jongtae - window / daisies (the flowers) / time
"Taemin used to draw windows. And he’d number them, all the way from 1 to 30 or 31 or sometimes 28 or 29. Like a calender. Don’t tell him though, it’s not a calender he’ll say. It’s a window with 30 days, 31 days, 28 days, maybe one will have 29 days. Taemin looked out of his window everyday. That’s why he drew these windows, each day he’d draw what he had seen outside.
Today someone moved in across the street. Taemin can see them from his window. He drew the window, numbered it 20. Within the window he makes a dinosaur, a brown ground and a moving truck. The boy who moved in with the family across the street is four years older than Taemin. He has big nostrils and a big mouth. Taemin can see this from the way he laughs while playing with his dog. Maybe that boy is the same as Taemin and likes to draw windows. Maybe not.
Maybe not. Because it’s been a few months and Taemin is on window number 20 again. The across house has white patches along it. The dinosaur boy made those patches. Taemin likes to stay in his room and stare out at that dinosaur boy with the big nostrils and white teeth. His teeth match those patches.
More months pass and everything is white as those pearly whites of his. Taemin still enjoys being inside. Maybe the dinosaur boy has noticed him staring out the window. Maybe not.
Maybe. Because Taemin’s mother opens the door one winter day and the boy asks for the other boy looking out the window. The dinosaur boy noticed. Taemin has to stop drawing the window but that’s easy because snow is white, paper is white. The house across is blue so he’ll have to redo that part. Taemin slides off his chair, puts on his scarf and jacket and hat then goes outside to play with the dinosaur boy.
"I’m Jonghyun."
"I’m Taemin."
They start playing in the snow. Taemin follows what Jonghyun does. If he makes a snowball then Taemin does the same. Taemin doesn’t play in the snow. He stays inside when it’s cold and he stays inside when it’s hot just so he can draw windows. His obsession with windows started as a child when he saw his father leave the house and never come back. Each day he’d sit in his room and wait for him to come back. He’ll draw everything he saw for his father so that when he did come, he’ll see what he missed all those days. That’s why those pages were numbered. That’s why Taemin never left his room, in fear that he’ll miss something or more importantly that he’ll miss his father coming back home.
Jonghyun freed him from that fear for a while. Taemin finally smiled and while with Jonghyun. When they played in the snow, making snowangels and a snowman. They named him Momo because his head looked like a peach and Jonghyun was learning Chinese. Taemin didn’t know why that was a reason but he agreed. Momo.
An hour or two later, he came back inside and looked out the window. He drew Momo.
Maybe 12 different months passed, maybe more passed when Taemin began playing more and drawing less.
Maybe more. Because the white patches were back and they still matched Jonghyun’s teeth. But Taemin realised that they were flowers. And these days Taemin drew the daisies more than he drew the windows. Jonghyun was nice to him. Taemin was 10 when he was 14. And sometimes Jonghyun helped out with Taemin’s school work. Sometimes Taemin helped Jonghyun out with his planting of flowers.
Even more days passed but Taemin lost track of how many windows he had drawn because he had stopped so long ago. His walls were covered with daisies now.
Taemin is now 18 and Jonghyun is in college. They talk less but the daisies are still overflowing the garden. White and yellow. Pure happiness. Everything Jonghyun ever gave him since the day they played in the snow.
Jonghyun came back from college today. It’s 5:30 and Taemin is getting ready for his Graduation Banquet. Jonghyun knocks on the front door, Taemin’s mother answers. A black tuxedo with a red daisy tucked into the fron pocket.
Taemin comes home with that red daisy in his pocket.
Maybe he’s in love. Maybe Jonghyun’s in love. Maybe both.
Maybe both. Because the way Jonghyun kissed Taemin in the car was more than just a peck on the cheek. It was filled with passion and years of hidden feelings. Jonghyun’s kiss made Taemin’s heart race. The dance they shared outside of the school was just the same.
Windows didn’t matter anymore, there were daisies growing in Taemin’s heart and they needed the windows to be gone.
