#more normal

[slaygentford]

the fact that I haven't even BEGUN to put together my year in review playlist yet. unreal

[17sasuke]

the foxhole court 🤝 mo dao zu shi/tian guan ci fu                 would be perfect stories if they                                                 weren’t written by fujos

[fruitsnommy]

my moms home so im in my room now and i did a bit of housework so im Less insane

[fivebyfive55]

Buffy Rewatch

Giles: “Just because the paranormal is more normal and less...para as of late, is no excuse for tardiness or letting your guard down.”

205 Reptile Boy

[duckyskade]

kbearluna is basically my favorite superhero.

[niallund]

there is this guy I really like and I don't even remember what color his eyes are. maybe i have more of a natural obsession with him.

[wendell-or-something]

Okay, I fell asleep in the middle of the day and had a batshit insane dream that really messed me up, and basically I shouldn't have done that... but also here's what it was about.  'Cuz it's too nuts not to mention, and I won't remember it later if I don't write it down.

Anyway, a lot of the dream was just us trying to maintain the salt barrier around the house, and there were other people who would pass through sometimes on their way to other places, or stay with us for a while, but they were all terrified and relieved to have found a safe place, small as it was.  Apparently we were traveling too, somehow, but I didn't know why, and I had no recollection of where we'd been or how we got where we were.

Then there was the day that my parents were adamant that we were leaving, but there were titans all over the place and something told me that we shouldn't go out.  I was afflicted with even more dread than the idea of facing titans would usually cause, and they were suggesting that we travel on foot to our van as a mode of transportation.  This struck me as a terrible idea, logically speaking, but they wouldn't listen to reason, and at the same time, they were acting as though I was the one who wouldn't listen to reason.  I was begging them not to leave the salt barrier, and they were pleading with me to come along with them.

Then things got really weird.  The dream switched to a scene where a Buddhist monk had caught a dirty, emaciated boy scrounging around in these catacombs that looked a bit like a temple.  I'm not sure where any of this was located.  The stones were all weathered, and there was an alter where the boy was crouching like an animal, and in front of that was a paved canal, but the water was stagnant except for what was leaking steadily from the walls through the cracks in the masonry.  There was incense burning, and everything was dimly lit by candles... and then the boy revealed that he was one of many kids who were skulking around down there.

I forget what the monk said exactly, but he basically revealed that I was reading his journal, and that's what all the kids represented... people who had read his journal.  By reading the journal, we changed our life stories.  That's why the titans existed for me in my dream, and why I basically knew that it didn't make sense for us to be in that house, or for titans to exist, or any of that.

After having that revelation, I went to my parents and tried to explain to them that none of this was real, but I also wasn't sure how to break out of it, or get back to the life I'd known, which I could only vaguely recall at this point.  I just knew that the life I'd had was better, so I wanted to get it back.  They were still trying to convince me to leave, and preparing to leave, and it was utterly horrifying somehow... right up until I was back in my old life.  Sort of.

I was suddenly coming in the back door at my house, and I realized that things were alright, and that I was home, but when I went to go see what my parents were doing, I was shocked to find that my dad had no fingers on one hand, and the fingers on the other weren't all the way there, as though they'd been amputated a long time ago.  He was still gesturing as he talked, the way he always does, and he and my mom were acting as though nothing was out of the ordinary, even though this definitely should've been.

I had no clue how this had happened, or what he was doing for a living, because clearly graphic designing requires fingers, right?  It all just felt so wrong.  Everything was off kilter.  Basically I was still altering the timeline of my life, and the lives of those around me, and I had no idea how.  This was about when the dream petered out and I woke up, still totally confused from trying to figure out how to begin to get back to the reality I knew... but I guess I did in the end, ironically enough.  Needless to say, I'm really uneasy right now.