#nblogs

[actualdevil]

Where’s the lie …

[actualdevil]

[actualdevil]

I would die for this boy

[actualdevil]

I‘m generally disappointed and disillusioned regarding most of my fandom involvement in the last few years. There’s a culture that’s become the norm here that is so toxic and miserable and has driven so many kind and talented people from it (and I don’t blame them). I’ve done a lot of thinking personally about my place in fandom and what I get from it, and slowly started distancing myself because of it.

That’s not to say I’ve given up entirely. I still like these series and I still like making content, but there’s a level of involvement (in some fandoms) that I don’t see myself coming back to, just because of the frustration and misery that comes with. It feels like every day I see something awful on one of my feeds that makes me wonder what the hell any of us stick around for.

Of course, it’s the passion for the series, game, whatever - that brings us back - but I do want everyone to really think about how they interface with fandom and whether or not it’s bringing more stress or more joy to them.

Like ... does your fandom spark joy? I mean that legitimately. Are you spending more time stressing from anon hate, general anti culture, or otherwise? Do you feel pressured to make content but you don’t feel like you’re enjoying it anymore? Re-evaluate. Think about what made you happy in the first place, what makes you happy now. Pursue what brings you joy.

There’s no reason to stick around if you find your net enjoyment of your fandom experience is wanting. Take care of yourself. Don’t go through blogs that talk shit about you, don’t browse antis and their tags, don’t instigate. That in itself is a subtle sort of self harm where you’re intentionally bringing misery into your own life.

It’s hard living in this world, and when your escape is filled with even more hatred and misery, it can make things feel genuinely hopeless.

I love you guys and my ask box is open if you need to talk. You can love and enjoy a series and fandom without this. Surround yourself with kindness. Treat yourself well.

[actualdevil]

[actualdevil]

Your local devil has been alive for one more slutty, slutty year

[actualdevil]

I haven’t opened commissions since losing this blog the first time, but I think I’m going to open sketch (maybe ko-fi?) commissions soon.

I hope I get some takers! 💦 I really need to pad out my income, since I’ll have a few months of no work coming up soon.

[actualdevil]

I feel like I'm being haunted by the Loki at the end of the new What If Thor comic ... I close my eyes and all I can see is his beard (the one on his face, not his wife)