#namjoon posts

[justsomesystembullshit]

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Hello everyone! We're a sideblog for @kingelend2022 for the BTS factives! We go by Bangtan collectively, but the host made a false name of The Purple System, so we'll use that too! Our names, pronouns, and tags are:

Kim Namjoon(RM), he/him, #namjoon posts Kim Seokjin(Jin), she/he/they (no pref), #jin posts Min Yoongi(SUGA), he/him, #suga posts

Jung Hoseok(j-hope), he/him, #j-hope posts Park Jimin(Jimin), he/they, #jimin posts Kim Taehyung(V), he/him, #v posts Jeon Jeongguk(Jung Kook/JK), he/him, #jk posts

[pffbts]

[12:46 AM] from namjoon

―what are you if not that ancient mysterious artifact preserved in the museums or the river that has been there since the beginning of the time? what are you if not the air that cuts through my flannels and brushes past me while i cycle up to my favorite ice-cream place? what are you if not the home that i can’t translate into any tongue or the roots of a century old tree that digs into the earth of mine? what are you if not something intangible, something that’s abstract and something that can only cling to my bones and sees every little secret of mine through the hollowness of my ribs? say, what am i to you - if not a house you built with your hands and for the first time, didn`t want to burn down?

delivered.

[pffbts]

[01:09 AM] from namjoon

―that day, i wish you were just someone passing by. i wish you didn`t have to look through the window into this room of mine and watch me walk on broken glasses. i wish you were someone whose name i wouldn`t have known all my life engraved into the part of my head that has locked itself up without telling me the whereabouts of its key. i wish you hadn`t taken all my heartstrings and made yourself that sweater to warm your cold evenings. i wish you hadn`t asked for my whereabouts. i wish you didn`t take my palm in yours. i wish you didn`t know my name. i wish you never knew me because i had nothing to give you then and nothing more right now.

delivered.

[pffbts]

[10:20 PM] from namjoon

―dear my dearest, i know we are made of each other. at the beginning of the time, when the wheel of time spun for the first time, our bones were made out of the same stardust and when we said goodbyes to each other, our ashes met again. but this time, let not the time win. through the storm, we will escape to the island we built with our own hands, somewhere so far and so distant let no one find us, not even fate. we can finally lay the bodies of our two souls together upon the ground where everything started so we stay together for once and for all.

delivered.

[pffbts]

[02:52 AM] from namjoon

―the brooding sky looms next to the window where i sit. out of habit, i reach out for your hand under the table. the ridges of your palm filling the gaps of my own. the warmth getting mixed up with my coldness. i get hungry for more. the dinner in front of us was long forgotten but what remained on a certain plate was the urge to tangle my fingers with yours and fill the gaps, more and more and more, until nothing in me stays hollow.

delivered.

[pffbts]

[01:14 PM] from namjoon

―you can let go because you`re my strong person. you`re enough because you love me. you`re not afraid because you work hard for this. you deserve happiness because you always cared. you can do this because you`re my person.

delivered.

[pffbts]

OH GOD I SENT A REACTION REQUEST FOR THE UhHH NIGHTMARES BUT I JUST SEEN UR RULes aND REBLOG SO LET ME REPHRASE THIS REQUEST; can i get a JOON imagine where u have a nightmare ?? lots of fluff w small bits of angst pls he's my angel

GENRE. fluff; angst (you probably need a microscope)

CHARACTER.  kim namjoon x reader | no supporting character

W.C. 1.2K

AUTHOR`S NOTE.  namjoon is my noodle. this is kinda short but thanks for requesting & happy reading, bub!

[02:28 AM] [what remains at night is the sound of them breathing.]

―namjoon`s hands trembled as he ungrasps the steering wheel. first day of completely driving on his own felt not only exciting but also frightening. every minute he was on full concentration and this, really made him tired as hell as he finally parks his car in the garage under his apartment.

turning off the ignition, he stuffs his car keys in his pocket after getting out of the car. though his body felt like it would just fall down any second, he thanked the architect of this building who gave the intricate thought of giving a proper functional lift.

his floor was 8th and he stands there, slumped against the silver-coloured metallic wall. his senses were somewhat outdated right then so he didn`t exactly feel the lift moving up against the gravity and finally stopping on his floor.

“oh, finally, i can finally just lie down,” he says to himself while inserting his keys to the entrance door. it was at that moment he realizes that you`re probably sleeping right now in your shared bedroom.

he opens the door with the remaining effort in him so as to not make any sort of sound and alert you. he proceeds to close it the same way, hangs his overcoat on the hook, opens his shoelaces and puts them back into the shoe rack. it looked like you had not gone out today because there wasn`t any trace of dust at the entrance.

because the only thing that was lit in the whole apartment was the hanging light above the dining table, namjoon opens his watches, unbuckles his belt and takes out the car keys from his pocket and place them on the clothed cover of the table. it took him a lot of concentration and consciousness to not make a single bit of a sound.

after all, he had known this all along that you`ve a very weak sleep situation. you get awakened by even a tad bit of creaking. namjoon proceeds to tiptoe towards the bedroom. if he had the chance he could`ve changed in another room but he didn`t want to, first of all, go through another turmoil of opening and closing a door and second of all, the closet was in the bedroom. either way, he has to enter in that. it was times like this when he remembers his promise to you that he`s going to buy a much spacer apartment in the future. you`ve as always chimed in adding that you will work hard too to financially help him.

