, it’s not like he cares, it’s not like he ever cared what people thought of you. Inn sees you as his all, Inn sees you as his rock, Inn sees you as his air to breath. Inn sees you. For so long you’ve never wanted to be seen, you never wanted to be noticed, and yet now you want this beautiful light to keep seeing all of you every time. To read through you and keep seeing through you every way possible. You’ve let him have that right, you’ve let him hold your heart. It’s all his.

It’s the hard things. The way he cries when he trips because of his clumsiness. The way you want to keep protecting him and removing those hurts and scars. The way you want to keep holding him on your back and not let him go, the way you lose your mind at the thought of anyone breaking his spirit and joy. It’s the way you feel thousand cuts at seeing him cry, it’s something that shouldn’t be felt, it makes you feel angry, protective, delirious with determination to remove any obstacle that tries to hurt him. Inn is the one thing in your life that should be protected and safe at all cost. Inn is the one person in your life that should be given everything he wants. Because he saved you. And you will keep on fighting to save him too time and time again

You’re looking at him still worried you could hurt him, you’re upset that you were such a coward for leaving him, for hurting him, for breaking him. You let something come and take away that bright smile, you let something come and ruin that wonderful person’s spirit. It’s not fair, you don’t deserve him and yet you’re together forever now, he’s smiling again, his hands interlinked, both walking into the brightness filled with peace and joy. You’re with his smile, his heart is beating right next to yours where he should always be, his touch is back on yours stamped and never fading, and you guys feel you’ve made it, never to be pulled apart ever again.

 It’s the thing about Inn, he’s the light in the dark for you, the air when you’re drowning, the water in the desert, the rain to the fire, he’s everything and more. And you’re just so happy he’s all yours. And will always be forever more.  

Korn

@mistletoinks

[noona96n]

for the lovely @lesbwheein​, from ur @mistletoinks​ santa~ 💖

merry christmas & happy new year my darling  🎄 🎁 🌟 i hope you have a wonderful holiday 💖

read the accompanying fic here

[ficklefackle]

Merry Christmas 🎄 From your Secret Santa 🧑‍🎄

It’s been a pleasure meeting you and getting to know more about you this month, I have enjoyed visiting your page and look forward to visiting in the new year!

For the New Year~ my hopes for you~

- get to travel 🧳 (safely after COVID) and collect postcards with amazing views of where you have visited

-get to see music concerts (I miss going this year)

-get to see the new Marvel movies and watch all the kdrama shows you want!

Have a great Christmas Holiday weekend and I pray a Healthy New Year!!

Pose4photo

AHHH THIS IS THE CUTEST THING I’VE RECEIVED??? thank you so much for this!!! <333 i can’t believe you combined all the loves in my life and your wishes are too sweet  (πーπ) i’m glad we had the chance to get to know each other better and hopefully, we can talk more in the future!! merry christmas and happy new year to you too!!! :DDD

[noona96n]

Secret santa here! Hope you're having a good time this month and watching a lot of good shows. My plans are always the same, stay with family and cook a lot. I'm having so much fun with manner of death what are you thinking of it so far? Wishing you a great week :)

omg, my secret santa can cook 🥺🥺🥺 i want food now haha, can i have ur food instead of fandom related stuff?

-

asfgkdijkl im loving manner of death sO MUCH!!!! it's great so far

im loving the fact that they're not emphasizing too much on the bl... they just happen to be gay (or bi)

and i love MD so much!!! he was so cute in that dress haha

and and Jane... i love her but she's a bit shady tbh... i also started wearing my hair like her too lol

and Bunn & Tan... i- Max & Tul are SO good, their performances are A+++, esp Tul, when he acted out the murder at the end of ep2

(that scene also gave me a lot of hannibal vibe, so... hannibal au Bunn/Tan anyone?)

[patandpran]

hihiii, merry christmas!! secret santa is secret no more hehe! i hope you’ve enjoyed the run up to christmas, i’m sorry i haven’t been able to talk to you more! but i’m sending you lots of love and all the christmas goodness <3

Hello!!!

Oh my goodness! So happy to finally “meet” you. Haha

I hope you had a great day as well and thank you so much for the beautiful gifts! They’re so cute and made me so happy!! 💚💚💚

Xx Cass