As much as Nicki knew it wasn’t her fault, she continued to go back to blaming herself for it all. Maybe if she paid a bit more attention to him, he wouldn’t have cheated. She didn’t understand why this was a constant occurrence in her life. Maybe there was something that was truly wrong with her. Maybe she didn’t deserve the love that she thought she did. She took a deep breath as she popped one of the Percocet pills in her mouth. Onika just wanted to forget it all.
One pill.. two.. the taste that ran down her throat may of been plain due to the face she made in disgust. Deep down, it felt like she was given the most sweetest death treat of all time. Before she could even pop the next pill she nervously peeked her head out the bathroom door to see if her mother and brother were in sight. Just her luck she watched as her younger brother strolled down the hallway — music blasting through his headphones as he made his way back into the guestroom. Nicki sighed in relief before quickly closing the bathroom door and sliding down on it. She thought about whether or not it was worth popping the whole entire bottle of the pills or just pop a few. Either way, she knew both decisions were terrible. Her intentions for sure wasn’t instant suicide. She just wanted to be stress-free for once in her life. She wanted to be able to get that feeling of ‘freedom’ once again and those pills were exactly the answer to her thoughts. “Just kill me now..” She whispered lowly to herself, clutching onto the bottle of pills that were in her hand. Her heart began to beat faster than usual as her eyes stayed glued to the bottle. Everything that has happened to her this past week she wanted to forget about in a hot second. From the time her own husband accused her of cheating which lead to him choking her over a stupid assumption, to the point where she found out about his dirty work and did something she never would’ve of thought doing a day in her life — she was sick of it all. Her whole life was crumbling down and Nicki was just now realizing it. She felt naive to believe her life was going to be ‘perfect’ because of all the positive vibes that were being sent away. Apparently, that all turned out to be just a phase.
Nicki took the next two and final pill — her whole entire body shutting down minutes later. As much she didn’t have to ease the pain in such a dangerous way, her naive self came back again which lead to her decision. She was tired of the fighting. She was tired of the bickering. She was tired of being hurt. She was just tired overall and happily believed this was the best way to remove all types of pain — negativity in her life.
