So as the name implies this is a road/journey to become submissive. After many years of being together my husband and I decided to rewrite our marriage into one that is D/s. It was my idea after finding wonderful people/blogs and discovering that D/s is No.1 not all pain and suffering No.2 it isn't all meek, abused women. These subs are fierce! So, I am going to be documenting our road here on Tumblr to maybe show the next person the same thing.
After around two decades of being together, Hubby and I have our status quo. This rewrite has brought about some growing pains and struggles. Some of them kinda funny, some annoying, and some unexpected. Let's start with the funny shall we?
-What to call him? After being in a relationship for so long we of course have loving nicknames that vary from babe to pookie wookie,-- LOL!-- but trying to conform I tried a couple traditional Dom titles out for size. It was bad! You should have seen when I tried "Daddy". Having three young children the daddy title made his skin crawl and he made it very clear "Little behavior" would not be tolerated. (No judgement, just his hard limit.) The rest felt really forced and impersonal. The exact opposite effect of what the honorific should be. Therefore we went with "Hubby" or "My Husband" for more serious moments. I have been known to call him these beforehand and there is no higher ranking for the two of us than Hubby and Wifey.
- Growing pains. Previously I loved (and still love) to serve Hubby. I had submission tendency without realizing it, but it was always on my terms. I would plate his food, get him drinks, that kind of stuff, but if I didn't want to, I didn't. We are both struggling to learn that he tells me to do and that is the expectation. Bad habits, as we call them, need to be broken on both sides. Hubby is learning to gently correct me and I'm learning to put his wants above my own. It was hard coming up with appropriate consequences for what we had up until now considered everyday life. We use writing lines later in the day when we realize that we screwed up and didn't recognize the need for immediate correction. He stands or sits with me as I write and read each line out loud. This way I get the correction and he gets the mantra.
-The unexpected. After being more... Cough cough... Active, my body needed a break. Hubby had no problem with this. So, we did our nightly grooming routine and went to bed. Even though I was extremely tired I laid awake. I needed our new routine. Nothing blush worthy, just to feel connected. Hubby got out of bed, I made it quickly and kneeled in the center. After kissing my forehead, undid the covers, had me crawl under, he joined and pulled me to rest my head on his chest and rubbed my arm. Soon I felt that connection again and was able to drift off. I needed this and he provided.
It is amazing that only a few weeks in how much happier I am in our marriage. How I look forward to him coming home. How connected we have become. A good decision for us.