namjoon finally dressed himself up in his sweatpants. he usually throws in a t-shirt over it but tonight felt too warm for that. also, he had this sudden urge to hold himself against your sleeping figure. he could make out under the dim moonlight from the open window that you`ve almost curled yourself up into a ball.

he slowly with batted breathe settles on the bed, right beside you. taking the thin blanket which has been covering your lower body till now, he takes his share of the same and finally lies down next to you.

minutes pass by and as he feels sleep entering into his system, he senses a twisting beside him. he moves his arm that was resting over his face to look at your direction. he couldn`t particularly make out the exact expression but he felt a certain uneasiness in you. he turns over on his side, facing your body and touches the side of your neck only to feel a thin sheet of perspiration gathered up there. along with that, he witnesses your breathing getting louder and this time you were not just breathing through your nose but through your mouth.

without hesitating any longer, namjoon flips you over so that you are lying on your back and not your side like before and opens the top three buttons of your nightshirt and moves your shirt`s collars apart and exposes your neck and half of your chest to the open air of the room.

“breath, ______, please breathe,” he mumbles to you and himself at the same time. your current state makes him realize that you`re probably seeing some nightmare. he rubs off the sweat that was accumulating on your face, sticking your hairs to the side of your face, he blows air through his mouth over your eyes to make you feel a little relaxed. though after a few moments it felt like you were feeling a bit better than before.

namjoon, thinking that he might just try feeding you some water starts getting off the bed when he feels something holding his wrist down to the bed. his reflex works faster than him and he returns back to hovering his face over your now awakened face.

you tried blinking multiple times to get used to the darkness and namjoon`s breath against your face.

“are you okay?” he whispers.

your mouth was feeling too dry and void at the same time so you kept it shut and just nodded back at him.

“were you having a bad dream?” joon`s voice felt too soft, it was like silk and roughness combined.

you nodded back at him but this time your hand reached up and they held his face in their palm softly. namjoon leaned into your palm taking in their texture and before he decides to say something, he leaned in and pressed his lips against yours, giving a soft kiss to soothe you down.

“feeling better?” he asks, his eyes too close to your own. you broke the eye contact and nodded back at him.

“let`s go back to sleep then,” but he completely forgot for a moment that he was initially getting up to get some water for you to drink and thus, he gets up and brings in a glassful of water for you from the kitchen, “here, drink this before sleeping.”

he helps you getting up and he even uses a wet cloth to clean the sweat that was giving you discomfort. though you whined indicating that it`s okay but he still did that.

“it`s okay. it`s not rocket science.”

after all these, he climbs back to the bed beside you and this time he doesn`t just lie down on his back. he turns to your side and holds you close enough so that your face remains against his chest and you breathe in the familiar warmth before going back to sleep.

it`s good to say that night after that a bad dream, you slept like a baby while namjoon protected you in his embrace.

fin.

[pffbts]

[00:00 AM | 1994.09.12 | an unsent letter]

―DEAR JOON, today i`m writing this letter in the name of your existence. i hope i sound sane enough to call you a very important person in my life, a someone whom i can call the love of my life, no less than that.

suddenly, as you`re looking around the architectures of the current city you`re in as a tourist, you realize that twenty-five years of your life has dawned upon you. you`ve come to realize that as you were namjooning your way through the glass dividers of junk foods, you suddenly miss your mother`s homemade foods which come with the sudden abrupt homesickness. you miss your dog, your room`s ceiling, your childhood days when days were simpler and people let you be as you were while you scribbled through your mind at the back of your school notebook. you remembered how solitude was in a much better state during those days than today.

but the end of your mouth twists as you come to understand that you`ve people now who love you for a reason and not for a time being but they`re going to remember you for a lifetime. they`re going to tell their children to not be afraid of anything and be a person eligible to be a person of someone. they`ll not tell their child to be good in studies but good in anything their heart draws in.

it`s shocking how with a little hope you had inside yourself you changed our world. you gave us reasons to be alive, to not be afraid of anything but be helpful towards the ones who care about us and always return the favour anyone does on us. you`ve told us to face our fears no matter what gender we are and stand tall though we sometimes fail, you never judge us. you gave us a world where we can be sad and happy at the same time, you made us feel loved.

it`s strange how you don`t even know me but when i listen to your words, i feel like you already knew every inch of my soul and body and that you might be really in love with me. it tears me up to know that i will never meet you in this life, but honestly, i want to wake up in my next life already knowing that you`re going to be there in any form or shape beside me, behind me and in front of me. in either way, kim namjoon, i`ve always wanted you in my life and a part of me, even if you don`t like that word, is greedy for you ―a person.

you`re the kind of person who can exist in any way you want in someone`s life. all they need to do is accept you in their life and done, you've already registered as their one and only someone for the rest of their lives.

thank you for being my leader, my best friend, my far-away mental boyfriend, my fellow sucker for books and poems, my brother, my fellow melancholic guy friend, and my travel partner. i think travelling the world will be fun with you but you`re more or less my whole universe so who cares for the world, huh?

okay, no kidding, but 25? *snorts* you`re still my goofball no matter how tall you are. happy birthday, joonie. a very happy 25th year to you. i hope this year becomes your best one yet.