Moon Pilot
1962 theatrical release poster
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Moon Pilot
1962 theatrical release poster
Moon Pilot, 1962
Vintage Disney Cinema
Review #59: Moon Pilot
Post #64
9/18/2020
Next up is 1962′s Moon Pilot
Enjoyment : [4]
This movie isn’t very good. The act of watching it is slow and uninteresting. There isn’t any build up or pay off, and the conflict is never more than just a slight inconvenience to the characters. There is also a big issue where it never seems to follow through on any plot thread. When it ends you feel like nothing was resolved, and nothing was set up that even needed resolving. It’s also very confused about what genre it wants to be. Is it a wacky family comedy? Is it a steamy romance? It is a tense spy thriller? The answer to all of this is no but also yes. While I enjoy some moments, they can’t really be enjoyed as a whole since they never mesh together.
Quality : [3]
This is a very poorly written movie. It is also very cheap since there are very few sets, and the special effects amount to one green screen shot and one cross dissolve to show “alien powers.” It has the aesthetic of a cheap made for TV movie and the barely a penny spent on anything of value. The writing is also pretty garbage. They set up the threat of space madness, since the monkey goes to space and comes back violent, and the alien girl has a cure to the space madness... but we never see the monkey again and I am pretty sure we never see the human pilot drink the cure to the space madness either. Was that intentional? Is the ending implying that he is just crazy and dies in space? The movie never says either way. You can almost sense the lack of an artistic direction with this movie. They tried too hard to be everything and ended up being nothing.
Hold up : [3]
This movie has a thick layer of ‘red scare’ to it, which fits the time period, but also means you have to watch a bunch of paranoid nationalists argue about how can hump the flag harder for an hour and a half. This movie also takes delight in sexualizing and mocking women. The protagonist is at least a passable level or respectful, but everyone else around him leers at women and the camera work makes them the but of many jokes. This movie is also super horny. It literally ends with the protagonist flying off to an alien planet so he can have never ending sex with alien babes. Normally I found find that very funny, but this movie tries to be a family friendly movie, so its more just wink wink nudge nudge the whole time. It doesn’t succeed at being family friendly and it doesn’t succeed at being raunchy either. I will note that they ALMOST pulled off the ‘born sexy yesterday’ trope, since Lyrae shows that her sweet innocent nature as more of a flirting technique than just genuine naïveté. She seems fully aware of consent and sex which is a lot more than most “born sexy yesterday” characters.
Risk : [3]
This movie is really limp. It has nothing important to say, and it does almost nothing to refute the creepy American Exceptionalism soaked into its bones. I can understand a little bit, since it was actually written DURING the red scare and space race... but that still doesn’t mean it isn’t hateful. It also uses this story of mankind first contact with aliens to... make sure on dude gets laid? I feel like you could have done more with a first contact story. I can’t really think of any other descriptor than ‘limp’ to describe this movies impact. It just flops on the floor and never goes anywhere.
Extra Credit : [1]
Some jokes land, and some scenes are charming. I appreciated that the protagonist wasn’t a sexist asshat, but that might have been more due to him being passive and bland. He had SOME himbo energy but not nearly enough to be fun.
Final thoughts:
Who was this movie for? Adults will be annoyed by the childish tone, and children will be annoyed by the lengthy political discussions. It is truly baffling to say that this movie has zero spectacle to it. I mean for god sakes there is a psychic shapeshifting alien lady in this movie and there is no fun make up, no alien costumes, no magic powers and no special effects beyond off screen teleportation and a single cross fade where she shows a ghost boy to the protagonist. This is the same studio that made 20,000 Leagues they couldn’t come up with ANYTHING cool for the alien lady to do? Have her use telekinesis or create illusions or shape-shift? I guess there is also almost no plot since it all boils down to the protagonist just being a little uncomfortable and his boss being a little demanding. Also because the alien lady can just like, teleport at will and do whatever she wants there is no conflict in her getting caught or failing to get the cure to the protagonist. Which I would like to repeat, we never see him drink the cure, the thing the entire plot revolves around. I guess we have to assume he drank it off screen or the entire movie ends up not making any sense. Give this one a skip you’ll just end up bored and confused by the end.
Total Score: 14/50
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Walt Disney’s MOON PILOT, the Easter ‘62 attraction at Radio City Music Hall.
Independent Exhibitors Film Bulletin, 1962.
Moon Pilot, 1962
Original release one-sheet movie poster from Walt Disney’s Moon Pilot (1961).