Can you please write an angsty (with a happy ending) AJ fic
hiiii nonny 🥰 hopefully you not too mad with me lol this isn't the happiest ending but it's.........cordial at least lol 😅
who knows what the future holds 👀
hope you enjoy! xx
lost one: anthony joshua x black!fem reader
summary: what happens when you love someone but loving them just isn't enough?
warnings: none? its a little angsty though. not the happiest ending but its a reconciliation.
a/n: be gentle with me lol this is my first long fic + first angsty fic. maybe angst adjacent 🧐
The invite had been sitting on your coffee table for a week. Crrip white envelope with your name across the front in beautiful script. You passed it by everyday for a week leading up to tonight. You wanted to stay at home and crawl into bed, wanting to forget about that chapter of your life. You loved what the gala stood for just hated having to work the room.
That was usually Anthony’s strong suit.
You look at yourself in the floor length mirror tucked in the corner of your room taking in your full appearance. Hair pulled up into a messy updo, a few curly tendrils framing your face softly. Brown skin glowing under the low lights of your room due to the shimmering body oil you used after your shower. A simple black floor length gown is what you opted to wear this evening; sweetheart neckline with a corset like waistline that pulls you in just enough before giving way to your hips. The fabric follows your soft curves before falling into a dangerously high slit, the fabric parting with each step you take.
Your doorbell ringing interrupts your thoughts, right on time. You gather a few more things, throwing them into your clutch, and make your way down. As you open the door, he pauses, taking you in. “You look beautiful tonight,” he says, backing up, giving you space to pass. Your face warms, “Thanks.” You say softly as his hand settles at the small of your back on the short walk back to his car.
Once you are both settled in, he looks over at you, “Ready?”
“As ready as I’m gonna be.” You say with a small chuckle.
The ride to the gala was smooth; easy conversation flowed between the two of you. Making you realize how much you missed the small intimate moments shared between two people. Him just asking about your week and actually listening lands deep for you. It shouldn’t, but it does.
The car slows to a stop in front of the venue for tonight; he’s out speaking to the valet before your door opens good enough. He rounds the car to meet you, again letting his hand settle at the small of your back as you both move towards the controlled chaos of the event. Once inside, the low hum of music and conversations add to the feeling of it all. It’s familiar to say the least.
“We can leave whenever you want, you know.” He says easily, glancing over at you.
“I know,” you start, grinning softly. “I promise, I’m ok.”
Together, you move further into the room, stopping briefly to take two glasses of champagne from a passing server. He hands you one without asking. Finding a quiet corner to settle into away from the hustle and bustle of people, continuing the conversation from the ride over.
He puts the champagne flute down in the middle of the table after finishing it. “I’m going to get something stronger from the bar.”
You laugh, “Already? The night just started.”
He gives a quick shrug, “Want something?”
“Another glass of champagne, please. Thank you.” You say, a small smile gracing your lips.
“Of course.” He says, walking toward the bar.
A few moments after your date left, you pulled out your phone. Sent a few text messages, checked some emails, then tucked it back into your clutch. Your eyes scanned the room out of habit, and that’s when you saw him. In all of his 6’6 glory, tuxedo tailored to perfection, head thrown back in one of his signature laughs. Your ex.
Anthony.
But that isn’t what made you pause. It's who he was talking to that made you do a double-take.
“Just my fuckin’ luck.” You mutter.
You figure it’s best to go ahead and rip the band aid off, instead of dodging him the entire night. You take a deep breath, holding your head high as you start toward both men. As you got closer you caught the tail end of the conversation between the two men, your date praising Anthony about his last fight with Jake Paul.
“I didn't know that I was with a fan.” You say voice teasing as you step into the open space between both men.
“You didn’t ask.” A sheepish laugh escapes your date.
“I guess it didn't come up either.” You hum softly, taking the glass of champagne off the bar.
Bringing the glass to your lips, you take a quick sip of the pale colored liquid. You glance over at Anthony, giving him a subtle head nod. “Anthony.” you say curtly. His eyes meet yours, offering that same nod back to you while saying your name.
There’s a shift between the three of you, but before it becomes any more awkward than it already is, your date breaks the silence with a small laugh. "Wait—” Your date’s eyebrows pinch together. “...this is the Anthony you were talking about?”
“Yeah, that’s him.” You say, taking another sip of the champagne wishing that this moment would end already. You feel Anthony’s eyes on you, and you refuse to look in his direction. You knew you downplayed him and the history between the two of you. He nods, as if that answers enough before clearing his throat, “If you’ll excuse me. Enjoy your night.”
A moment passes between you and him. His eyes look past you in the direction that Anthony disappeared, then back at you.
He exhales softly, thumb brushing against his jaw. “I’d be doing us a disservice. You know that right?” He asks softly.
