#mooselocked

[fanlocked-writergirl-blog]

Sorry guys, I was home for the holidays for a longer visit and totally did not do the writing I had meant to...but What He Lost has not been abandoned! It just might take a few days to get back on track

[mumblemoose]

I am so so angry today.

My parents went to visit my other brother this weekend to celebrate one of my nephews' birthday (which isn't for a few more weeks). They didn't even tell us that was the intention of the visit until the morning of (they told my brother, not me, I was asleep). Neither of us was ever asked if we wanted to go and I had a prior engagement that my brother was driving me to so neither of us could have this week. It was kind of shitty, but whatever, we'll see them soonish anyway because Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Except today (immediately after we had both seen our therapist) my mother informs my brother that my shitty other brother doesn't want him to see the kids anymore (because he's trans). And that's terrible and I'm pissed at my (other) brother, of course. Both because it's a shitty thing to decide and because the chicken shit didn't even have the decency to tell my brother himself.

But I am also really mad at my mother. Because this is the woman who got mad at my brother for wearing a "Just a boy who loves dinosaurs" shirt the first time they came to visit (a shirt he had worn plenty of times before that and loves) because it might upset other brother. But whose reaction to him decreeing that my brother isn't allowed to see our nephews was apparently along the lines of "that's too bad. So when should the rest of us come for Christmas?" and her exact words when telling my brother of this turn of events was "it sucks, but that's how it is".

Part of me feels like it's unfair to be mad at her for accepting this and not showing any kind of solidarity with my brother. Another part of me feels like it's unfair to want her to refuse to see him (and her grandkids) just because he's being a dick. I don't know what's fair and I don't know how to handle this feeling at all. And I hate it.

And I just know that she's going to come back from Christmas and want to tell us all about what the kids got and did and whatnot. And I'm just going to get angry all over again. What the hell am I supposed to do here?

[mumblemoose]

I took a shower and opened a new bottle of body wash that I thought was the same as the old body wash but they added fragrance without warning (Fragrance is litterally one of the ingredients, what fragrance? who knows), and now I smell bad. Why do shampoos and soaps have to be like this? Do you have any idea how hard I have to work to find products that don't smell? This is the worst.

[mumblemoose]

Today I had a conversation with my husband of 10 years in which I basically wanted him to give me any reason not to leave and “I love you and don’t want you to go” probably would have been enough and he just... did not do that... at all. So I told him I wanted a divorce and my brother and I will be moving out when the lease is up.

[mumblemoose]

Forgot to post this when I got it, so I’ll post it now while it’s still relevant.

If you haven’t gotten one of these neat stickers go now! They’re free with proof of participation!

VOTE!

[mumblemoose]

My birthday is coming up and my mother wants to know what I would like. I know what I want from her for my birthday, but it feels weird asking for it.

See, when I was a kid she used to sing this song to me. It was beautiful and I loved it. But as I grew older she stopped singing it, and I never even knew what it was called. And then in high school I heard the original and it was... not as good. And my sister has a rock version... also not as good. So what I want is a recording of my mom singing this song.

It’s a very sentimental sort of gift, and not at all the sort of thing I usually ask for. And thinking about asking for it feels weird. And I’m worried that it’ll upset her somehow. So I’m hesitating.

Any advice?

[fanlocked-writergirl-blog]

Getting a lot of questions about alt!Derek and his Stiles...don’t worry guys, I have plans not to leave you hanging there ;)

[fanlocked-writergirl-blog]

New Chapter!

New chapter up for What He Lost!!! I know, it’s been forever! I hit a little writers block and my life went crazy, but I hope you guys like it! The sexy times finally get started, so something worth waiting for, hopefully ; )

http://archiveofourown.org/works/7920436/chapters/18098767