@jcurneysend continued from this ask.
When ones mind ran a mile a minute, being able to analyze, study, and mimic those sort of talents to make your own- you begin to realize the futility of it all. How easily these paragons of hope and wonder- something a past life he could barely cling to, as if the memory faded away long ago, upheld to such a standard..
Could be brought down and made human. Made plain. Made boring.
Take for example.. Sonia Nevermind.
Sonia was born into privilege, and yet, her talent stemmed from how she dealt and helped people. Her body language, her smiles, her movements all brought others to believe and trust in her. All the easier for that infection of despair to overtake her..
And how easily one country fell, and began a war that changed this very world.
..A pause. Izuru finally realized Komaeda spoke up. He arches a brow, that bored gaze watching him, as he remarked.
"... I didn't realize I had to be amusing, Komaeda."
His very words reigned in on the fact- that regardless of what Komaeda would do or say, Izuru would have no interest.
to say komaeda had complicated feelings about kamakura was... an understatement. the man who should be the ultimate hope, who was talented beyond belief, who was a being that by all logic... komaeda should admire more than anyone else. and yet... and yet...
what a disgusting perversion of the concept he was. it's like the other's existence was a sick joke. stale, unmotivated, and worst of all... despair-inducing. komaeda had no place to judge, of course, being a member of ultimate despair himself. but it isn't like he is a stranger to being a hypocrite.
despite it all, he is fascinated. perhaps part of him believes that kamakura might end up turning things around one day. but he doubts it. he truly doubts it. for someone who was supposed to be the greatest hope of mankind, he sure was a disappointment. what a sham.
‶ ahaha... well, i guess it doesn't matter what someone as low as i am thinks. ″ komaeda was never the best at making conversation, but compared to kamakura... he might as well be a super high school level conversationalist! not that he would ever think of himself that highly, of course. but it was hard to have more than a brief back and forth with the guy.
‶ but i can't help but wonder if you're even capable of it... ah, but please do not mistake my curiosity for insolence! you are "loved by talent" ... aren't you, kamakura-kun? it's only natural to wonder about the extent of that. don't you think so? ″