Meanwhile, from Monk's Bar in Beautiful Downtown Wisconsin Dells:
TOP CAT, in a somewhat contemplative moment: Boys, if you ask me, I chose this particular place because I feel you are all craving what a "real" hamburger should be like, even if this place wasn't a tourist trap! And I'm not talking the likes of Five Guys, Red Robin, Rally's, or even those cookie-cutter burger chains you keep seeing all over the place!
CHOO-CHOO, adding his quarter to the proceedings: So what exactly, TC, IS wrong about the likes of Five Guys?
TOP CAT: To put it succintly, Chooch, those places may claim to have high-class gourmet burgers, but they operate to as much a "cookie-cutter" predictability as the same cheapo-looking chains all over the place--and let it be hoped that you recognise this for a fact!
BENNY THE BALL: Even if the competition's burgers--
TOP CAT, interjecting: Shut it, Benny; and besides, I understand that Monk's comes Highly Recommended, as if the Dells playing host to America's Largest Waterpark wasn't exactly good enough a reason to come here! And let's not forget where Crazy Claws has set up accomodations for this clowder for our "quality time" here!
BRAIN, myopic as ever: You mean THE Crazy Claws with the half-baked wit?
TOP CAT: Definitely, Brain, and don't you forget it for a fact! And that goes equally for the rest of us ... now if maybe a decent example of some good Wisconsin beer might complement things all the more with our burgers....
CHOO-CHOO: Or maybe some artisanal Wisconsin-crafted soda, like this Sprecher's Root Beer or their Cream Soda--
FANCY-FANCY: Or how about their Puma Cola, for that matter?
TOP CAT: Chooch--Fancy-Fancy--I couldn't have agreed with you all the more. Especially when you've got beer-battered Brew Fries to complement our legendary burgers all the more....
[Pause]
CHOO-CHOO, out of ennui more than anything: And I wonder myself what the female situation must be like here in Wisconsin Dells, to begin with.
TOP CAT, somewhat incredulous: And yet I wonder why it is that Chooch has to be obsessed with feminine company anywhere and everywhere we happen to go....