#ncan

[brogatory]

Lil bastard ass camera.

Howdy.

M'names Dirk Strider. I build robots for a living.

If you're seeing this, we're probably both most likely dead. Dead as hell.

If you ain't, then I'm just talking to myself. Which ain't new.

"Love to hear myself talk"... Whatever, Ro.

This is my journal that I happen to be uploading to whatever constitutes as Ghost Internet.

So. I died. Slapped around by a suppressive sad fish woman and got killed by my own damn sword. Absolute mythical levels of ironic thematic bullshit right there.

Stuck in purgatory with some batshit feral version of my little brother-kid.

You know, the regular shit.

...

Jesus this is a stupid idea. Why'd I let her talk me into this? It ain't like Hal's around...

[brogatory]

*pokes you*

standsinthecorner asked: Stares at you with the biggest fucking eyes ever. Uh. Chirp. Or something

Anonymous asked: *pokes you*

consistentscreaming asked: hiiiiiiiiiiiiii :3

0rphiichaze asked: AWOOGA AWOOGA AWOOGA HUMINA HUMINA HUMINA sorry.

[brogatory]

Helloooooo, handsome. I hear you like robots. I happen to be a robot...perhaps we could go out together sometime? Stares up at you with my big sweet eyes

I don't fuck birds.

[brogatory]

MAMA !!! MAMA !!!!!!!! MAMA A WOMAN BEHIND U !!!!!!!

Anonymous asked: dirk look out!! Anonymous asked: oh hi hal!

?!?!

Wh-

[brogatory]

momma a woman(?) behind u.

Anonymous asked: what’s that running around behind you?

Huh?

What the fuck are you talkin about? Ain't nothin there

[brogatory]

Is hal with the kid?

...Sigh.

Yeah.

Hal, Sawtooth, n Squarewave all are with Dawn.

Er, Dave.

...

It was Hal's idea.

[brogatory]

ifnore my last asks can you be my father. sorry

consistentscreaming asked: sorry, didn't mean to spook you! y'alright over there?

...

Son of a fuck.

I'm. Fine.

[brogatory]

This is not the timeline we last left you in...

Can you tell us more about yourself?

Anonymous asked: Hello, Dirk. We are not dead, and yet you are most definitely not alone here. Would you like to tell us about yourself? Or ask any questions? We have seen many versions of your reality, so an exchange of information could be fun!

Sorry, what?

..

Fuck.

Y'all are those kinda weirdos. Okay.

...

Unh.

I'm. Dirk. Most people call me Bro. I'm 37.

I was 'born' to prepare the world for my kid, Dawn. Or, uh. Dave, I think, is what he chooses?

That was my only purpose in life, and I completed it.

I have this ability to know about things I shouldn't.

My sister, Roxy was preparing for Roan. Rose? Rose.

They're our kid-parent-children. They're going to become something better than we could ever be.