Your brows knit together. “It’s not—"
“Maybe it’s not,” He cuts in gently. “Maybe I’m reading too much into this. But something is there.” A moment passes between the two of you as he continues. “I’d rather step back now than pretend that I don’t see it...even if you don’t want to.” His voice softer.
“Take a moment, I’ll be around. And when you’re ready to go, just let me know.” A small, polite smile forms on his face before he steps away blending back into the crowd.
You find yourself in the nearest ladies’ room; once the door shuts behind you, you take a moment to center your thoughts; they've been running rampant since you came here. Closing your eyes, you take a few deep breaths just to regroup. You look at your reflection in the mirror—despite how beautiful you look this evening, your eyes tell on you. The sadness and whirlwind of unsaid feelings settle in your brown orbs.
Partially because you knew that you still missed AJ and seeing him tonight was like picking a wound that had finally scarred over, letting the fresh blood spill out.
You thought you made the right decision. You were suffocating in the relationship. Losing yourself in the name of being by his side and supporting him. Constantly coming in second place to his career. Despite it all, it didn’t mean that you ever stopped loving him. Those feelings just didn’t go away.
“I can’t stay hiding out in here forever.” You say, a quick tuft of laughter slipping out.
Digging through your clutch to refresh your make up, fixed a few loose strands of hair and took one final deep breath.
I made it this far tonight, what's a few more hours?
As you step out of the ladies' room, you hear applause and cheers. Your eyes move to the stage just as he walks up. Once he thanks the presenter, he settles into speaking like he’s done this hundreds of times. His speech holds a lot of irony in it; giving back, showing up for those who need it, and having opportunities to better oneself. As you listen, it takes you back to a time when you remember standing right next to him. However, tonight you’re just watching. As he wraps up, the crowd cheers and applauds him again. This would be the perfect chance for you to slip out unnoticed.
But something keeps you there, rooted in that one spot. The moment he's off the stage, he’s pulled in different directions for quick conversations, people congratulating him or photo-ops. Only reinforcing the part of his life that you couldn't compete with. The energy shifts, you feel it. You look up and his eyes are on you, already moving towards you.
“Can I talk to you for a moment?” He asks once he’s in front of you.
You take a second before nodding. Taking your hand in his, he leads you to a quieter patio area outside.
“You look nice.” He says, unsure of how he should start this conversation despite wanting to have it.
“Thank you, you also. You always did clean up well.” You say softly.
A few moments of silence pass between the two of you before he starts again. “With a note—”
“After everything I’ve said out loud already,” You take a deep breath. “That note wasn’t me explaining why I did what I did, but more so of me picking me. Being done.” You pause as you look at the skyline. Focusing on the buildings in the distance. “It finally clicked what my future could look like. What our future could look like. So, while you were doing press downstairs, I wrote that note and left it in that hotel room.” You say, turning your attention back to Anthony. “I didn’t leave because I didn’t love you, I left because I loved you at the expense of me.”
For the first time, you see it settle within him. “I didn’t realize that it was costing you that much.”
Silence settles between the two of you once more. “I can’t do that again, I won’t do that again.” You say, voice even.
He nods once, “And I’m not expecting you to,’ He exhales, “My life isn’t slowing down, I can be honest about that.”
“Well, how can we expect—” You start.
“Give me a chance to show you that I’ve learned from it.” He interrupts. “I know what I lost; I’m not taking this opportunity, if you give it to me, lightly.”
You mull over his words. Could you really see yourself back in a relationship with him?
“I’m gonna need time to think.” You whisper.
“Understood.”
You take one last glance at him before turning on your heels to head back inside.
Your date, it doesn’t even feel right calling him that anymore, spots you before you see him. Excusing himself from the conversation he was in, he catches up with you.
“You good?”
A dry laugh leaves your lips. “Right now? I can’t even give you a honest answer.”
“Fair. Things looked pretty intense out there.” He says.
You open your mouth, ready to explain, when he raises his hand to stop you. “I don’t need you to explain to me what it was. My concern for the night is to make sure that you’re ok.”
You give him a faint smile.
“I think I’m gonna head out, stay. Enjoy yourself. I’ll call an Uber or something.”
His eyebrows furrow together, ready to protest.
“I’m fine, I will be fine.” You promise him.
“Text me when you make it home.” He says, leaving no room for pushback.
“Of course, thank you for everything tonight. Seriously.”
He nods once, getting the feeling that you’re not just talking about him physically being there. “Of course.”
You head for the exit, in no rush to call anyone or a ride share. The air feels different this time when you step out. It’s quieter. And for the first time tonight, it was easier to breathe.
a/n pt 2: forgive any mistakes lol my eyes are going cross as I edit this