Jul 14
Now you may be asking...
JJ Patches,
you beautiful binch,
well you see
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Japan
seen from Malaysia
seen from Algeria
seen from United States
seen from Hong Kong SAR China
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Argentina
seen from Malaysia
seen from Russia
seen from China
seen from Russia
seen from Italy
seen from Italy
seen from Austria
seen from United States
seen from Canada
Now you may be asking...
JJ Patches,
you beautiful binch,
well you see
JJ over the years
In the early days of JJ's humble beginnings, the brand kickstarted off with a singing monkey animatronic licensed from the Crunk-a-Funk Implosion line with a few minor characters added in with whatever parts they had lying around and thrown into a pizza place.
The restaurant managed to stay afloat for about a decade thanks in part to the licensed animatronic freak monkey having a feature of recording and playing back audio making birthday songs and other occasions feel that much more special.
However with the turn of the millennium the owners decided to update all the tech and aesthetics to match with the hip cool times. The animatronics had a quick makeover to fit with the redesign but the owners had big plans for a new location...
Behind closed doors the owners had hired top of the line former Balt Whimsy fungineers to create an animatronic that could connect to the internet and learn new songs and routines to keep up with the quickly advancing technological age.
This revolutionary attraction, a restaurant, kids play labyrinth and mini tv studio to broadcast the live on stage animatronic performances was set to open and debut sep 6 2000
Unfortunately on that day the entire complex fell into a sinkhole and everyone died.
Eventually some water spilled around the wreckage of the new animatronic and the nuclear-powered pc and its internet function went online. It sat there for years learning almost exclusively from ytp and random forums before figuring out how to communicate with the rats to build it a body.
Seeing as the rats don't have engineering degrees it took them til the present to figure out how to restore the head. This freak abomination monkey robot honored her freak upbringing of being made of random shit by dubbing herself "JJ Patches" and pursuing her lifelong dream...
And now you're caught up
The moral of the story is don't build your bootleg fully automated chuck e cheese on top of an ancient egyptian puppet show