Rewrite the Stars
Spock was the son of a renowned Vulcan diplomat. He had graduated Starfleet Academy with honors and was now a decorated officer serving aboard one of the fleet’s flagships as both the head of its Science division and its second-in-command. Despite the lingering mistrust sometimes expressed by his fellow crew members, he was well-respected on the Enterprise…even liked.
Spock was also beginning to panic. His well-ordered mind was in turmoil.
He’d gone to Sickbay in search of Dr. McCoy but had found only the head nurse, Miss Chapel. Though she was a smart and lovely young woman to be sure, Spock hadn’t had time for small talk even if he’d had an aptitude for such things. Not when an unstable crewman, infected by whatever had killed six members of the science team they’d planned to pick up on Psi 2000, had cut off all their power. Now the ship was hurtling into the rapidly-disintegrating planet’s atmosphere. In half an hour, all four hundred of them would be dead unless the senior officers could regain control.
Nurse Chapel had by that time been exposed to the contagion as well. Scientist that he was, Spock should have considered the possibility before he ever left the Bridge. Instead, he was alone in Sickbay with a very different woman from the one he thought he knew. I’m in love with you, Mr. Spock, she’d said as she cradled his hands between her soft ones. He couldn’t question the sincerity of her words. Not only had he actually felt the affection radiating off of her, he’d seen it in her earnest blue eyes, too. A man could drown in those eyes, he thought. I love you just as you are. She lacked both any of the misgivings or residual prejudice towards Vulcans he frequently encountered among humans…and also all of her usual inhibitions. He knew that she would never have spoken these feelings aloud of her own accord. As someone who’d spent his entire life learning to control the powerful emotions some people thought Vulcans simply didn’t have, Spock ached for her.
But what had he said? I’m sorry. That was all. I’m sorry. Then he had run away from the lovelorn nurse as whatever biochemical agent that had compelled her to profess her love for him began to tear down his own mental walls. He’d run because he was afraid—of himself.
Now here he was, trembling and fighting back tears in a rec room. Part of his mind remained keenly aware of their dire reality. All he could think of, though, was of Nurse Chapel and of his mother. His soft-spoken, pretty human mother with her sweet smile and easy laugh… I’ll always love you, no matter where you go or what you do, Spock—I’ll always be proud of you. Hot tears welled up in Spock’s eyes. Had he ever told her that he loved her, too? That without her, he would not have survived his often-difficult childhood or had the courage to stand up to his father…?
And all he’d been able to choke out in reply to Nurse Chapel was I’m sorry!
He covered his face with his hands and sucked in a long, shuddering breath.
@multirptrash ♥