unrequited love | modern!sokka x reader
warnings: a few curse words, angst?(maybe)
summary: sokka doesn't love you, not like you love him.
word count: 1K
A/N: this is my first ever writing on here, so it might not be that good. it's also just a short drabble I wrote in the middle of the night. English is not my first language, so I apologize for any grammar/ spelling mistakes. feedback is appreciated.
You woke up with a feeling of dread in your stomach. You knew you had to do it. You had to break up with him. It was all becoming too much.
----
"Alright, I'm heading to bed, sweets. Do you need anything?"
"Nope. I'll be there in a few," you called out from the kitchen. You, as usual, had left a thesis paper till the last minute, so you were trying to finish it.
"Okay," Sokka replied, "goodnight." He came over to where you were seated and gave you a quick kiss on the forehead.
After you finished, you closed your laptop and headed to your shared room. Once you reached the foot of the bed, you flopped on the bed next to Sokka. He was already asleep, given how late it was; 2:34 am, your phone read. When you settled in bed next to him, he haphazardly reached out to you, making you giggle.
Not for long, though, as the smile on your face turned into a frown.
"I love you, Yue."
----
There it was, the same torture every time. At first, you thought nothing of it, she was his first love after all. The more it happened, the more the feeling of pure desolation wrecked your guts. You guys have been together for a year, and almost every night, he would say Yue's name in his sleep.
You never brought it up, sparing Sokka's feelings more than your own, knowing he'd feel guilty for putting you through this. And it seemed like he wasn't aware of it. His unconscious mind got the best of him.
It was no one's fault, really. It wasn't your fault you were so utterly in love with Sokka. Just how it wasn't his fault he didn't love you as much. Still, it was getting to you, and you weren't sure how much you could bottle up anymore.
----
It was dark out, you and Sokka were sprawled on the couch, watching some rerun of Star Wars. You've been stalling all day, but you knew it was inevitable now.
"Sokka," you called out his name, trying to get his notice.
He merely hummed, not taking his eyes off the television.
You chuckled softly, almost forgetting what you were going to do, before continuing, "We should break up."
That got his attention, his eyebrows furrowed, and he paused the TV. His whole attention is on you now. "We should... what?"
"We should break up."
A look of confusion was etched on his face now. He couldn't think of a reason why you would want to break up with him. He thought everything was going great. To him, it was. "Break up? Are you not happy anymore-"
"No! God, no," you quickly interrupted him, "you make me the happiest I've ever been. But I can't do that for you, that's why I think it's for the best if we-"
"What do you mean? You make me happy," Sokka countered, "of course you do! Where is this coming from?"
"Sokka, stop lying to yourself. I know it's not me you've been thinking of. I wanted to believe you thought about me, but it seems no matter what I do, you can't let go of her."
It was all making sense to him now. You sensed it. You could almost see the gears turning in his head. He was piecing it all together now.
"Sweets, you're the only one for me," he tried to reassure you, but the look in his eyes said otherwise.
"Please stop. You say her name in your sleep Sokka!" you ran a hand over your hair and let out a chuckle. "And- God, it's so fucked up I'm talking about this because she's dead! I knew what I was signing up for when we started dating. But fuck me if I knew how much it would hurt!"
"Y/n," Sokka called out, throat choked up, eyes brimmed red.
"No, let me finish, please," you stated firmly, "I'm not Yue, Sokka. You have to stop pretending that I am. I know you loved her. She was your first love, but please stop pretending that I'm her. I'm me. I know that’s not enough, but it’s all I got. If that isn't enough for you, you have to let me go."
"You are enough," Sokka asserted, his voice cracking, "more than enough. I'm... so sorry I made you feel anything less than."
"It's not your fault, hon. You don't get to choose who you love. Maybe in another lifetime, we would've worked. But not right now."
You both basked in the silence for a few minutes, though it felt much longer than that. You were trying your hardest not to cry. You've already cried too much about this.
"So this is it?" Sokka was the first to break the silence, his head in his hands, he rubbed at his eyes in frustration.
"I guess so," you answered, "I'll pack my bags and I'll be out of your hair by the end of the night."
You stood up, heading to the bedroom but Sokka held your arm softly. "I do love you, you know. What you said earlier about not getting to choose who we love. I truly love you if that makes a difference."
You took his face in your hands, intricately studying every detail. You brought him in for a kiss, one which he reciprocated just as fast, arms fastening around your waist, securing you in place. As if he was afraid of letting you go. This kiss was not like the other kisses you've shared, as cliché as that sounds. This kiss said goodbye, you both knew it.
The kiss lasted a few seconds, both of you slowly letting go, trying to prolong the process. Trying to memorize how it feels being in each other's embrace one last time.
Your eyes brimmed red, you slowly opened them, putting on the best smile you could without breaking down into pieces. Your foreheads touched, and you could feel Sokka's uneven breaths fanning your face.
"I know, honey, but you're not in love with me, not like I am with you."
