#mosurecovery

[vermosu]

Oh my goodness.

[vermosu]

Wish you were here.

Or I was there.

Or we were together anywhere.

I miss you so much, o!

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It's only been 2 days since I started smiling again and I found the old me, suddenly the trauma came back and my chest felt like it had been hit by a big wave and I tried to hold it in as hard as I could.

Hi trauma, can you just come slowly?

Can you just be normal?

I'm tired of feeling like I'm being stabbed in the back, I want to sleep without a cold sweat, I want to wake up refreshed without a depressed look on my face.

[vermosu]

🤍 Ibu Samchon who never left me alone in my difficult time now

[vermosu]

내 눈물이 그쳤으면 좋겠어

내가 울지 않게 도와줘. 제발.

물론 이것은 모두에게 좋은 소식이지만 내 마음에는 과정이 필요합니다. 어머니와 삼촌의 결혼식 때 혼자 많이 외로웠을 때처럼 만감이 교차하고 너무 아팠다

내가 많이 조용하고 미래에 덜 열정적 인 것처럼 보인다면 죄송합니다. 다시 정리할 공간과 시간이 필요합니다

[vermosu]

If anyone asks what I'm doing now..........

I'm still learning with enthusiasm both on/offline, practicing ice hockey twice a week, busy playing with friends, wrestling with my cats, cooking for dinner, also go to therapy to relieve my depression. I'm doing great.

Let's quick updates

I'm getting taller. If last year I was the shortest kid in the class now I'm almost on par with them.

I dyed my hair darker rofl. No special reason I just want to look fresh. I did it on my birthday, on my bedroom with Jihye imo. Not only my friends, Ibu and Samchon were screaming hysterically and said it suited me perfectly 🧒🏻

I've dared to take the train out of town by myself. Of course Ibu dropped me off to get checked in and Samchon/Samchon Appa picked me up at Busan station. It was an interesting experience for me because I met new people sitting next to my chair, they were all very kind.

At my new age I learned to be more sincere to let go of things that I can't control. My psychiatrist said that instead of being sad alone, I better focus on what I can do now, just be present. Not yet Because they don't necessarily want to know what's going on yourself.

I have a new cousin his name is Wasa! Congratulations to Paman Bagus and Nari Imo. I have a Taurus bff now! I'm glad that Niyang and Kakiyang will be staying here while Nari Imo is on maternity leave 🕺🏻

Apart from Eid which coincides with my birthday, this month we are very happy because we are going on vacation. Ibu with 93-94 line, Samchon with 88-89 line also with his dance crew. Me? Staycation at Busan with Mapo gang 🤪 This is my second time going on vacation without parents, the first one was last winter with my ice hockey team.

This month was my very first interview for a small job. I was so excited then makes me couldn't sleep for 2 nights and on the D day my body dropped and went to the clinic in the morning. just eat, sleep, take medicine and repeat hoping that in the afternoon I'm feeling better but it's said no hahahaha. However the interview went goodl, what I learned in the morning was predictable. Ya you know, I'm a fast learner - it doesn't take me long to proceed what I'm learning even though i'm not feeling well - but it takes me 2 days to prepared my mental. Sick.

I managed to play the saxophone after learning auto for 2-3 months. The saxophone belongs to Samchon Appa, still in good condition but rarely played. Mom always gave up on playing wind instruments but I did it this time! Achievements unlocked!

We as a family are not fans of romantic dramas until the scene of Park Jungil and Koo Ryeon in Tomorrow made us scream loudly. Not infrequently we parody it irl. AAAAAAAAAAA its so strange, isn't it? How could we change just because of those ancient romance scenes 😬 But that still doesn't apply to other dramas. We just love Park Jungil's Koo Ryeon couple!

Unlike Ibu it turns out that I like Eid cakes, especially kue putri salju. We made it once it tasted worst even scorched and looked like a lunar eclipse 🌚

I used to close myself when my depression symptoms started to show but now I dare to open up and my friends always support me and accompany me anytime. THANKS A LOT Samchon for changing me better. Thanks Ibu for introducing me to Samchon. Thanks Mr. Woo for not give up when I often ask for a break or not even notify at all. Jihyuk hyeong, Donggu hyeong, Sejeong, Inha Noona - Mapo gang, thanks for being here 🖤 I may feel tired but those around me are definitely more exhausted, I really appreciate you guys. You all are more than enough for me.

끝 for now.

.

And how are you pals?

🙂

Untuk yang sedang berbahagia selamat ya you deserved that.

Untuk yang sedang sedih nangis aja di kamar just release your emotion, write journal, drink more and sleep. You're not alone, I'm by your side.

[vermosu]

Kickin' your back pain with.........

[vermosu]

In case you forgot, you deserve to be happy too

Mosu